I expect all of you to rail me if I'm not doing the right thing!! Do you hear me?!?!

Holy Cow MAN!! I woke up and weighed myself and I was 255.2!!! :biggrin: WTF?? What is wrong with me? I feel so terrible, and I feel like a blasted failure... Okay, just so you know I had gotten all the way down to 227 Lbs. Then I fell off, and when I say fell off, I MEAN WAYYYYY OFF!! I could just feel the blood drain out of my face... dammit!

I keep going up and down, up and down. I'll get back down to the low 240's, then I'll forget all about what I was doing and the slider are right back in my mouth and my scale is climbing back up again. But this is ridiculous. I haven't been this weight since right after surgery when I blew right past the 250's. So... today... right here and RIGHT FREAKIN NOW THIS IS GOING TO STOP!

So, I'm looking to you my VV sisters to look after me, pick me up and give me that swift kick in the ass that I so desperately need right now. Why? Because, I'M NOT A FAILUREOR GOING TO MAKE MY BAND A WASTE!

This right here is going to be my daily diary. ...and when I say daily, I mean every dang day. If I miss a day, I expect you to send me email or whatever to say, "Hey WTH are you?" You know...

I'm going to write to let you all know what I ate for the day, what exercises I did - did I slip up? Did I have a great day? How much did I weigh that morning... anything and all information pertaining to my weight loss is going to be right here.

That it ladies... I'M OWNING UP!

I think you had a great Day 4... and as for not being perfection - nothing is! You had a great day, you pushed yourself on the exercise, you noted where your trouble-spot was, and you persevered to do it another day.

That is fabulous! Commendable! Wonderful!

YAY LilMIss..............

Hang in there Irene. One bowl of popcorn isn't going to ruin your efforts. Look at the scale for heaven sakes. Have you tried doing something with your hands while you watch TV to keep you from wanting to snack. I crochet while I'm watching TV or play a mindless computer game. Can't eat while I do that.

Writing it down and actually thinking about what you are doing is getting you where you want to be. You go girl!

Even if you weren't perfect in your mind, it looks great to me!

Congratulations on all of your hard work!

March 14, 2009

Eating:

7:30am: Breakfast Bowl of Frosted Shredded Wheat. Regular

11:30am: Lunch, Small burger w/bacon no bun. Handful of Cheese Doritos

2:30pm: Snack, 4 bites of honey bun and 3 starburst

5pm: Chicken Wrap (Had flour tortilla, lettuce, cheese and chicken)

6:30pm: Vanilla Cupcake

Exercise:

12N: Walking, 1 mile

8am: 30 minutes Calisthenics

Daily Weigh In:

247.6. -2 from yesterday and -7.7 running.

Moods/Thoughts:

I guess there is not much to say except I really need to think of better snacking choices! Whenever I write down the prior days foods, I look at the solids I’m eating and I think… not too bad. Nothing wrong with a burger every now and again, as it was small and I tore half he bread off. Not because I didn’t want it mind you! It was because I couldn’t tolerate it. J The chicken wrap also was small and really light. It tasted good too. I really wasn’t very hungry, but I was hungry enough to realize I’d better eat or I’ll be starving later. Since I have my 7pm rule, I knew I didn’t want to get caught up breaking that one again two days in a row.

I was able to sneak in a little extra walk today. It was a nice day! I didn’t really log how much distance I was doing, I just considered the amount of time I did it, and the speed I was going. So… I did better than expected on that.

Down two more pounds from the day before. Wow, I really was not expecting that at all. I was thinking a small drop. I’m telling you though; I’m taking it all in! I’m so glad there is that thing called water weight. :thumbup: Haha!

The good thing I think I need to consider is that, I’m doing this all by just living my life. I’m not doing any gimmicks, like the pouch test, or the South Beach plan. I’ve tried all those and then some. That is in fact one of the contributors to my decision FOR the lap-band. So I wouldn’t have to “diet” anymore. I don’t really; I just watch my portions (with much help!) and keep up with my physical activity. That is all doctor expects of me, besides trying to incorporate more healthy snacks (which I need to work on). He does ask that I stay away from the slider foods of course, because you sure can take in more than your fair share. I have been and it’s really showing.

