It still doesn't feel real. I have to pack my bag, take the magnesium citrate, and organize a few things for the week. I feel prepared for post surgery... i have the Protein powder, powdered milk, Jello, broth, etc. i have a large stock of Vitamins. i have comfortable clothes and a very supportive spouse.

emotionally though, i don't think I am ready. I can't see myself as a healthy sized person, I keep thinking that I'm going to be the person who ends up with a surgery that isn't successful. It's like I'm getting my appendix out. I'm going in for surgery and no matter how many before and after pictures i see, I think I'm going to come out the same and not lose weight. does that make sense?

i couldn't post about it on facebook. i couldn't tell my siblings or parents. i couldnt face their judgement and bad attitudes. i knew my mom would try to talk me out of it. my three closest friends, my two closest neighbors, and a few other friends know. they have all been supportive.

i should feel excited and be looking forward to the future. did anyone else feel this way? does anyone have any advice?

I promise you it gets better! I felt like I was slowly killing myself. So weak, so fatigued. Almost passed out from just walking to the fridge or showering a couple times. I had diarrhea for what seemed to be forever. Couldn't get water in. But you do what you can and day by day it gets better. 4-5 weeks was a big turning point for me. Hang in there. You will feel normal again.

Hope you feel better soon!

I'm sorry you've had a rough go of it. Hang in there...I bet the worst part is already behind you.