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mousecrazy's Journal

A blog by mousecrazy in General

  • Entries

    9

  • Comments

    12

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    2,126

About this blog

An attitude of gratitude

Entries in this blog

2/1/06

What causes "blue" days? I can be going along, doing pretty good...then the next day, WHAM! All I think about is mom, I replay the scenes from her last days, I remember other times that were great, and times that I know I hurt her feelings. This type of thinking is with me all day, if I'm lucky, and several days or a week if I'm not. It affects everything...my work, my family, my attitude. The strange thing is, I KNOW I'm doing it, I know it isn't helping, and I cannot nudge myself out of i

1/29/06

What's the hot topic for today? I've been thinking about "community." We all have our little groups (communities)...family, work, church, activities, our children's activities....maybe even people who have chosen the same surgery, like here at LBT! These communities give us connectedness to the outside; they provide a meaningful way for us to relate to each other. Sadly, not everyone feels that they belong to a community, so they make some up: gangs, drug and alcohol abusers, unhealthy rela

1/28/06

I found myself saying to my best friend last night, that I was ready for a new chapter in my life...I just didn't know where it started or what it would be. Looking at that idea more closely, I feel very positive about what it means. I think it means that I am coming to terms with the big losses of the last year, and know there will be better days. One of the teachers I work with wrote this on a sympathy card: "Your life will never be the same, but it doesn't have to be bad." That's a big idea.

1/24/06

Acceptance. I was reading a book last night, and acceptance was the topic. It was in Simple Abundance...I am sorry, I forget the author's name right now. Sarah Van...something. The point is that in order for us to move on in our lives, we must accept where we are now. That IS our weight on the scale, this IS our messy house, this IS my unfulfilling job, etc. Very simple. HUGE IMPACT! That idea clicked and clicked and clicked. It works in regard to accepting the death of my mom. It wo

1/23/06

Let's talk about weight and perception of weight. Very few subjects cause as many intense reactions as a discussion of weight....unless you want to mention religion and politics, which I don't (right now, anyway!). I remember doing exercises with my mom when I was probably 10 or so...by the time I was in jr. high, we were trying all kinds of crazy diets. Remember the one where one day you ate only bananas, the next day was eggs, the next day grapefruit...I think there were 10 days of that. H

1/22/06

The important thing about this date is that it is (was) my parents anniversary. It would have been their 51st anniversary. I am proud of dad...he went to church this morning and we sat together. It seems like just yesterday we were sitting in church, last year, celebrating their 50th anniversary! My DS and I had special flowers on the altar to commemorate the special day. We all posed together after church, with the flowers...we had all their friends send cards, and we have a great big storage b

1/21//06

Saturdays...I remember when Saturdays meant sleeping late and hanging out, just waiting on Saturday night's excitement. Now, it still means sleeping late (well, anything later than 4:45 AM is late to me!) but the hanging out has pretty much disappeared. Now, there's laundry, and cleaning, and errands...there are bills to pay, activities to organize, and transportation to arrange (these last two are related to DD!) Saturday night excitement means my FIL is coming for dinner. Strangely, not al

1/20/06

People say it is good to get back to your routine. I think that is true, because life is for the living and life does go on. One of the saddest parts of my day is my drive to work. I have a long commute, 40 miles, which takes close to an hour. Each morning on my way to work, I would call my mom...she was always up early, and it was our time to visit. She lived between my town and the town where I work...so we lived close to each other, too. She knew all my friends, all the people I work wi

1/19/06

First of all, this journal won't be specifically about lapband surgery and weight loss. I'm on this site every day more than once usually, and I need to start journaling again. So, it's just common sense to use this space. Secondly, I like to write. Last year, 2005, was the toughest roughest year I have yet experienced. My mom had surgery, stayed in hospitals for 5 months due to complications, and a septic infection finally ended it. Her funeral was on what would have been her 73rd birthda

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