Now, don't get me wrong I'm not a negative person whatsoever. But I really am tired of people saying "Gosh why are you freakin out, YOU CHOSE to have surgery" All I want to do it scream yes I know...but don't I have every right to be scared. I am scared. I have never had surgery before. This is different too because it's not like they are going in to fix somethign an dI'll wake up and be like "Oh cool glad that's over." This is a huge life long journey. I'm really sick of people minimizing it. Did anyone else experience this? And also if one more person tells me I'm too young (18) to have the band and not big enough (285) UHM HELLO. OK Why don't I wait until I'm 30 and 400 pounds to get it done. yes cause that would make sense. Oh I am just so frusturated with people's closed mindedness. One of my good friends since 7th grade got upset with me because I wouldn't go to her family ruinion On Saturday. I'm having surgey tomorrow morning there is no way in HELL I could do to a party on a saturday. I just want some one to realize that it is OKAY to be scared and it is OKAY to have these feelings. Why are people to dumb when it comes to this stuff?! I don't know what I'd do without this website. Ya'll are so helpful!

Hi Audrey. You're normal.

I was the same way. I chose the surgery because morbid obesity is life-threatening... but people minimize it. If i hear one more time "just eat less and exercise"...or "the band is "the easy way out". I finally just decided that most people are just plain uneducated about it. Sometimes I take the time to educate people, and sometimes I don't even tell them I'm banded.

Anyway, I was REALLY scared before the surgery. Even though the risk of complications is small, it is surgery. and after the surgery it's a major life change and there's a steep learning curve.

I think you're just surrounded by people who don't know any better. Keep hanging around here with people who have been through it, and see if you can find a local lap band support group.

My only regret is that I didn't get banded sooner....

Everything you said makes perfect sense.....

hi audrey....it is perfectly normal what you are feeling about the surgery.

i started investigating this surgery in 2002...i just had it this past march and i went into the operating room practically hyperventilating.

like you i had never had surgery in the past....i also never was in a hospital.

but...i am VERY glad i did it.

i also agree with you...why not get it done when the problem is not bigger.

i've elected to only tell people that will support me. and NOT tell anyone that has a big negative opinion about surgery for weight loss.

i made the mistake initially and told someone who did have a VERY negative reaction...and that cured me of telling any other negative people.

i will tell you.....no one knows what we've been through unless they've been through it themselves.

i also have discovered something that makes me feel better after having the surgery...

in past i always blamed myself for my eating...emotional eating...

after surgery i've come to believe that some of my problem "pre-banding" was really physical hunger. the band is placed at the top of the stomach where the receptors are that tell your brain you are full. so i feel full most of the time now.....

the surgery is definitely a useful tool that makes me feel like i really can lose this weight.

good for you for taking this step....:clap2:

let us know how you make out...also the pre and post op lists on this website were very helpful for me...especially the loose clothing for the ride home and a pillow and blanket. i had a nice snooze on the way home.

It is so good to hear from people who understand!

I can't deal with anymore arrongant people!

Lol.

I'm glad what I'm feeling is normal because man, I really feel the kickign someone in the shin!

Today I had a wendy spicy chicken sandwhich and someone said to me "You realyl shouldn't eat that, it's deep fried chicken"

and I looked at them and said "If you coudln't have a wendys spicy chicken sandwhich ever again wouldn't you want it?"

Yeah thats what I thought.

Did any one find it hard to sit up for long perido of time?

I'm scheduled to coem back to work the fallowing tuesday...I do have a desk job though so I'm not sure how difficult it will be.

Audrey, nice name, (my 18 month grandbaby's name)

Anyhow, If I hadn't had an emergency appendectomy last year, I probably would have been really afraid about the surgery. But, that experience helped ease those fears.

However, I did have major trepidation about the lifelong changes needed to live comfortably with the band. Personally, I felt it was right up there with getting married. (29 years, this month). When I got married, (really small, 5 people including the chaplain and us) I was so distraught, I got hives in the morning and my knees shook throughout the whole ceremony. My mind kept chanting, "am I doing the right thing, am I doing the right thing?" Then it was done and over with.

I was banded on 4/23/07 and so far, it has been smooth sailing. I didn't have much post surgical pain and have not had any problems introducing food back into my system as scheduled. I hope to not treat this as another 'diet' but as a way of helping me to learn to eat normal servings at normal intervals.

