I had surgery last September. Even though I have lost some weight, I haven't done as well as I would like. It's been a crazy year – between my husband walking out, going through divorce among other things… I also have quite a few health issues that I can't seem to get out from underneath. I'm trying to best to get back on my feet and even if I can't do as much as I would like to do due to my health, I would still like to accomplish more and try and lose some more. I would greatly appreciate any suggestions, support, or anything at this point. I find myself not eating as much as I should and it seems like I lose weight when I eat more. I also know that I'm not getting enough Protein and enough Vitamins. My blood results are coming back and things are way too low. Presurgery I was at approximately 333 and it's at surgery I was at 317 and Last time I weighed myself I was at 248. My goal weight is 180. If I get less than not been great but if not, I'm not going to worry about it. Admittedly, I think that I am dealing with little bit of depression. I'm trying to figure out how to start over again in the multitude of ways. I also want to do whatever it is I can to help my health along and I need to do things that promote my immune system. Due to multiple disabilities, I have trouble with exercising but, I'm trying to find some sort of solution where I could have some activity at least and hopefully that would help. I hope this isn't too much information but… I thought I would try to put myself out there and see if anyone else is going through something similar or if anyone has any suggestions. Thanks so much for your time and have a good day.

Natalie

.

Edited July 23, 201412 yr by butterflybefree

I am sorry for your current predicament, sincerely. Sounds like you're going through it, all at once, and I'm sure you're feeling overwhelmed.

I agree with Butterfly; you need to set yourself up a routine.

I do not have any experience with disabilities, but I do know about the other matters.

You need to prioritise. Work out what's most important - which at this stage, is your health.

Use the alarm system to ensure you're eating at least 3 meals a day. Up your calorie content. Make sure the food you are eating is nutritious and easily assembled. (No one needs the hassle of trying to conjure up Michellin starred food every day!). As with the set mealtimes - set a little gentle exercise time every day. Even its a little bit of stretching - just to get the blood flowing.

When you build your strength with good nutrition, the rest will follow - including a bit of mental peace and emotional stability.

You're not an island unto yourself. I know it's tough, but little steps every day and you'll be back on top in no time.

Let us know how you get on. x

I'm sorry for all you have been through over this last year. I do understand having disabilities and the difficulty of moving around more for exercises. I try to at least do things sitting down when I am in a flare up or even just a "lazy"/down day. I am not sure if you remember those balloon punch ball things. I cannot begin to tell you how many I have gone through. I can get them at Walgreens 2 for a $1. When my friend comes over we will hit the thing back and forth. I live alone and even use it by myself. I'll toss it up in the air or I will use the rubberband thing and punch away. A little therapy also. I will also just swing my arms around or move my legs while laying down. I act like a nut. I'll turn on my favorite music which makes me feel good. I don't care what I look like. I just move around. They have things you can pedal. It's a pedal thing you can use sitting on the couch and watching TV. As far as getting more food in, try each day to go a little further than the day before. Set alarms to remind you to take the time out to eat and take care of yourself. I'm still pre-op and can only speak from this side. I do know my flares are less and not as bad when I do have them when I take care of myself. Not easy and it can be a struggle. Take it a day at a time. If it's too hard to think about a day, take it in chunks. Think about your current meal and that you are doing it for you. I'm sorry if I rambled on. Just what I was thinking while reading your post.

You are right... I really need to start some sort of routine... I just feel overwhelmed sometimes and almost as if I don't know what to do. I just need to get over the hump. I have a great deal on my plate.. Not only my stuff but my dads too and other family members.

Music helps... I kinda get in a grove when I am listening to music... I have very eclectic tastes.. Just depends on my mood.

Please don't worry about rambling.. Lol, I do it too... I appreciate the sharing and honesty.

I am sorry for your current predicament, sincerely. Sounds like you're going through it, all at once, and I'm sure you're feeling overwhelmed. I agree with Butterfly; you need to set yourself up a routine. I do not have any experience with disabilities, but I do know about the other matters. You need to prioritise. Work out what's most important - which at this stage, is your health. Use the alarm system to ensure you're eating at least 3 meals a day. Up your calorie content. Make sure the food you are eating is nutritious and easily assembled. (No one needs the hassle of trying to conjure up Michellin starred food every day!). As with the set mealtimes - set a little gentle exercise time every day. Even its a little bit of stretching - just to get the blood flowing. When you build your strength with good nutrition, the rest will follow - including a bit of mental peace and emotional stability. You're not an island unto yourself. I know it's tough, but little steps every day and you'll be back on top in no time. Let us know how you get on. x

You both are right.. I need a routine... That way, I get in the swing of things..

