I am so sick of society today where a fricking jokes can't be said or where you have to tie your damn tongue on the basis you may offend everyone ! Lighten up people there can be humor in things.

Usually I would agree with you but then there are those who say something extremely inappropriate and justify it as a joke.

A slam is a slam is a slam.

I am so sick of society today where a fricking jokes can't be said or where you have to tie your damn tongue on the basis you may offend everyone ! Lighten up people there can be humor in things.

I completely agree. At my work you have to tip toe around those who may be "offended."

Another complaint I have is how you can't even say Merry Christmas without offending someone. No more Christmas carols in schools. What is wrong with people these days? Say goodbye to the manger scenes in towns because all that is bing taken away these days. I can see how some may say that they are not being represented so go ahead and expand on it but don't take away others traditions.

Another complaint I have is how you can't even say Merry Christmas without offending someone. No more Christmas carols in schools. What is wrong with people these days? Say goodbye to the manger scenes in towns because all that is bing taken away these days. I can see how some may say that they are not being represented so go ahead and expand on it but don't take away others traditions.

This I totally agree with. I don't understand how suddenly "Merry Christmas" became an insult.

Of course, I don't understand why saying "Happy Holidays" is so bad for some people either, it's not THAT big of a deal. BUT this comment I think says it all: "I can see how some may say that they are not being represented so go ahead and expand on it but don't take away others traditions."

I have to agree that the "being offended" goes too far sometimes and it needs some lighten up... if it was meant as a joke, in my opinion it's just that, a joke.... I personally don't take it seriously.... I would like to think that I know when someone is seriously attacking me or when they are just joking... and to me a joke could be about pretty much anything..... I love the Catholic, hispanic, black, rednecks.....No offense to anybody please!! all kinds of jokes, really! I don't take offense with jokes at all....

To me, it really depends on whether the person cracking the joke belongs to the group or culture that he's making the joke about. You know, whether he intrinsically understands the nuances of that culture. Otherwise, it just appears to be a person playing to people's prejudices and hoping to get a laugh by, in many cases, denigrating an entire culture or group of people.

I think sometimes taking the effort to make it clear "this is just a joke" is worth its weight in gold. A big fault of mine in the virtual world is that I tend to read things very literally -- take them very much at face value, even though IRL I'm a very sarcastic/dry humor person and don't often take things for face value. To my dismay, this can often be seen as antagonism or a mediocre job of hiding some finger wagging in the virtual world. Early on, I was often told "A smiley will go far."

Unfortunately we all know that a 20/20 hindsight "I was just kidding" is little more than a CYA move, moreso than a real explanation.

I think being overt in your intentions, if you at all doubt how they will be received, can only be a good thing.

This I totally agree with. I don't understand how suddenly "Merry Christmas" became an insult.

Of course, I don't understand why saying "Happy Holidays" is so bad for some people either, it's not THAT big of a deal. BUT this comment I think says it all: "I can see how some may say that they are not being represented so go ahead and expand on it but don't take away others traditions."

Agreed, let them all be there, holidays, Christmas, just don't try to take away any of them....

hi chris...i totally agree with you...it's crazy how sensitive people have become...

one reason i am glad i moved to texas...it is more acceptable to say merry christmas down here.

while i was in NY...i would get the look of horror if i said that.....

I think sometimes taking the effort to make it clear "this is just a joke" is worth its weight in gold. A big fault of mine in the virtual world is that I tend to read things very literally -- take them very much at face value, even though IRL I'm a very sarcastic/dry humor person and don't often take things for face value. To my dismay, this can often be seen as antagonism or a mediocre job of hiding some finger wagging in the virtual world. Early on, I was often told "A smiley will go far."

Unfortunately we all know that a 20/20 hindsight "I was just kidding" is little more than a CYA move, moreso than a real explanation.

I think being overt in your intentions, if you at all doubt how they will be received, can only be a good thing.

Very true. It's one thing to start a post with "Funny joke about...." It's very different to post something that makes fun of a group of people that had been discussed in a rather heated on-going discussion, especially when you know that there are members of that group currently posting on the board. In other words, the impression changes from "this is meant to be funny" to "this is meant to piss people off."

