Alright... maybe it's just me. Or maybe not!

I absolutely can NOT go out to eat!

I'm not sure if I'm stressing myself out which is making my band tighter, or if I feel like I need to eat differently in front of people? But whenever I try going out to eat, or even just eating with other people, I have a really hard time!

I take small bites and sit in between but it seems like it just doesn't matter. I can manage a few bites and that's about it. Even for those few, I have trouble getting them down.

Ugh! I don't go out to eat often. I think I've tried three times since I got my band in March and I got stuck for one and was super uncomfortable for the other two. I pick foods that I know I can eat and go for dinner, not earlier. I have to be careful with food choices as it is earlier in the day, as my band is pretty tight during that time period.

Anyone else have this issue?

I have more problems with "out to eat" food -- even when it's just me and my hubby. I don't know if it is the consistency, or what. It seems restaurant food is just a little more "sticky" -- breads, rice, pasta, or the steamed veggies tend to be broccoli or "tougher" veggies. But...yeah, I get stuck more in public!

I can go out to eat! We go out a couple times a month. I just make sure that I choose foods I know won't give me trouble. If it's just my husband it's easy. If I'm with a group (and might get more talkative, if that's possible, and "forget") I just remind myself before hand to eat carefully. I also put my drink just out of reach so it won't be easy to forget, because I can NOT drink and eat. It hurts like the dickens!

I'm glad it's not a problem for me. From the very start I wanted the lap band to make me more normal, not less so, if that makes sense. I didn't want to be the one who can't eat and has to run vomit. God forbid.

I do have papaya enzyme on hand, too, but have never had to use it when out. And fortunately I usually can tell if I've swallowed too quickly without chewing well and can remind myself to SLOW DOWN AND CHEW!

Also, remembering that it's usually more about the company than the food helps me immensely.

I haven't really kept myself from going out to restaurants, but i'm very very carefull about what I order, usually fish, or something else that doesnt give me problems, I also drink my glass of water, just before I eat, just in case...which I know is a no-no, but I just don't want to take a chance getting stuck in a restaurant. Once, I got stuck and was on the verge of throwing up for 40 minutes, had to stay in the bathroom, while the staff kept knocking on the door, asking if I was alright. I was sooo embarassed. Getting stuck is awfull, but getting stuck in a public place is worse! So, i'm very very carefull what and how I eat. Also, like the others stated, the problem is not as much the food as it is the distractions...I guess I still haven't quite go the hang of it...I sometimes forget to chew a bite to death, then swallow...then it's too late!

It sounds like you are stressing yourself out and that will tighten you up. You might have to work on some mental exercises and maybe practice eating something from takeout. Learn not to psych yourself out.

I can eat out. I always get Water with my meal, which I may or may not drink as necessary in public. I play it safe, though, end up ordering whatever with mashed potatoes, please leave the goop off. I find that I can eat ribs as the meat is softened. I also tried hard shell tacos. I get two of them with no lettuce and that is about right for a serving after I break off part of the shell. I even had some chinese with no issues, no rice of course. They were confused by that. It just takes some time to chew up the meat and veggies. I do order a regular meal as the kids meals are always the same chicken nuggets, hotdog, grilled cheese or corndog with french fries. My family happily finishes off anything I leave on the plate. I don't even try bread, rice or Pasta. I am going to try spaghetti squash and see how that goes.

I am developing a sense of when to stop eating as I am not bringing a scale with me.

I do think your trouble with eating out is stress related, especially since you're ordering foods that you know you can eat when you're home.

Some people say drinking something warm helps to loosen their band. I wonder if you could try taking some warm tea with you to drink before you get to the restaurant. Maybe you could give something like one of my favorite soft foods, the Black Bean Soup at Panera Bread. Then once you feel relaxed with soft foods, work your way up the consistency latter to something like a soft broiled fish (if you eat fish). Take tiny steps, and hopefully you'll be able to enjoy a dinner out with your friends &/or family.

(I just noticed you're from VA. I live in the Richmond area. )

Edited September 17, 200916 yr by kiz

Due to my job I have to eat out a lot, so I have a few tricks that work for me.

Lunch - I like to go for soup and half a sandwich or an appetizer. I get soup but I do not eat the broth, I will take the veggies or pasta out because it is mushy and easy to digest. The sandwich...I don't eat the bread, which is nothing unusual in this day.

Dinner - I always start with a glass of red wine because my doctor told me it helps rest my esophagus. I check and see if anyone wants the bread and ask them to take it away if no one wants it. I do not get a glass of water, I ask for a glass of ice to prevent me from drinking while eating. I look for a fish and mashed potato combo as it is always a winner.

Always see if someone is willing to share a meal or ask them to box half of it for you before they even bring it out. I hate how people look at me because I eat so little, lol.