I will get my first fill 6/6/07 and my Doc will do it under fluoro. Frankly, I think the thought of that is more worrisome to me than the actual surgery procedure. Who wants to drink barium?

I think it is great that this life changing surgery is available to you at your age. And, I agree, why wait to start living an improved life, when you can do it now?

Congratulations on your decision and don't let people who don't 'get it' get you down.

Cathy

Cathy,

Thank you so much.

that was such a sweet post!

you made me feel alot better.

It's such a good feeling to know I'm not alone in this.

By the way I'm glad to see the name Audrey is coming back I love it so much but man I always hated when my sister amanda and Amber got cool personalized things and mien always said "#1 Cool kid" becaus eno body made anything with my name on it.

=]

Glad to hear you doing well. Barium does scare me! I hope I never need fluro! yikes!

I was 22 when I was banded (25 now), and I agree, why wait when I know what the pattern is like and I can see where it's going!

I had my surgery on a Friday, and flew home on Monday and went to work on Tuesday and I was fine (also a desk job). You do need to be aware that sometimes there are reasons you'll be in the hospital longer than planned, so, just keep that thought in your back pocket, you know?

You should just tell people what you are thinking if they say things like "you CHOSE surgery" you can just say "just because it's something I chose to have done, doesn't mean it's not a major thing and doesn't mean I can't be scared of it".

And, whoever griped at you about the chicken sandwich is likely to say things in the future like "are you allowed to eat that? Can you eat THAT MUCH??" it's really annoying, so you should just be prepared for however you want to handle that. I had a little cup of Soup, and some refried Beans and a little salad a while back when I went out to lunch with my dad (who lives out of state) and he said something like "that's a lot for you, huh?". One of his neighbors got banded this year, so I'm hoping he'll get an education, lol.

I'm being banded next week and am feeling all the feelings that you have described. It's normal! I'd worry about you if you DIDN'T have some pause about it! Good luck tomorrow!

It is so good to hear from people who understand!

I can't deal with anymore arrongant people!

Lol.

I'm glad what I'm feeling is normal because man, I really feel the kickign someone in the shin!

Today I had a wendy spicy chicken sandwhich and someone said to me "You realyl shouldn't eat that, it's deep fried chicken"

and I looked at them and said "If you coudln't have a wendys spicy chicken sandwhich ever again wouldn't you want it?"

Yeah thats what I thought.

Did any one find it hard to sit up for long perido of time?

I'm scheduled to coem back to work the fallowing tuesday...I do have a desk job though so I'm not sure how difficult it will be.

Do what's best for you and don't worry about anyone else. It's so easy for people to voice their opion. But if they are not in your shoes it does'nt matter. So I feel like your make the best decision which is choosing to stop the weight gain before it gets worst. And if your looking for inspriration Look at me I was weighing 462 when I started I'm already down 25lbs since MAy 2 2007. Keep you head up.

GOOD LUCK 2 YOU

Well, I can't relate to how you feel before surgery because I'm still trying to select a surgeon, but I can certainly relate to people's reactions to your choice. I'm only four years older than you, and it seems to me people have a lot more negative opinion of young people receiving WLS than older people (but we all catch a lot of unnecessary flack). The negative health effects aren't as obvious... yet, so why would we do something so drastic? I, for one, don't want to wait until I'm unhealthy to lose the weight. I already have enough health problems from my weight... I don't need to wait for the rest!

I get a lot of, "You're young. You should be able to eat right and exercise and lose the weight on your own." I HAVE tried that. Numerous times. WLS isn't an "easy way out". It's a lot of work! They just don't understand what it's like to be morbidly obese (I hate that term, don't you?). Granted, the only people who know that I am pursuing the surgery are my parents, my roommate, and my boyfriend... for that reason. I just don't want to deal with the backlash from people who have no idea what it's like. I definitely sympathize. Your life is going to change now... for the better. Don't worry about the naysayers. When you've reached your goal, you won't care very much about the crap they've given you .

Like I said, I don't have a band... yet... but I've had 14 surgeries under general so I know the whole nerves before surgery thing. Even though I'm a pro, I still get nervous. I promise it's not as scary as it seems. The whole process usually seems pretty surreal. They typically give you some goofy drugs to take the edge off before surgery, so your nerves will disappear then . Until then, just take comfort in knowing that you're going to be thinner, healthier, and happier. Sure, it'll take some work, but it's gonna be so worth it.