To me, it really depends on whether the person cracking the joke belongs to the group or culture that he's making the joke about. You know, whether he intrinsically understands the nuances of that culture. Otherwise, it just appears to be a person playing to people's prejudices and hoping to get a laugh by, in many cases, denigrating an entire culture or group of people.

Well, I have a friend that is from the south and I'm hispanic , we have been friends for a long time, used to work together and ever since the beginning of our friendship, I guess I could say we clicked and we used to joke with each other about our backgrounds, she would try to talk with a cuban accent and I would try to talk with a southern accent and we both made fun of each other, laughed at each other all the time, I clearly remember on Halloween one year... she dressed as a cuban rafter which was darn funny, she wore sort of a hawaiian outfit with a live safer around her waiste and a plastic fish biting her butt....she put tons of tanning lotion all over.....it was too funny and I was a pregnant redneck woman... but I don't know if she fully understood the nuances of my culture, frankly I really didn't care.. I'd like to think I did understand hers because I have lived here for a long while to have learned some of the culture by then... but to me, it really didn't matter, up to this day we still make fun of each other's background ....

That's where context comes in. I'm thinking of one of my friends who happens to be black. She and I will joke about each other's etnicities in ways that we wouldn't with just anyone. That's because we know each other, understand the intent, etc. I think Laurend is referring to a situation where you don't inherently or automatically have the context of friendship, mutual understanding, etc. For example, when I first met this friend, I would not have said the things to her that I would say now, because we didn't have that comfort with each other. Out of respect for her and not knowing if she would take things the way I meant them or not, I refrained from anything "off color" until that comfort had been established. Saying things to a close friend, and saying things to a literal or virtual stranger - apples and oranges.

That's where context comes in. I'm thinking of one of my friends who happens to be black. She and I will joke about each other's etnicities in ways that we wouldn't with just anyone. That's because we know each other, understand the intent, etc. I think Laurend is referring to a situation where you don't inherently or automatically have the context of friendship, mutual understanding, etc. For example, when I first met this friend, I would not have said the things to her that I would say now, because we didn't have that comfort with each other. Out of respect for her and not knowing if she would take things the way I meant them or not, I refrained from anything "off color" until that comfort had been established. Saying things to a close friend, and saying things to a literal or virtual stranger - apples and oranges.

I hear you, we were that way since the beginning because we sort of clicked right away though... but I see your Lauren's and your point...

Now I'm thinking...maybe I offended somebody by dressing up as a pregnant redneck woman.... oh gee...:faint:

That's where context comes in. I'm thinking of one of my friends who happens to be black. She and I will joke about each other's etnicities in ways that we wouldn't with just anyone. That's because we know each other, understand the intent, etc. I think Laurend is referring to a situation where you don't inherently or automatically have the context of friendship, mutual understanding, etc. For example, when I first met this friend, I would not have said the things to her that I would say now, because we didn't have that comfort with each other. Out of respect for her and not knowing if she would take things the way I meant them or not, I refrained from anything "off color" until that comfort had been established. Saying things to a close friend, and saying things to a literal or virtual stranger - apples and oranges.

Yes, exactly. That's also sort of what I was trying to say with the whole "belonging to the group makes it different" thing, too. It's one thing when you are joking around with a bunch of people that belong to that group and you happen to be a member of that group, also. But if you aren't a member, and you're making the joke to a bunch of people who also aren't members of the group in question, then it just comes across more as pandering to prejudice than making a joke.

I hear you, we were that way since the beginning because we sort of clicked right away though... but I see your Lauren's and your point...

Now I'm thinking...maybe I offended somebody by dressing up as a pregnant redneck woman.... oh gee...:faint:

One time for Halloween I dressed up as Aunt Jemima. If anyone was offended it sure didn't show.

My problem with PC issues are when someone is really slamming another and they call it a joke so they can get by with it.

When it comes to Christmas it was originally a Pagan holiday and many seem to be offended that the Christians took it. My thinking is that the Christians took it long before any of us were born and to be personally insulted by it is... well, silly.

I do not support tax dollars going for mangers and such, but if someone wants to have something like that on their property or church, kewl Beans.