I hooted when I saw this because it's so true of many of us. Hope you enjoy - It's from Obesityhelp.com

A thought on Fills

Original Post by Caro Marks at 6:31 PM PST on 06/15/2005

Sacramento, CA

I've named it "fill-psychosis" - this mad drive to....get a fill! Pre-surgery, all I thought about was getting/paying for the surgery. Surgery successfully completed, I now obsess on fills, and why not? Do I want one? Do I need one? Does my doctor think I need one? If not, can I con her into giving me one anyway? Will she give me one at gunpoint? How long ago was my last one? How many pounds have I lost since my last one... is it time for a fill or do I need its evil cousin, the ...(sinister whisper) UNfill...?? Lets check it out! Am I hungry? Am I hungry more often? When I wake up? After I exercise? When I go to bed? When I go to the dry cleaner? Has my weight loss slowed down? Have I hit a plateau? Can I swallow a chicken-and-peanut butter sandwich?

I've had two successful (a third was not) fills since my surgery on February 3. My first was for 1 cc and after 6 weeks I WAS getting hungry, slowing down, etc. So I had my second last Friday, for 1.5 cc and only today, 6 days later, can I swallow tender salmon - its been liquids almost exclusively since then and it was a rough few days. Two days ago the dreaded word "unfill" passed through my thoughts as I clutched my sternum in agony, trying to swallow a spoonfull of chowder. Today, the swelling is down and the little man on the floor of my esophaugus (he's "with the band", *wink*) flings open the door to my pouch, welcoming in the well-chewed food with a small bow. Today I welcome my new fill.

The fill experience is not so bad. My doctor gives great fill - he discusses the to-fill-or-not-to-fill question, then he does his thing absolutely painlessly. Then, if you can drink 2 glasses of Water without exploding, you can go, and boom you're back in the car cautiously sipping a V-8.

I've lost 39 pounds since Feb 3 and I am mighty happy. If I had the option of suddenly waking up tomorrow at my goal weight I am not sure I would choose it. Losing the weight at a steady, consistent and reasonable rate is in many ways a triumph in itself, and gives me the months of practice I'll need for the whole killer-chewing, no-clean-plate-club-here new lifestyle I'll be practicing after I am at goal.

I've named it "fill-psychosis" - this mad drive to....get a fill! Pre-surgery, all I thought about was getting/paying for the surgery. Surgery successfully completed, I now obsess on fills, and why not? Do I want one? Do I need one? Does my doctor think I need one? If not, can I con her into giving me one anyway? Will she give me one at gunpoint? How long ago was my last one? How many pounds have I lost since my last one... is it time for a fill or do I need its evil cousin, the ...(sinister whisper) UNfill...?? Lets check it out! Am I hungry? Am I hungry more often? When I wake up? After I exercise? When I go to bed? When I go to the dry cleaner? Has my weight loss slowed down? Have I hit a plateau? Can I swallow a chicken-and-peanut butter sandwich?

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That IS a hoot!!!! Very funny and well-written. Best of luck to Caro, thanks for the perspective!!! We CAN get a little obsessed about all this band stuff, huh? It's reminding me to sit back and just be banded a minute!

I really enjoyed reading this. This does seem like a bandsters typical day. Wondering if your doing everything right or wrong and You wonder if a fill will help you or if it will be to tight or will you be able to eat. It is such a big puzzle that sometimes fitting all the pieces together can be a daily challenge. Thanks for sharing.

P.S. I WILL NOT BE TRYING THE chicken AND PEANUTBUTTER SANDWICH!!!! LOL!!!!

Kidding...yes...I can honestly say that Chicken and Peanut Butter isn't in my priority list of things to try but...I think i'll be okay.

actually chicken and Peanut Butter are quite nice. I make squers (can't spell to save my life) in different styles. I do a terryaki, a fajita and a satay. The Satay uses a peanut butter dipping sauce. Very nice.

It's sort of like chicken and chocolate. Ye-gods! what is she thinking? It's called Mole` (Mexican)

Great post. Reminds me a lot of myself. Now, was I too hasty getting unfilled? (Only kidding, it's going back on Monday) But believe me, it did cross my mind & all those other thoughts as well. Chicken & Hummus are my favorites, so why not chicken & peanut butter. (was going to abbreviate Peanut Butter; not a good idea)

Wow - How do you all eat chicken? It really sticks and hurts....I tried it with mayo and found it goes down better but am concerned about the mayo???? Peanut butter? Haven't thought of it - but used to eat it on occasion. Lettuce wraps with peanut ginger sauce is awesome..... Been unbelievably bad lately - just sold my house - should close tomorrow - had a lot of last minute anxiety...lost a key person at work and now have to stay and finish...cause I'm the boss...and there is NO overtime...so, us poor salaried persons have to stay....want to change jobs but concerned about my age and weight....going for a fill on Friday....maybe that's what I need???? that and to slow down..... anyway...been great hearing from you all....as above, is the fill the answer? Will see.

I loved that post too! I try not to let the thought of fills enter my mind too often and would rather stay at a nice consistent fill level than risk the dreaded overfill. My initial reaction to the Peanut Butter chicken thing was a major YUCK but I forgot I LOVE a spicy peanut sauce on chicken.

Charlie- I find dark meat much easier to eat and make sure you cut and chew it in tiny pieces. I find its good with a little cottage cheese.

Bumping - to remind me to get over my wanting more,,,,,,

Oh my god!!!...I think that's me except for the peanut butter and chicken..I don't know about that...I just made an appt fot another fill today..Last one 10/11..so do I need one or am I just out of control in general? Hmmm....something to think about...Great post!!!!

My personal favorite since I was a child - Peanut Butter and sliced thin sweet gherkin pickles. The absolute best.

I haven't had a fill yet - but I have toyed with the thought that I need one. My lab band nurse says I don't need on and that I have lost weight without one.

She said if I come back next month and haven't lost more - then she will discuss it with me.

I just don't want to waste any time and slip backwards. Thankfully - I haven't gained any of the weight back. That is new!

Good Luck,

Nancy

There are days I wake up and find that I can have no restriction and days I wake up and find it hard to get in what i am suppose to. The days I wake up with no restriction the first thing that goes through my head is...Do I need a fill? Has my restriction disappeared overnight? Did my band slip? I worry constantly about all that stuff. Sigh...as if we dont have enough to worry about

As for chicken...I love it and have no probs with it at all. I have chicken about 5 nights out of the week.

Y'all are crazy...yeah, I think about fills, but I always think about stretching my pouch or my band slipping...I am so scared something like that will happen, even though my doctor reassured me there's a small chance of that, especially since my band is stitched on both sides, all around. That sucka ain't goin' nowhere! I have the same thing, where sometimes I can eat normally, and the next day, it's like I just got a fill...? It's weird, but I guess it's part of being banded. Mornings are the tightest for some reason!! Great thread!

WOW! That was a great post...mostly because it let's me know that I am not CRAZY! I have been obsessing about the whole fill thing ever since I got my band...and now that I am 1 month past my first fill...I am obsessing about getting my second fill. (I also weigh myself at least once a day....but that's a whole other story.) I constantly read the posts on here and compare myself to everyone else (I have less of a fill than her, why can I eat chicken with no problem, why am I not constricted in the morning, why haven't I ever PB'd, she had her second fill only 1 month after her first one, etc.) ARGHHH! It's enough to make you want to tear your hair out!

Ok...I feel better now!

P.S. Chicken and Peanut Butter...gross....but chicken and peanut butter satay....YUM!

I still laugh everytime I read this post. I am much smarter now about fills that I have been in the past.