Eating three times a day and eating enough is an issue.... I just don't care about eating and I am not hungry.. I could go all day every day with not eating or eating once. I don't eat a lot either... One or two bites and I am done. I know what you mean about food though,,, I try and make my family stuff that they like and then I end up with a second meal for me or them too.... By the time I am done cooking, I could care less about eating.. That is if I am up to cooking.... I feel incredibly guilty if I man not feeling up to cooking... My soon to be ex husband used to give me a real hard time about that. He felt that since I didn't work and he did, that I should take care of everything and I did my best with him never pitching in.... At all.... Then he would put me down about my weight.... I was overweight when we met...he knew what he was getting... Lol. He really tried to push me into having the gastric, but with all my medical conditions, I wasn't willing to do something that invasive.. With auto immune disorders and pain disorders, having that surgery really could have a made me worse.... After he left I found out about the sleeve... I didn't know it existed.. I think that others thought I did it because of him... But he had nothing to do in thigh my decision. I had to make the choice for me.

Oh... And I know that this isn't much, but... One of the small changes I have made is that I do my darnedest not to use the motorized cart at stores anymore.... Unless I am in incredible unbearable pain, I walk... Small change I know, but it is something.

Thank you both for your suggestions and encouragement. I needed it.

I am sorry for your current predicament, sincerely. Sounds like you're going through it, all at once, and I'm sure you're feeling overwhelmed. I agree with Butterfly; you need to set yourself up a routine. I do not have any experience with disabilities, but I do know about the other matters. You need to prioritise. Work out what's most important - which at this stage, is your health. Use the alarm system to ensure you're eating at least 3 meals a day. Up your calorie content. Make sure the food you are eating is nutritious and easily assembled. (No one needs the hassle of trying to conjure up Michellin starred food every day!). As with the set mealtimes - set a little gentle exercise time every day. Even its a little bit of stretching - just to get the blood flowing. When you build your strength with good nutrition, the rest will follow - including a bit of mental peace and emotional stability. You're not an island unto yourself. I know it's tough, but little steps every day and you'll be back on top in no time. Let us know how you get on. x

You both are right.. I need a routine... That way, I get in the swing of things..

Eating three times a day and eating enough is an issue.... I just don't care about eating and I am not hungry.. I could go all day every day with not eating or eating once. I don't eat a lot either... One or two bites and I am done. I know what you mean about food though,,, I try and make my family stuff that they like and then I end up with a second meal for me or them too.... By the time I am done cooking, I could care less about eating.. That is if I am up to cooking.... I feel incredibly guilty if I man not feeling up to cooking... My soon to be ex husband used to give me a real hard time about that. He felt that since I didn't work and he did, that I should take care of everything and I did my best with him never pitching in.... At all.... Then he would put me down about my weight.... I was overweight when we met...he knew what he was getting... Lol. He really tried to push me into having the gastric, but with all my medical conditions, I wasn't willing to do something that invasive.. With auto immune disorders and pain disorders, having that surgery really could have a made me worse.... After he left I found out about the sleeve... I didn't know it existed.. I think that others thought I did it because of him... But he had nothing to do in thigh my decision. I had to make the choice for me.

Oh... And I know that this isn't much, but... One of the small changes I have made is that I do my darnedest not to use the motorized cart at stores anymore.... Unless I am in incredible unbearable pain, I walk... Small change I know, but it is something.

Thank you both for your suggestions and encouragement. I needed it.

Its a great change and one you should be very proud of.

As for the rest of it; take each challenge in small chunks. What your husband did or thought is now irrelevant.

You are the queen of your domain and without the negativity raining down on you, you can achieve whatever it is you want to.

Little steps and you'll have climbed this mountain in no time

Natalie, congratulations on reaching out for help. There are so many people here who will be supportive and help you through your journey. Remember it is a journey, and it doesn't really matter how long it takes you to get to your goal as long as you are heading in the right direction. Right now you need to visualize your path.

Try not to think of everything you need/want to do at once. You say you have a lot on your plate. For me, making lists works great. Write down everything you need to do. The list doesn't need to be complete, you can add to it whenever you think of something else. Prioritize them as high, medium or low. Eating your meals and moving a few minutes should be on that list. Check off the things you do every day, and aim to do three things other than your meals and exercise each day. That's really more than enough. By writing things down in your list, you can release them from your mind and stop worrying about them, because you know you won't forget them.

I took a class once in time management that taught me the more you put structure in your life the more freedom you have. I try writing everything i have to do in my daily calendar, and i mean EVERYTHING, like cooking and eating, going to the library to return books, having dinner with a friend... there are only so many time slots in a day, and this will help you from overbooking yourself. Make sure you schedule in time for you to just relax and do nothing.

You will make it! I have every confidence in you. Take a deep breath, and pull out your pen and paper and start making your list. And come back here and interact often. You're not alone!

Thank you both so much for your encouragement. Tomorrow is my divorce hearing.... I am shaking in my boots so to say (not that I wear boots… LOL ) ... I am hoping and praying that once I get this particular obstacle behind me, I'll be able to start to make plans and MoveOn one day at a time… i'm just hoping to go in with my head held high and it's at least show the perception of strength even though I worried or concerned underneath.

again, thank you all for your encouragement. It is greatly appreciated and hopefully we can be a sense of encouragement for one another.

Blessings, Natalie