K, I highly doubt you needed all of that reassurance, but maybe I'm just trying to reassure myself :biggrin1: . I hope all goes well, and please keep us updated on your progress.

P.S. My name is Tracie, so I never had any cool name stuff either :rolleyes . My middle name is spelled strange, also. Instead of Allison it's Allyson. What were my parents thinking? My brother and sister both have really basic names, so I had personalized pencil envy . I cherish my strange spellings now, though.

Guess what? You are totally normal! You'll go though all kinds of emotions between now and the surgery! Good Luck and keep us posted!

THIS IS SO COOL! You are having it done so young that you will most likely NOT need plastic surgery because your nice elastic skin will snap right back up AND you will live your life as a normal sized person... Consider yourself wise beyond your years for making such a big decision. And I agree with someone who posted earlier.. those people who are your food police now will CONTINUE to be....... Its the reason why no one at work knows and why I've been TRYING to educate dbf and other family.......... FOOD POLICE SUCK! already I've had to point by point explain that I'm not restricted til I start getting fills... every day its HOW MUCH HAVE YOU LOST TODAY............... uhhhhhhhhh .2 lbs LOL.... I tell them the average is 1-3 pounds a week IF I'M being good.

When I broke the news to my dad and step mom.. I put it out there like this... "I have something to tell you, but it is for informational purposes only and NOT up for debate" (they laughed, but only said positive things)

You will need a plan for those negative sabatours... its human nature for those close to sometimes feel insecure because we are changing and taking control of our lives.......... IT FREAKS SOME PEOPLE OUT..... be strong and just know............... YOU ARE COMPLETELY NORMAL!

I have a banded friend, who is one of those people who have the perfect comeback lines all the time, unlike me who thinks of the perfect thing to say AFTER the perfect time has passed!!

She had a friend (who is now also banded ironically) say to her, when she was complaining about being on liquids..."well this IS what YOU chose to do" My friend told her "Yes I did choose this, and I am choosing not to choke the living sh#* out of you for pointing that out, and right now neither one of those choices is easy!" She said they laughed about it---but now I wonder if she uses the line on others saying it to her??!!!

Kat

Hahaha. You guys are soo funny! Way to make me feel better. I am sooo glad you all here understand the more proactive you are the better. I am just praying I won't need plastic surgery. I am freaking out over laporscopic I couldn't imagine anything else! I just had a talk with my boss about the people who have said something rude to me, she is also a bigger girl and has considered the lap band. She said she would take care of it right away. Hehehe. I <3 my boss. Anyways. I am still super super nervous. I hope all this anxiety goes away.

first thing I'm going to do when I walk in the dorrs is ask for a sedative STAT!

Yes.. it is okay to be scared....I had mine yesterday and I am just a little sore today but I was still nervous going in! It is very natural to be afraid, but you are doing the right thing. Don't listen to anyone except yourself. It is a life long journey into Good Health not a landslide into heath problems due to obesity!!! Your friend will get over it if she is really a friend!

Good luck on you journey, Keep us posted with how it goes,

Peace,

Maureen

Hi Audrey! (I love your name)

It's totally normal to feel scared or nervous! Do not let anyone's negative attitudes make you frustrated. You're about to go through a life changing ordeal and you need SUPPORT! Not "Oh wells" or whateva.

I wish I was 18 when I got it done, If I could have had it done years ago.. I would have. I actually had a co-worker tell me I was too young to get it. I'm like HELLOOOOOOO, I'll be 30 in a few years. How old do you think I should be, 50??

I was scared as all hell about this.. Not really the challenge of it, but because I was afraid I wouldn't wake up from the surgery or something. HOWEVER, The morning of the surgery.. I was suprisingly CALM as all can be. My mom was so shocked at how relaxed I was (this was BEFORE those anti-anxity meds). You will be nice and high and calm before you go in!

I also had never had surgery before and it was tough the first couple days in the hospital just lifting myself out of the bed and feeling the pain. But after about the first week, I was already feeling great! I do not have ANY regrets. And once you start to lose the weight and can see/feel the difference.. You will feel like a whole new person. I am happy for you! You will do just fine!! Good luck and keep us posted on your progress : )