Lets Party !!!!!

We had my youngest sons birthday party today and we had such a good time. The whole family was here and the kids made out like bandits. All my kids got gifts "just because". My least favorite is an electric guitar that is very noisy and annoying. But the kids love it..

My dd said something that crushed me today after everyone left. I was fixing dinner, and she said "mom, I don't want to eat tonight, I want to shrink my tummy." I was like What? Why I like your tummy. She then tells me that Nana and her step aunts (nanas dd's) told her she needs to stop eating so much so she can shrink her tummy. This pisses me off beyond belief. I am quite aware of my childs issues, yes i think she can lose weight but I am not going to tell her she needs to stop eating to lose it. I also don't agree with putting that kind of thoughts into a 5 YEAR OLDS head....

I am going to take a step back and look at the whole pic. My father, yes I love him but I have always felt that he did not support me like he should because I was overweight. He left us as kids for months at a time, we didn't know if he was dead or alive. As a child I always felt that I was the reason my dad left my mom. He left when I was two weeks old because of another woman. When my dad was around he would make hurtful commits about my weight that were not incouraging or supportive. I wonder if that played a roll in my weight gain and addiction to food?

My dd looks up to her aunts, and her step grandmother (who is the same age as me I might add). They are obsessed with looks. Nana allows the girls to "advertise" with the way they dress. They both have shirts that say things that I would not wear as an adult like "size does matter" and "this shirt looks better wet!" I don't know they are just such snobs that I don't want there opinions about body image effecting my dd happiness.

My daughter is thick but in no way is she fat. I do see some signs that tell me she is not eating only when she is hungry. And I am battling those demons, everyday. We are changing our whole family, begining with me. I want our family to HEALTHY not skinny because its the thing to do. My dd will alway be bigger than others her father is 6' and her mother is 6'2. I just want to scream "STAY AWAY FROM MY DD"