Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Holiday blues



Recommended Posts

Bleh. I don't want to cook, clean, bend over backwards to cook a huge meal. So I'm not.

Going to the big family dinner is gonna be It for me this week. This way I only have to make a couple of dishes, someone else can bust their ass to clean their house and run 20 dishwasher loads afterwards and beg borrow and steal chairs & tables silverwear etc.

But it seems as the holiday blues has hit most of my family this year as we almost didn't have the huge dinner.

Different work scheduals, people not able to get thanksgiving off. The cost of gas etc. and the fact that no one really wanted to have 50 people tromp through their house and have to clean up after it all.

Also the fact that the traditional *family head couple* are now both in a nursing home really squashed the spirit of having the huge get togethers.

Tons of the various cousins no longer even live in easy travel distance either so my SIL finally relented and said fine. She would hold it.

Now tonight DH asked if I wanted him to get the x-mas decorations out and I told him no. o.O (for me this is a major change) I didn't think I would bother this year.

I'm still debating it. Part of me wants to and part don't. Guess I will leave the decision up to my kids.

But at least I'm making low fat, low carb, NO SUGAR dishes to take to the dinner since half the family are diabetics.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I live for the day after New Year's when it is all over. I wish we could just cancel Christmas just once!!!!! I like the holidays where you dont have to cook, see any of the relatives, buy presents, or eat 3 lbs of cream cheese. I like Columbus Day, now that is my kind of holiday. A day off from work and no "family" to deal with.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, I am feeling the blues because I am longing to have my family close to me. My family is in Texas and I can't enjoy the holidays with them. My brother lives in town but has to spend the holidays at his in-Laws and my husband's family, well they are just retarded.. No really, I would love to have a ton of family sit together and share a special meal.. I asked hubby if we were getting together with his family and he said he didn't know. I called some of my SIL's but they aren't sure what they are doing. So I'll probably just cook for my kids and husband. It will still be great, but I sure long for those crazy, loud family get togethers. It is really not about the food anymore, but about spending time with loved ones.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm having a hard time believing the holidays are actually here. I think it might be tough for me this year, as I just moved away from my family for the first time really (I didn't live with my mom, but always within about 10 miles of her, and now I'm out of state). I'm going to my In Law's for Thanksgiving, and to mom's for Christmas, but still.

Thanksgiving is going to be rather crazy. My husband has 9 older siblings, of which 7 will be at his parents' house. Among them they have something just less than 30 kids, most of which will be going. It's very different than my family. When we all get together at mom's house, at most there's like 12 of us, lol. I am just hoping that the kids wont be too rowdy because my MIL was just told that her cancer is NOT gone and she will have to do another round of chemo.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Marimaru, I'm so sorry to hear about your MIL. Enjoy your family.

My husband is one of 14 children and for the past six years we take 3 wks to travel to Mexico to spend Christmas and New Year's with his family. Wow, between his bro's, sis's, & their spouses, kids, there are lots of people. But it is great, sometimes annoying, but great. And it is truly special to see the look in my MIL face to be surrounded by all her children and their families. I am kinda bummed that we might not get to go this year. Finances are tight since we moved into our dream home and that's that. I'm praying that my old home will sell and that we can take our trip, but it is looking grim.. It makes me really sad because the kids really look forward to this time. They love my kids so much. (My husbands family that lives in Mexico can't travel here so it is the only time of year we get to see them.) I get teary eyed just thinking about it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am a Christmas hater. My kids get so mad at me. I wish it was like Leap Year and we only had to do it every 4 years.

My daughter is pregnant and due in April so maybe having a little kid in the family will make me not hate it. I doubt it though.

We discussed this in another thread. I think it was Laurend that said Christmas music makes her want to stab herself in the ear drums. I totally agree!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Being down about the holdays is really out of sorts for me. Normally I'm raring to go with holiday decorations, making Cookies and baking etc. Little handcrafted gifts for stockings but I dunno. This year its just not the same. Part of it is I'm really upset with myself for not putting back more $$ for presents.

Ever since I started being on disability each year the gift lists get smaller and smaller.

My other half got a nice raise this year but with all the rising costs of gas/food etc. Its like he didn't even get a raise.

