I've done it now!
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Well, it's done. I paid the 1000. deposit to secure my surgery date at the Healthier Weight Centre in Manchester (UK). I'm all set for August 25th with Dr Franco Favretti. I am excited and scared to death too.
I have researched this for over 3 years and finally decided a year ago I really needed to do something. It's so easy to put things off and wait for the perfect time but the truth is there is NO perfect time. There will always be work and family stresses. Every day that I wake up feeling utterly grim and unable to function normally is a day lost.
Even now I spoke to Judith at the centre saying that now that I've committed to this suddenly I want to sit in a trough of food and stuff everything possible down my gullet before I have this surgery. I know I have to diet pre-op for two weeks. You want to know what really did it?
My dh and I are due to go back to my home in the states this fall. We talk all the time about what restarants we'll visit while we are there, etc. He loves to eat as much as I do....difference is, he's just one of those naturally slim people.
I suddenly thought, gawd, I've gained even more weight since my last plane trip and I BARELY fit the darn seat then. I mean, I was too embarassed to ask for an extender so I put the blanket over my lap and tucked the seatbeat around me, under it so it looked like it was fastened. I had to force the arm guard down and was in agony as it cut into my side and ribs. Thankfully my toddler had the seat next to me so my fat didn't bother him. I was bruised for days afterwards from that armrest. I plain flat out couldn't BEAR another trip when I knew darn well I couldn't fit. That fear alone won out over my hope to have one last vacation pigout before the surgery.
I guess it'll be nicer to go home this fall having just lost a few pounds and not listen to my family ask me pointedly when I'm going to do something about myself. (sigh):bored