Hi everybody!

I am new here. I am Jess but also go by Chandni. I am 38 years young, live in Germany and have been overweight since I was 5 years young. I am pre-OP. A week ago I had my first chat with the Adipositas center at our MIC clinic.

A bad time to start because due to the holidays I couldn't start on getting any of the paperwork started lol

Well, up until a few days ago I wasn't even sure if I'd do it, and actually I still half expect to run out when time comes. I am terribly scared of not waking up after surgery, or if so just to say goodbye. Phobia of death makes decisions like that super hard. But on the other hand... Decades more of life and a better life than now is super tempting.

So at least I'm getting started now and then take it day by day. Hope to get to know you guys in the process. [emoji1]

Sent from my A8 plus using BariatricPal mobile app

fatality rates on these surgeries are extremely low. 0.3% for gastric bypass, even lower for sleeve. That means you have a 99.7% (or greater) chance of making it through. The techniques have improved so much over the last few years and they do so many of them now that they've pretty much become routine surgeries. People have died having their tonsils taken out. But seriously - what are the odds of that happening? Same with bariatric surgery. It's not the same as it was 30 or 40 years ago. I would not worry about dying on the operating table *at all*. You're much more likely to die from an obesity-related condition than you are from the surgery. In fact, doing it could save (and extend) your life!

20 hours ago, catwoman7 said:

fatality rates on these surgeries are extremely low. 0.3% for gastric bypass, even lower for sleeve. That means you have a 99.7% (or greater) chance of making it through. The techniques have improved so much over the last few years and they do so many of them now that they've pretty much become routine surgeries. People have died having their tonsils taken out. But seriously - what are the odds of that happening? Same with bariatric surgery. It's not the same as it was 30 or 40 years ago. I would not worry about dying on the operating table *at all*. You're much more likely to die from an obesity-related condition than you are from the surgery. In fact, doing it could save (and extend) your life!

Thank you for your kind words!

You are basically saying what my surgeon said too, that the likelihood of obesity-related conditions killing me is way higher than the surgery. I have a lot of trouble already (I am 214kg with 1,90 m height) like that I can barely walk, high blood pressure, diabetes, thyroid problems and more, and to be honest I can't even imagine a life without all of that because it's been part of mine for so long. But I gather it would be pretty awesome.

A 'normal' life at least health wise would be fantastic. I don't mind putting the work into that at all. And today I actually got my first "Next year this time I will be able to enjoy the fireworks instead of focusing on my back pain" moment. So yeah I think my mind already made up its mind. Now let's beat these fears into submission.

you'll wake up after surgery. i promise you.

if you don't get the surgery, you will die - way too young.

think with your brain and not your emotions, and get the surgery. this is your finest hour. rise to the occasion.

Once you made up your mind, don’t think about it...just go thru the pre-op and follow through. I went really crazy thinking about it so I just stop. I know if I were to continue with this surgery my life would be better. I had mine done on 3rd Jan 2018 11am. I woke up 5 hours later feeling grateful to god for giving me another chance to live. I promise myself not to waste this chance that has been given to me. Take care and don’t be scared.

I understand the fear, Chandni. The risks is not zero, but it is low. And if you decide to move forward, you will do everything you can to prepare and take care of yourself after surgery to minimize any possible complications.

I also have mobility challenges due to size/back pain. I have been losing weight pre-op, and I notice improvements. It's helpful to read here people saying things like, "I'm able to walk for miles without pain" after being a few months out from surgery. May we both get our mobility back!

Thank you, everyone, for your words and support.

I keep doing all the preparations, getting my doctors' appointments, paperwork and what not together. The longer I go with that, the more my mind is imagining how it will be afterward. It feels like my mind is made up already, though there still is that tiny itty bitty corner of my mind that is like "I could still change my mind" but most of my mind won't think that'll happen.

I'm actually getting excited about what the change will bring with it.

Welcome welcome! And just keep pushing forward - when that little seed of doubt pops up, confront it and really think about what the 'real' reason it's whispering in your ear. Usually, it's the fear of the changes that you'll have to make - no more mindless snacking, no more 'I had a sh*t day so I'm gonna binge on pizza,' no more of the stuff we shouldn't have been doing in the first place. When I would think about the doubt in that way, it just made the doubt smaller each time, and my resolve stronger.

PS I think I'll be out in Berlin at the end of May for a business trip (with some added vacation days, of course!). I may poke you for some ideas on things to see - maybe we could even meet up for an international Bariatric Pal social!