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Sex addiction?

I have been dealing with a whole new issue now that I am well on my way to goal of being at 145lbs. I used to weigh 240. That was just last March. Now i weigh 177. I am not at goal yet but I am starting to feel like this will happen. When I was heavier I kept my urges to myself because I felt gross and not at all sexy. Now I feel a LOT sexier nad I am wanting sex a lot. I feel like a pervert. My husband is thrilled but sometimes I feel like hes thing "Does this girl wanna screw all day long?" I really dont but I am wanting to do it more than 1 time a day. I have also been fantasizing about other men, and having my husband watch. We even rented a video that had a girl giving 3 men head at once. He told me he liked that. I realize that these feelings come from not feeling wanted for so long. Its kind of scarry. I know my husband doesnt want to actually go through with the sexy thoughts and fantasies. He told me so. Not that I would want to rally go for that. I am happy with my current sex life. I just feel like I have woken up a sleeping sex pervert(Me) Has anyone else had this issue?

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  • OK, new to this posting thing. Just wanted to say, I havent had the surgery yet, but my biggest fear is when I do I will have these same issues again. I think that I may have gained the weight in the

  • I can only hope that this haapens to me, or at least some of it:-) Sex has been a huge issue for my husband an me, he wants it all the time and I don't because I don't have the desire and I don't fee

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OK, new to this posting thing. Just wanted to say, I havent had the surgery yet, but my biggest fear is when I do I will have these same issues again. I think that I may have gained the weight in the first place to try and stay true to my husband of 12 years. I have always been a bit oversexual. It's possible that right now my inner sex pervert is just hibernating but will awaken as soon as some of the weight is gone. I don't have the answers for you but I do understand your problem.

Andi

  • 4 months later...

I think that what you are experiencing is a natural urge that has been surpressed while at your largest. I say this because when I first met my husband I did not wiegh as much as I did when I finally made the decision to have the lap band surgery. Having said that, our intimate life was much better and more often back then than what it grew to be as I was gaining 100+ pounds. Honestly, I would say that we were doing it anytime and all the time. But as I grew heavier I stopped having the desire, whether or not I wanted to I didn't because I did not feel good about myself. My husband, on the other hand, has remained steadfast in always wanting to be intimate with me no matter how big or small I was. (He is truly a God send!!!) Now that I have shed some of my wieght, I have noticed that my desires and wanting to initiate it has increased. My suggestion to you at this point is to just keep communicating with your husband and keep him involved in your fantasies. Best wishes!!:confused:

  • 5 months later...

I understand completely. The last time I lost a lot of weight I became sex crazed... for me it was about the power... and the attention. It felt soo good> feeling sexy and desired.

This time I have joined Overeaters Anonymous because I realize now that I had traded one addiction for another and I don't want that to happen since I am happily married this time.

This is my story and only applies to me...but just wanted to let you know that u r not alone.

I wish, I left my libido back somewhere in 1995 after my first baby, sigh.

I dont see it as a problem. Your husband is happy. Neither of you plans on acting out the fantasies in real life. Its not interfering so much in your daily life that you dont have time to do anything else. It sounds more like its just a new experience for you, more so than a real problem.

Enjoy it.

  • 2 months later...

Just wanted to say you are not alone. But beware it can get ugly because it can turn from watching on tv to acting out in real time and that becomes real addicting i know. the rolls have reveresed on me and my husband now doesn't seem to want it. Donno why try to talk about sex and he clams up.

I can only hope that this haapens to me, or at least some of it:-) Sex has been a huge issue for my husband an me, he wants it all the time and I don't because I don't have the desire and I don't feel sexy, but he doesn't understand that because he loves me no matter what. He has also accused me of getting it elsewhere becuase he isn't getting it enough, and I have tried to explain to him that it is not him, it is me and if I wanted it I would surely go to him for it, it makes me feel really bad and guilty and this is the one issue we fight about constantly, so I am really hoping for a change once the weight starts coming off.

I don't think it is abonormal it is probably having everything kept inside you for so long and it is now getting a release and going crazy. I say go with it and see what happens, it is very good that you are talking to him about it.

Counseling. Counseling. Counseling. It's not out of the range of normal to want to test out the new you. If you truly feel that the temptation is unavoidable in the short or long term, then you probably need to talk about this with a third party that isn't vested in you personally. You might just need to talk it through and get some reassurances...or you might truly need some more extensive counseling. But counseling can, and does, make a difference.

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