I’m just doing it, by waking up and making a conscious decision to make sure I’m eating relatively good, but very small portions, and exercising daily. Got that down! The scales are favoring me right now. Before I get too overly excited about that I do have to remember that I’ve been here before, in fact many times over the last 6 or 7 months. I have to keep in mind if I don’t stay on track and start making better snack choices all this will be over and I’ll be going back up… again! I have to stop this cycle! Especially since I want to be back to where I was when all this started by the Fourth of July. I made that my goal for the 4th of July challenge in the general Lap-Band forum area. That is just 3 months to get there. That would mean I need to lose about 1.8 Lbs per week. I think that is more than reasonable. Right within what a bandster should lose per week.

Wow! I’m rambling now… hehe! See you tomorrow.

I think you had a great Day 4... and as for not being perfection - nothing is! You had a great day, you pushed yourself on the exercise, you noted where your trouble-spot was, and you persevered to do it another day.

That is fabulous! Commendable! Wonderful!

YAY LilMIss..............

Hang in there Irene. One bowl of popcorn isn't going to ruin your efforts. Look at the scale for heaven sakes. Have you tried doing something with your hands while you watch TV to keep you from wanting to snack. I crochet while I'm watching TV or play a mindless computer game. Can't eat while I do that.

Writing it down and actually thinking about what you are doing is getting you where you want to be. You go girl!

Even if you weren't perfect in your mind, it looks great to me!

Congratulations on all of your hard work!

Thank you ladies!

I asked the Admin to move my thread, even though it hasn't been moved just yet. I just wanted to give you a forewarning in case you are looking for it and it has been moved. I believe there will still be a link in here for awhile so you can follow along with it. It will be in the general supprt area. I figured more people would be able to see it and follow my journey with me.

I'm also hoping to help to inspire more people, as I know there are alot of bandsters who struggle now and then.

StLG, I have actually started up a new social group for bandsters who like to do crafts. So far no one has joined. :thumbup: I guess there just isn't much interest for that. I do like to create beads I've found just recently. I don't have a whole lot of time, and that's also something I realized I can't do while watching TV. :w00t::crying: I have to pay attention to what I'm doing too much.

I have thought about crocheting, you're right! I used to do that when I was younger, my aunt taught me. Good thing too, you can still look at TV while doing it.

Okay so it's off to Michaels to buy their yarn that is on sale.. LOL!

Irene,

Thanks for the updates. It's motivating to read about your day to day stuff.

Irene -

Keep up the good work. I have to admit that looking at how you are keeping yourself accountable makes me want to do it too. Thanks.

March 16, 2009

Eating:

No record… sorry!

Exercise:

6pm: 30 minutes Stationery Bike. 7+ Miles

Daily Weigh In:

247.8. +0.2 from yesterday and -7.4 running.

Moods/Thoughts:

I’m not even going to get into it this morning because I was really bad yesterday. I didn’t even post anything, but the site has been doing its thing so no love lost. I’m even going to make it quick today for the same reason.

My eating started off good yesterday, but I ended the day in a bad way. I’m not even going to say much on that, only today I’m going to be especially good. I don’t even feel good today! I’ll be good today folks. I have a reputation to uphold! LOL!!

I did my workout so at least I have that to be proud of. I’m always pretty good about that. I won’t be able to do my outside walk today however because it’s a rainy mess here. Hopefully tomorrow will clear up, because I really miss it when I can’t do that! Now, before you say in your head – “why not do the Treadmill”? Well some of you may already know that I’ve been diagnosed with arthritis in my knees, and my orthopedist told me I’m not to do the TM anymore. Awwww!! Haha! I guess the belt pulls on my knees and give me a huge amount of trouble. My knees have thanked me much for staying off. I’ll just have to get my walks in when I can do it outside.

