Well here I am, 27 days away from bypass and I’m in a panic! I’m starting to think “I can do this by myself”. My family believes in me and has encouraged me saying, “you’re doing so good, you can do this without surgery”. Part of me believes that because honestly I’ve never maintained healthy eating AND exercise for 6 months in my life and here I am!!!I guess I’m just scared of all the risks and what if here I am healthy, I become one of those sickly, complication patients? Is this normal? To get cold feet? I don’t know if I should postpone or just go for it…any encouragement or advice is appreciated!

Can't speak from experience, unfortunately, as I'm still in early stages but assuming I'm able to successfully lose weight leading up to the surgery, I've wondered about the same thoughts. Even asked my doctor if a lot of people drop out after their able to lose on their own (she said no). The reason I think I will continue is I've successfully lost weight in the past only to gain it back later. I think I need this change to make it a permanent loss. I don't know if you've been able to lose on your own in the past only to gain in back, but that may help you decide if you should go forward.

I have lost and gained plenty in the past. However I honestly have never gone 6 months on my own eating well and exercising like now. I usually have thrown in the towel around month 3-4 when weight loss slows so this is a big improvement. I think I’m just nervous and trying to rationalize not getting it….

That's what it sounds like to me, but I hope others with more experience jump in to help you. If you go through with it, you've set yourself up so well for long term success knowing you can eat well and exercise regularly even without it. I've gotta believe that makes the chances of success with it that much higher. The one thing that keeps entering my mind - almost everyone I hear from who's had the surgery says they wish they'd done it sooner. Very few regrets.

it's pretty normal to have cold feet before a major surgery...

I can just tell you my own experience. I spent literally decades trying to lose my excess weight (I'm in my 60s). At my highest, I was well over 300 lbs. I tried over and over and over again to lose it. During my more successful attempts, I'd lose 50 or 60 lbs. And invariably, a couple of months later, the weight would start piling on again until I was back to where I started. During my less successful attempts, I'd lose maybe 20 lbs. Same thing - it was only a matter of time before I'd put it all back on. I had over 200 lbs to lose. I finally accepted the fact that I'd never get that off if I couldn't even keep 50 lbs off.

Fewer than 5% of people with a significant weight problem can take off their excess weight and keep it off. Maybe you are one of those lucky few. I was not. Weight loss surgery was the only thing that ever worked for me.

as for complications - yes - there's a risk of them, as there is with any surgery. There are even risks associated with having your wisdom teeth removed....or your tonsils. But many of us never have complications - and of those who do, most are minor and "fixable". Major complications are pretty uncommon. You're much more likely to suffer complications from obesity than you are from weight loss surgery.

Complications are fairly rare. And honestly—this is from someone who resisted the surgery because "I can just do it on my own"—I wish I had kicked my own butt 15 years ago. It's not that it's effortless—I have to put in work to lose weight—but it's that when I put in the work, I actually lose the weight, instead of that incredibly frustrating "why isn't this working" garbage.

Basically what you're getting is a tool that doesn't allow you to deviate much from the plan. But you still have to reduce eating and get in exercise. The difference is you can't fall off the wagon. Your new anatomy won't allow it, and by the time you get to the point where you could overeat, you'll be so used to tracking what you eat and being careful that it'll be second nature. I mean, I'm only two months out (from sleeve, not bypass) and I already always automagically reach for my phone when I set food down in front of myself.

I think what you’re feeling is pretty normal prior to a big surgery. I went from being super excited to two days before the surgery being weepy and crying thinking what if something happened and I would leave my two kids behind? My youngest hasn’t even turned one and it killed me to think I wouldn’t be able to pick her up for a couple of weeks after the surgery.

Well here I am 3 weeks later, no complications, super easy recovery and down 24lbs. Just think about why you’re doing this and how far you’ve come in the process and that should give you the extra push you need.

I'm only 2 months out from sleeve surgery. I had the same thoughts, PLUS just about a year ago finished cancer treatment for Stage 3 melanoma. I was worried that doing the surgery would somehow prevent my body from being able to fight cancer. I tried and tried and tried to lose weight and my body would not budge, even while undergoing cancer treatment. Finally, I decided on surgery when my last PT scan came back clean. Best decision I ever made. Just like other posters have said, it's a tool. There have been so many times I would have turned to food, but thanks to my surgery, I physically could not. I'm down about 60 lbs. and fitting back into clothes I wore 20 years ago. Plus, I eat much healthier than when I was going through cancer treatment. When you can only eat small amounts of food, you make sure it's the most nutritional food for your body. It's a tough decision to make, but you will thank yourself for doing it.

Totally normal! I was nervous all the way until the anesthesia kicked in lol. Only you know if you're truly ready for this change, but I read so many accounts where people said their only regret was not doing it sooner, which helped me a lot. Honestly I wish I did it 10 years ago to give myself a better chance with loose skin rebounding, since age seems to be a big factor in that area.