Spend a little time on line reading menus from places you like to go. Look for things that will be reasonably easy to eat -- even a little bit toward the "slider" types of stuff. Pick a place, what you want to eat and plan a dinner out. A nice sit-down dinner. Order what you planned, which would be things that you eat without any problem.

Once you have a dinner or two out without issue, then you should be fine because I really do think you're over-thinking it and getting yourself totally stressed out.

I go out to dinner at least once a week. I've been to pretty much every kind of restaurant and know what foods work for me and what I can order at any given place. Broiled/grilled fish with mashed potatoes and and overcooked green vegetable is such a common menu combination and it all works for me. I don't eat any of the bread that is served with meals out because I never know when bread will be a problem for me. And, heck, I don't need the bread anyway.

Check the appetizers closely at places you know serve large portions because you can get an acceptable portion for less money and I've found a heck of a lot of appetizer items that I would never have ordered otherwise to be really yummy. I was always guilty of ordering the big dinner and ignoring the appetizers.

Good Luck

Nope, not just you. There are 2 issues eating with a band, what you eat and how. I pretty much can order appropriate foods at most places. The problem is how self conscious I am about the way I eat, especially since my last fill. I have to eat really slowly now, waiting between bites. I notice how much more slowly I am going than the others, so I tend to start speeding up. Before long, I'm excusing myself to get rid of something that is stuck.

You know, some of this really puzzles me. If you have a small amount of time (like say over a lunch break) to get in, eat, get gone, then yes I can see the trouble.

But if, say, you are meeting friends for a social gathering (lunch or dinner) then honestly, who cares how fast you eat? These things, at least in my experience, are generally filled with laughter and lingering over food etc. No one would even notice if I only ate 1/3 of my meal, except maybe to ask if I didn't like it. To which I could say "I've been talking too much" or whatever!

A good friend once said "It's about the company, not about the food" so if you're in that kind of situation, well, don't sweat it! If you ARE eating with people who will watch your every bite and comment on what you're eating, how you're eating it etc, then WHY are you with those people anyway? I mean, unless you're 11 and they are your parents.

You know, some of this really puzzles me. If you have a small amount of time (like say over a lunch break) to get in, eat, get gone, then yes I can see the trouble.

But if, say, you are meeting friends for a social gathering (lunch or dinner) then honestly, who cares how fast you eat? These things, at least in my experience, are generally filled with laughter and lingering over food etc. No one would even notice if I only ate 1/3 of my meal, except maybe to ask if I didn't like it. To which I could say "I've been talking too much" or whatever!

A good friend once said "It's about the company, not about the food" so if you're in that kind of situation, well, don't sweat it! If you ARE eating with people who will watch your every bite and comment on what you're eating, how you're eating it etc, then WHY are you with those people anyway? I mean, unless you're 11 and they are your parents.

Or, unless they are your colleagues who are all thin and obsessed with food i.e. not eating it, but focussing on what everyone else eats!

I've just had 2 days of that on a training course with all meals provided. Misery

That's pathetic. Just think, they may be thin, but they all need a life!

That's pathetic. Just think, they may be thin, but they all need a life!

Tell me about it! My boss - a very slim woman in her late 40s - is getting more and more obsessive about how much I eat. Luckily I only see her about once a month (I'm in medical sales, on the road), but she cannot leave it alone. She always comments "Oh, is that all you're having?", when I am having more than she is ... e.g. I always choose Soup when we are out, to avoid PB. The soup is nearly always a thick, creamy sort, so probably laden with calories. She chooses a large salad with a couple of olives/shavings of cheese. My soup will contain far more calories than her pathetic salad!

She is getting more and more uncomfortable with the attention I am getting from colleagues re the weight I have lost. I think she was happier when she was the only older woman in the team to be slim.

She'll just have to deal with it, won't she? What a maroon, as Bugs Bunny would say!

OH OH and you probably won't do this because I think you're probably too polite

but the next time she says "Is that ALL you're going to eat?" say "Oh, I had a small pony just an hour ago" LOL

Edited September 18, 200916 yr by RestlessMonkey

I don't have any friends that obsessively watch me eat or anything like that. I think I maybe just stress out about the prospect of getting stuck, and then I get tight? Not sure.

I've found now that soup is just really the way to go for me when I go out. I've tried other things that normally go down, and they don't when I'm out. I'm not eating too fast or picking items that aren't band-friendly.

Bah! Oh well. I don't go out often, so it's not a huge deal. I just wish I wouldn't stress myself out about it. Perhaps in time...

I worry about eating out as well. I'm in Medical Sales as well and constantly eating out. I have a meeting to go to next week that is going to be stressful! 3 meals a day for 4 days catered and provided by the company. no food choices. I'm sweating thinking about it already. Half tempted to get an unfill before I go! Suggestions on how to handle this would be great!