My weigh in… *sigh* Well, my bad eating showed today. I gained a slight amount. I guess I better get with it! I hate writing all this crap out. It’s embarrassing!!! I guess I’ll take my medicine today you guys. It’s what I’m expecting.

Grrr…

See you all tomorrow!

Irene,

Thanks for the updates. It's motivating to read about your day to day stuff.

Irene -

Keep up the good work. I have to admit that looking at how you are keeping yourself accountable makes me want to do it too. Thanks.

I have to tell you, just when I think I'm about to fall off the wagon and start doing what I want, I remember that I have to admit it. It's really working.

No I'm far from perfect, but having to write it out and recognize that I'm not doing the right thing really opens my eyes.

Thank you so much for your continued support! You are what keeps me motivated!!

hi irene

you are doing great,im following your foot steps,doing a journal of my daily intakes thanks for the ideas i am just like you in soo many ways.its a constant struggle to stay focus....but we will succedd it may take us a bit longer but we will make it to goal...lol

OK LilMiss, it's tomorrow! Yesterday is gone; what's today been like?

Crappy weather takes its toll on me, too - and remember, I live where there is seemingly endless snow!!! It doesn't just impact your ability to walk, but bad weather can affect your mood too, and that just means if you at all use food as a crutch, you are headed for double-trouble! So, I'm hoping for fair weather for you!!

Keep journalling here - you are helping more than you can know!

hi irene

you are doing great,im following your foot steps,doing a journal of my daily intakes thanks for the ideas i am just like you in soo many ways.its a constant struggle to stay focus....but we will succedd it may take us a bit longer but we will make it to goal...lol

Thanks sl, struggling is my middle name. I think I seriously under-estimated myself when I got the lap-band. Does that make me a bad person? I don't know. I think I just let too many things cloud my mind and in turn I make choices I really shouldn't. Oh how I wish I would have done more research on other options! I don't know, but since I have the lapband I have to make this work to my advantage until/if I get something else down the line.

Let me just say, I'm not totally hating on the band. I truly appreicate it in that if I DIDN'T have the band, I would right now be where I started and beyond. I am grateful I haven't gained back more!

OK LilMiss, it's tomorrow! Yesterday is gone; what's today been like?

Crappy weather takes its toll on me, too - and remember, I live where there is seemingly endless snow!!! It doesn't just impact your ability to walk, but bad weather can affect your mood too, and that just means if you at all use food as a crutch, you are headed for double-trouble! So, I'm hoping for fair weather for you!!

Keep journalling here - you are helping more than you can know!

Hey girl! I'm here!

I'll use this opportunity right here to say this. Yesterday was... :lunch:. I stayed home because I didn't feel good. I can only guess why I didn't feel good. I got up to lunch hour doing awesome, then I had a CupO'Noodles with some crackers. Ritz. Then I blew it, and to top it off I didn't even workout!!! Oh I failed big time yesterday.

:wub::mad2::frown::w00t::sad:

Anyway, today I'm being much better I promise! I'm back at work and that is when I do my very best.

I need a paddle to my bum! I'm not doing what I"m supposed to be doing, and I didn't even record it... tsk tsk!

I will today though I promise, in fact I already am! I'm going to be so good even that I forgot my Sony Walkman and I'm still going to go out for my walk. It'll be boring without the music but I"m going to do it anyway. Teach me to forget the music!

Sorry guys for not upholding here. I do admire all of you for making sure I'm doing it though! xoxo!!

hi irene

its a new day and a beutifull one.......yesterday is gone we can do this.......LOL MARIAH

lilmisdiva why aren't you having a fill? sorry if i missed something, but it seems like u are way too hungry and able to eat too much. why don't u call ur surgeon.

Thanks Mariah, I did much better today! I'm just getting to run off to do my Calisthenics. xoxo

Thanks iwalk for your concern. I am plenty tight. I get hungry, its pretty normal. I call my surgeon, yes. Some people eat more than others, I don't feel there is anything wrong with that. I can still lose weight even with eating up to 1600 calories per day.