So I've always had a strained relationship with my father. All my life he's called me "fat a**" when angry with me. Even up to just prior to my surgery those words would come out of his mouth. Then even after I lost the weight he accidentally let it slip once and I just busted out laughing in his face because those words have no impact on me anymore.

This said my Dad actually gave me a compliment. He saw me walk down a flight a stairs and he said for a split second he thought I had went back in time and became a teenager again. He said I look just like how he remembers me from when I was 15 or 16 and before I started packing on the pounds.

It is crazy how much the people who we love can wound us and uplift us with their words. Enjoy the warm thoughts and keep laughing when he says hurtful things.

Inner surfer girl, you have taken the very words from my mouth ! Keep going proud2beme you are doing great

@@Proud2BMe that is awesome. Congrats on your success, I noticed that you have lost more pounds than you now weigh which is amazing! Take in the compliments, you deserve them for all your hard work.

...All my life he's called me "fat a**" when angry with me...

He called you a "fat a-asterisk-asterisk"? It could be worse, he could have called you a "fat a-exclamation point-exclamation point".

You sound like a great son. I will not make excuses for your Father's words or how he has treated you in the past, nor will I say anything negative about him.

He is your Father and I want to believe that he loves you very much.

You can't change the past, but hopefully through open dialogue you will have a strong, caring relationship going forward.

It sounds like you are off to good start. I hope your relationship with him continues to grow stronger.