Not just a pretty face...

I've been told all my life that I have a pretty face. Up until now, I've been content with just having a pretty face. Now I ask myself, what is a pretty face with the confidence to go and do all the things life has to offer. I second guess even the smallest party or event. I am consistently starting and stopping the diet process. I eat for so many reasons now that it is just unbelievable. I ask myself, how did I let it get this far? I visualize every event. From the seats on the airplane to the rides at the amusement park and everything in between. I worry that this is going to take over my life, no it has taken over. I use to be a lot of fun now I'm more of a hobbit. I stay home and I cook and clean for my husband and I even go to school online for fear that I will no longer be able to put my big hips behind a desk. I hate this fear of embarrassment, but it has started to control every aspect of my life. My mother is completely for the surgery, but my husband isn't as understanding. My mother has watched me struggle with my weight for what seems like forever. Whereas my husband thinks that because he can diet and exercise and loose weight, so can I. I wish I could make him understand that I am tired of fighting a loosing battle. I need something more than just a diet and exercise plan. My biggest downfall is that when I am what I call hungry, I am going to eat. I need something to control my neverending appetite. I believe lap band is just what I need. My weight has gotten far enough out of hand and I refuse to let it continue to control my life. Where do I go from here?

(excuse my rambling on, but it really made me feel so much better!):smile:

omg. i can relate to the pretty face with little to no confidence. im having the surgery on July 30th and i think it is the best decision of my life so far. i can't wait until i feel better and have more energy and confidence. and i really dont care what people think. as long as you feel good it shouldn't matter.

I totally understand the feeling of helplessness as far as weight loss is concerned. Even if I lose 20, I know from experience that 30 + is gained and after half a life time, that equals 100 over the "ideal". I am scheduled to be banded 8/25/09 and because of my insurance, I had to begin the 'process' of insurance approval 2/2009. I wasn't sure at the time if I would go thru with it but I didn't want to wait until 2010 and wish that I had already started the ball rolling. Now that I have been approved, and failed to lose weight the last 6 months, I know this is the right decision. Maybe taking steps towards banding..just in case you decide on that avenue...would help you feel more in control.

The banding or Lap Band is a PROCESS let me tell you!!! I read every thing as well even the bad experiences. I have now been banded three full weeks. I was so scared at the beginning of the process. The process does give you time to think, time to decide if you want to tell people and time to TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE. Now that is what happened to me. I had a doctor suggest to me and I said no way was I going to have surgery. Now two years later it was my taking control of my life. Because I wanted to have a life. I too had problems with seats and desks and planes and buses and feeling less than in every way. It had to stop!

I was banded on June 29 which ended up being early than my regular date of this July 20. I am now three weeks post op and I have never felt MORE in control of my life than ever before. I make better food choices. I have a little reminder that if I eat too much or eat the wrong thing I will not feel good. I want to feel good so I do make good choices. I have tried different foods some agree and some do not, that is the way it is. I do not eat what I am not suppose to. I follow my Dr.'s orders I am very glad I made the choice to have this done. I should have done it two years ago. Best wishes to you and the choice you make. imaluckydog

im in the exact same possition as you, my weight is taking over my life. my partner is very much "when i diet i lose weight why dont you!" he doesnt understand what its like to be addicted to food, for it to take over your life. its causing problems within my relationship, i dont feel sexy, i dont want to go out in the evenings/weekends, the thought of going on holiday and wearing a bathing suit horrifies me! im currently looking into getting the band, i feel its my only hope of having a happy life!