So I was sleeved on Feb 8th. My mom is in town to take care of me but at the same time I want her to have a nice time. My mom is really good at putting my needs first and taking care of me. My boyfriend last night asked me if I could get his phone charger. Mind you I was already in bed and it's super hard to get up from bed cause of abdominal pain. I said ok thinking he was just kidding, he wasn't. Now luckily I have brought juice and water on our "outing" but I really want some broth. I am hungry. He decides to overrule my Panera choice (I was planning on having the chicken noodle broth) by going to a hamburger joint. I have to sit here and stare at them eat... Once again... Did this yesterday... I am starting to lose my patience with him. I don't wanna blow up but I might.

Communicate your feelings to him clearly. If he doesn't change, he's not going to...and it will get worse with time, not better. When someone really loves you they show it. Love is an action word.

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

YOU DESERVE TO BE LOVED. YOU ARE WORTH IT...hugs!

Communicate your feelings to him clearly. If he doesn't change, he's not going to...and it will get worse with time, not better. When someone really loves you they show it. Love is an action word.

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

YOU DESERVE TO BE LOVED. YOU ARE WORTH IT...hugs!

Amen!!!

I had the opposite thing going on. I had to convince my husband more than once that's it okay to bring pizza home and okay to eat in front of me. Now we pretty much eat the same and he will give me a bit of food from his plate if we go out. My daughter will do that too.

Others are right. Have that talk. Tell him what you need and watch what happens. It's not always about you, but he needs to be cognizant about the difficulties are are experiencing.

I have always thought it was a load of crap that a guy just "doesn't realize" - then i realized, that sometimes they don't. Some people, both men and women don't pay attention to the details. Some people, unless something causes them direct pleasure or pain, do not get the details. My husband has been one of them for a long time. That has changed a lot over the past year. Looking at his family, I get why he's been that way - and I never gave him a reason to turn into an adult. I did all the detail thinking and planning. Until about a year ago. Does he need reminders? Yup, but he's gotten a lot better about it. If he hadn't, I'd be single

I'm glad you stood up for yourself. I hope he just had an obliviousness to your situation- just don't expect perfection overnight

..just how did he overule you?

I probably would have told him see u later going to panera!

You should probably be asking yourself why you allowed him to overule you in a situation like this.

I agree with what alot of people are saying. 1) guys, or even just people who don't understand the surgery, just don't get it. When I had mine I laid down ground rules (no eating in front of me for a while and while I'm recovering he needs to do the house chores and take care of me) and was totally honest and POINT BLANK about what I needed/wanted. If I don't tell him, he wouldn't know, and its not right to be upset with him if he's actually just clueless. 2) if this is all understood by him and he refuses to accept it and help you then it IS his fault and he IS truly being insensitive.

But also nobody has said this yet (unless I skimmed over it) but when I was losing I was soooooooooooooooooooo hormonal. I've heard alot of people say they got hormonal when they lose weight because the fat kind of suspends excess hormones and when the fat breaks down the hormones are released. I'd get mad at my husband only to realize later it was over nothing. Hormones are crazy. So whenever I thought he was being rude or insensitive I made it a point to really ask myself if he was actually being a jerk or if it was my hormones twisting a situation.