It's funny. Before my surgery, the vast majority of the comments I received about my plans was negative. "Why would you do that?" "I have a (friend/relative/etc) who had the surgery and (insert bad outcome)" "You don't look big enough to need it." "I could never do that to myself." etc.

Hence I decided not to tell anyone at work. Now that I'm back from my leave and visibly thinner, I have had nothing but positive feedback. "You look fantastic!" "It's not just your size, you just look happier!" "Can you tell me more about it? I've always been interested in getting it." etc.

Most of all, I've been a little overwhelmed by the kindness others have shown me, and by their support. And I honestly am surprised that I look happier and more confident. I can't tell you how often I get this.

Anyway, just had to share.

Cecilia, like you I did not tell anyone at work either. I just had my surgery on Weds and am planning to go back to work in 2 weeks but am not sure what to say when people start noticing. My family knows and I have good support but I don't feel that it's everyone else's business either. I just don't want people worrying that I'm "sick". I had been making changes since January and people noticed that I was eating less carbs, more salad and proteins and I was having the Atkins shakes so hopefully they will just think I'm doing really well on my diet but it will start coming off very quickly now . . . . not sure how to respond when coworkers make comments.

I'm pretty open with most people about my weight struggles. When I got my band I wasn't so open. Within 2 or 3 months pretty much the entire community knew. (Funny story,one of my sweetest elderly gentlemen came in one day and was complementing me on how great I look and how proud of me he was for getting the surgery....I asked him how on earth he knew and he said he'd been down at one of the car dealerships here in town talking about me with another older gent who is also one of my patients, they were worried cuz I'd lost so much weight when a third patient who was also a close personal friend of my nurse caught the conversation and told them not to worry, that I'd had a lap-band...and they say women gossip!!!!).

Anyway, as I lost weight and patients started to hear about it I got to where I'd tell em almost anything, the good and the bad. As life with a band collapsed I chose to stay open with them. My co-workers have been in on all of it from the beginning and have been amazing. I couldn't ask for more support. What has really cracked me up is my patients though. As the weeks have passed and the comments have started I have started telling them what I've had done. I've had a few tell me horror stories and a couple give me the 'you weren't big enough to do that' speech,but the vast majority have been nothing short of fabulous. Gotta love small town life!!!

HW 312, pre-op (lap-band) 294, pre-op (RNY) 255, surgery date 2/11/13, goal weight 154, current weight 225

I only told my VERY close work friends and they were 110% supportive. The rest of the work population when they ask "did you lose weight - you look great" I say thanks and they ask how, I say diet and exercise. I just feel my personal medical choices are really no ones business and the people I do chose to tell are very close to me and respect my decisions etc.

I went ahead and told everyone. I had a few that weren't all that supportive...*one is the girl that slathers peanut butter between two eggos and eats it like a sandwich before starting on her poptarts. She eats constantly and had the nerve to say weight loss is all about discipline. Pfft. Like she'd KNOW* I don't really care how supportive they are. If they have something nice to say, good. If not, forget about them. I'm not huge on caring what others opinions are in relation to me. Comes from being large all my life. Their opinion isn't any better when I'm fat.

With my band I only told my closest friends and relatives. I did not want anyone to know. Now I am getting close to my bypass and I have told everyone and they are surprised to hear I have the band and that I had it for 2 years without telling anyone. Of course I will still not tell someone like from high school if I run into them randomly, because I have been able to avoid people from then after I gained weight, but after I lose the weight, I don't want them to ever know I was fat.

With my band I only told my closest friends and relatives. I did not want anyone to know. Now I am getting close to my bypass and I have told everyone and they are surprised to hear I have the band and that I had it for 2 years without telling anyone. Of course I will still not tell someone like from high school if I run into them randomly' date=' because I have been able to avoid people from then after I gained weight, but after I lose the weight, I don't want them to ever know I was fat.[/quote']

I was fat in high school so no worries there . I actually weight now what I did when I graduated 22 years ago....that's just sad.

I was 145lbs when I graduated high school in 2006 here I am 7 years later and a little over 100 lbs heavier. I gained weight very quickly when I moved out of my parents. My dad's side is all very large people and they all gained the weight when hey turned 18 so I fell into that. My mom was always yoyo dieting and had my family on one with her growing up, but when she would break it she would bring home cake and icecream and nachos for dinner, and it was awesome. So when I moved out, I just ate the awesome foods...

Cecilia, like you I did not tell anyone at work either. I just had my surgery on Weds and am planning to go back to work in 2 weeks but am not sure what to say when people start noticing. My family knows and I have good support but I don't feel that it's everyone else's business either. I just don't want people worrying that I'm "sick". I had been making changes since January and people noticed that I was eating less carbs, more salad and Proteins and I was having the Atkins shakes so hopefully they will just think I'm doing really well on my diet but it will start coming off very quickly now . . . . not sure how to respond when coworkers make comments.