And its not cause I haven't tried. Its because life keeps throwing major curveballs in to suck the $$ away. Like right now. Our one vehicle had its power steering pump go out. AND a MAJOR oil leak. Neither thing can be put off.

The loss of our cat Tommy was another 1200$$ chunk that we are working on and now the clothes dryer has died. o.O.

My boyfriend is a bit distraught because this makes 8 years we have been together now and he hasn't been able to get back to see his mother in that time. And shes not getting any younger. hes from a big family too. He was #10 and the baby of the family so he's used to allot of togetherness at holidays, and I think it bugs him a bit that he's to far away from his own family.

Also the family that is local me and only one of my 2 ex SIL's are really even close. (yea ex's family I am closer to them then he is :) )

they all have kids now that have their own kids (0-4) who only ever come by around the holidays and dont have any contact the rest of the year which up till the last 2 years wasn't the case.

When my ex's parents weren't in a nursing home everyone was much closer. I guess I'm seeing now how much of that must have been due to their influence, last holidays when it was just mom in the nursing home everyone seemed to go out of their ways to come and visit grandpa, tons of xmas cards, calls etc. But when it came to the family dinner Dad insisted she come. And with altzheimers she was really uncomfortable with that many people around and it wasn't a pleasant experience.

I can't help but wonder if allot of people are afraid of a repeat or something. Maybe its all just me.

Might just be the fact that one of my own kids is now in the cousins bunch that live farther away now.

Guess I'll have to see. My own oldest son will be home tomorrow. But he only lives next state over and is taking a train to be with us for the weekend.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am a Christmas hater. My kids get so mad at me. I wish it was like Leap Year and we only had to do it every 4 years.

Thank you! I've wanted to say that for a long time but haven't had the guts. Some aspects of Christmas a just a huge pain in the butt. Like decorating. Why drag all that crap out just to have to tear it down again after New Years? I have no artistic sense whatsoever and anything I do looks stupid anyways:doh:. And all the baggage attached to gift-giving just wears me out! Why do I have to spend time and money buying stuff to ship to my obnoxious sister-in-law and her husband in Oregon when we see them once every three years or so. And heaven forbid my buying something on-line and having it shipped! DH says that's too impersonal.

I do get more time off than the average person, as I work for a faith-based non-profit and it is considered a religious holiday, but then I have to listen to DH whine because he has to go to work ... I could go on but you get the idea -

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Last year I decided to start all new traditions that selfishly meet MY needs. I don't attend Thanksgiving feeding frenzy. I cook something unique just for DH and me. We are not decorating the outside of our house because we travel during December - and the Texas wind can bring down house lights. I do most of my shopping online. My stress level has dropped so much since I decided to relax a bit during holidays.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have 6 kids, 4 kids in law and 13 grandchildren. I got so I hate Christmas. A couple years ago I started to buy everyone a 25$ gift card I buy couple each month . I have a dear dil that loves to cook so she has everyone at her house. My ex is there too and we all get along. It's so much better than when I had to buy a zillion gifts and cook all day and then clean for 3 days after. I don't decorate anymore either.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I do Thanksgiving at MY house now, with just the DH and the kids. Then I can control what I eat without praying no one is watching. I like it better that way. Xmas is going to be the same! :(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I used to have about 30 people to buy for. Then I finally told everyone that I was only buying for my kids and my dad.

This year I got roped into drawing names with my husband's side of the family. I don't even want to do that. He passed away over 20 years ago, and I don't want to shop for his family. I hate shopping with a passion, and I hate being forced to shop for people I don't even want to shop for.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i, hate the way people are so fake , around christmas they act like you are there best friend but after they act like they don't know you, as buying gifts. i buy for kids only cut them off at 18. i can't wait for dec. 26

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Eve411

      April Surgery
      Am I the only struggling to get weight down. I started with weight of 297 and now im 280 but seem to not lose more weight. My nutrtionist told me not to worry about the pounds because I might still be losing inches. However, I do not really see much of a difference is this happen to any of you, if so any tips?
      Thanks
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Well recovering from gallbladder removal was a lot like recovering from the modified duodenal switch surgery, twice in 4 months yay 🥳😭. I'm having to battle cravings for everything i shouldn't have, on top of trying to figure out what happens after i eat something. Sigh, let me fast forward a couple of months when everyday isn't a constant battle and i can function like a normal person again! 😞
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×