yesterday i went in for my last pre op battery of tests. Esophogeal manometry went horrible. I vomitted continuously till I was spitting up blood 4 x. The surgeon was frustrated and said "I won't do it without the manometry". As I sat that in pain, crying, I thought, "why am I doing this?" What if something goes wrong? How can I be so pathetic?

I have 2 small children and have always been overweight but 8 years ago my weight ballooned when unbeknowsted to me and the medical community i developed a hormone secreting brain tumor. I survived that but have been unable to take off anymore weight 320/268/180.

I am so afraid that i will end up worse off. I have horrible luck and so far everything has been difficult or "srewed up" in this process. My EKg came back abnormal, then It was the machine was falting. the manometry as above, My Dr- Dr horgan, left UIC with no warning so know it is another doc Dr Ayloo.....one thing after another.

I feel cursed. What do I do? I want the surgery, I want to loose this weight but am I taking to high of a risk?

I haven't slept well in 2 days...:think

"Success is found not in achievement of a goal, but the journey towards it"

Like "YOU" said... It's a journey, and you will be sucessful! Just take it slow and try and relax some. Do it for your children, loosing the weight will make you more healthy to be there for them and watch them grow up. I will be praying for you. Best of luck!

That is really rough. I'm sorry. Hang in there, the band could be the thing you've been waiting for.

Well, I have decided to cancel my surgery for now. I will wait until Dr Galvanni is accredited. I felt comfortable with him and it should just be a few months. Thanks

Natalie

Natalie, you were right to cancel it, sometimes we just have to listen to that inner voice, or go with our gut feeling. Best of luck