Here's the way it went for me:

"You're losing weight!"

"I am!"

"How did you do it?"

"I had surgery. Plus a ton of exercise."

"You look fabulous!" or "I always wondered about that surgery..." or "Did insurance pay for it?" or "You look fabulous!"

Nothing but positives!

C

Here's the way it went for me:

"You're losing weight!"

"I am!"

"How did you do it?"

"I had surgery. Plus a ton of exercise."

"You look fabulous!" or "I always wondered about that surgery..." or "Did insurance pay for it?" or "You look fabulous!"

Nothing but positives!

C

Very similar experience, a lot of curiosity, and even more kudos. It's been awesome.

HW 312, pre-op (lap-band) 294, pre-op (RNY) 255, surgery date 2/11/13, goal weight 154, current weight 225

Very similar experience, a lot of curiosity, and even more kudos. It's been awesome.

HW 312, pre-op (lap-band) 294, pre-op (RNY) 255, surgery date 2/11/13, goal weight 154, current weight 225

Seriously. What she said. I had so much fear about telling people, because my early experiences (telling before surgery) and my own self-doubt ("I could have done it without surgery if I just tried harder," and "all these people have seen me at office parties and they know I hit the pizza and Desserts pretty hard.") were not good. But nobody could say that I'm just using the surgery to be able to pig out and still lose weight. They see me eat three bites of my lunch and be done. They see on Facebook that I'm running a race next month...

I hope this helps. And FWIW, I have been told that there may come a point where people will wonder if I really need to lose more weight or might tell me I look "too thin," but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. Just remind people you're not wasting away from cancer, LOL!

Thus surgery is such a judgmental and controversal topic... I HATE THIS! This is the reason I'm attending Easter dinner at my grandmothers house 1.5 hours away and I'm not even 2 weeks post op. But... I wanted to be the one to tell my entire "nosey Ass" family and explain why I did it and let them see visually that I'm just fine. Also I wanted to open the lines of communication for them to ask any questions and so be able to educate them. I'm hoping it will eliminate gossip and ignorant opinions of this surgery. We'll see... This could also back fire on me and I can feel like I'm on the national debate team tomorrow. My last rebuttal will be about how I was the one with X, Y, Z and 1, 2, 3 elements not you!!!

~Leticia **HW: 259**PreOp: 216**SURG: 3/21/13 **Discharged @: 221**8 days post op: Down 19 lbs**

I told my in-laws yesterday. A few of them were happy because I was happy, but my husband aunt kind of attacked me that I'm too young to make permanent changes to my body like that. I told her I feel completely justified. I may be 24, but my relatives are dying before the age of 50 due to obesity related health issues. So to me I am halfway through my life and I am not happy with that. When I explained that and the medical conditions I have she seemed to understand more.

I told my in-laws yesterday. A few of them were happy because I was happy, but my husband aunt kind of attacked me that I'm too young to make permanent changes to my body like that. I told her I feel completely justified.

I'm so glad she was nicer after.

i lost friends because of weightloss. A lot were against it said I was stupid etc. others who see me now assume I'm a drug addict or I figured out bulemia (i laugh hysterically at the assumptions) I had a good friend who was my surgery buddy and she just couldn't quiet get the diet down and never lost as much as me and got hateful and nasty towards me. It's so funny you spend ur life being judged for being fat and suddenly when ur thin your also judged. I realized a few years ago ppl are gonna hate on me til I die and its nothing I can change so why should I care. hold ur head up and just nod and grin and laugh on the inside...ur driving the karma bus now babe enjoy it. lol .

It's funny. Before my surgery' date=' the vast majority of the comments I received about my plans was negative. "Why would you do that?" "I have a (friend/relative/etc) who had the surgery and (insert bad outcome)" "You don't look big enough to need it." "I could never do that to myself." etc.

Hence I decided not to tell anyone at work. Now that I'm back from my leave and visibly thinner, I have had nothing but positive feedback. "You look fantastic!" "It's not just your size, you just look happier!" "Can you tell me more about it? I've always been interested in getting it." etc.

Most of all, I've been a little overwhelmed by the kindness others have shown me, and by their support. And I honestly am surprised that I look happier and more confident. I can't tell you how often I get this.

Anyway, just had to share.[/quote']

I totally understand! I have told 2 friends and only my husband and sister know. Everyone else is sooo judgmental! It is always "you can lose the weight if you just tried!" Like I haven't tried everything under the sun. What is really bad is I know that my in-laws are going to be very disapproving, and some of them live in my home and still don't know what I am having done. They only know that I am having a "hormonal issue" fixed. I feel like it is none of their business, and it is not like they will help or do any of the work required to lose the weight. It is also sort of tough because my husband doesn't fully understand the whole change that it encompasses. I have made changes prior to surgery, and changed the eating habits of everyone in the house. The entire family is losing wright. It won't seem as out of place when I am dropping so much.