Oh Happy Day! 2

I achieved another NSV (No Scale Victory) today. I put on a pair of trousers, that when first bought were uncomfortably tight and ended up in the wardrobe after only one outting. Now they are comfortable, well more than comfortable, loose! Not loose enough for me to dare to go down to the next size, but what a wonderful way to start the day!

Everyday, even with the occasional hiccup, has been a reminder that I made the right decison. I have finally invested in myself. Still feel it was a bit of a selfish action but I know both CM and I will benefit in the long run!

I know there are going to be some aspects of my health that won't be resolved by my weight loss, but I look forward to the day when I can walk much longer distances without keeling over in pain. I truly do hope that with my combination of weightloss and gentle exercise, I may firm up my joints enough to prevent me causing any further damage.

Not sure what I am going to do today, I know I have food shopping to do. That is also a major benefit my shopping bill - when I shop for household food and animal food - has dramatically decreased! I eat less than CM!!!! Lord help me when my size justifies clothes shopping lol. It's a good job I am not keen on Sinsburys TU! They tend to be at least one size smaller than the lable says. Why is it, that two articles of clothing from different stores can be so dramatically different?

I have asked for clothes vouchers from MOnsoon and next for xmas presents. I won't spend them immediately, I may hold onto them until I get to a size 16 or maybe even 14! 16 is my initial goal and 14 my final goal. I have never been smaller than 14 and doubt I would look that good so skinny. I'd laugh if I managed to get into 12's and then probably panic!

You know it's funny, a part of me is terrified about losing weight! Not sure why that should be. I should see it as a positive. Maybe that is the problem. Being fat (I still hate that word) protected me, I stopped thinking about being attractive, which meant I gave up on contemplating dating, safe in the knowledge that I would never be wanted. Maybe it will still be the case when I get down to my ideal size? It's silly though isn't it, I guess my blubber was keeping me safe from being hurt. I am going to have to work on my self-esteeem!

have you started dating yet??