Is it bad that I secretly hope I end up getting a BFP (positive pregnancy test) before my surgery?? :001_tt2:

Edited June 8, 201016 yr by songbird_kay

Getting a what?

sorry, i assumed people would know what it meant. BFP=big fat pisitive. meaning a positive pregnancy test

Are you having second thoughts about your surgery? Why would you want a positive preg test that might sabotage the surgery? Did you know you can still have babies after you get sleeved?

no, I Am not having second thoughts. It is just that I have been trying to have a baby with my husband for 3.5 years and a piece of me still wishes I could get that ever elusive BFP w/o having to go through surgery. ultimately I want to be healthy before being pregnant for a LOT of reasons. but would i be THRILLED if I ended up pregnant? yes. although I would also be disappointed about losing the chance to have the sleeve as well.

it definitely is a conflict in my heart, if you can understand that.

oh, and of course i know i can get PG after surgery.... that is one of the biggest points in me having the surgery :001_tt2:

I prayed I wouldn't end up pregnant before my surgery. My husband was deploying and I made sure that we used 2 forms of birth control before he left just to ensure that I would not end up pregnant. I refused to get pregnant when I was fat, and I sure wasn't going to do when I was having issues with my band, and knowing that I was going to have to revise to VSG.

It just wasn't worth it to me. Just to let you know, I've been cleared by my surgeon and PCP to TTC. We've been not preventing for the last 3 months. Nothing exciting to report yet, but my body is still adjusting, and I figure it's on God's time, not ours.

I don't think it is crazy at all - dealing with the same issues myself. My husband really wanted us to try a cycle per my prior post so we will do one and if it isn't successful, I will get the sleeve before trying again. I really wish I could do what I need to do long term without the surgery - I think we all want that. But over the last year, I realized (even before exploring surgery) that I will never be able to eat what is typically considered "normal" - everything in moderation. I have too many trigger foods that I cannot control if I have them and they ultimately lead to more bad choices. So to me now, the changes in eating that's required with the sleeve is what I would need to do anyway. The sleeve just provides the tool to be successful at it (the most important thing to me in the world right now didn't even give me the help I needed to lose the weight by myself). I will do this surgery - either before pregnancy or after, because I want to be healthy and model healthy behaviors for my future children. One of the biggest gifts I truly believe I can give them is the help them be healthy and make healthy choices for themselves. I will give ANYTHING (including 85% of my stomach :biggrin0:) for that.

If it happens naturally, then its Gods plan. But I have had so many friends go through pregnancy overweight and they wish they would have been thinner. I myself have been TTC for 6 years. So a BFP would be a blessing for sure. But I think if that came along, Im not sure I could follow through with the surgery after the baby was born. Me personally, take care of yourself and your health and then have a baby. I have made peace with this plan, knowing it would be better for my baby to have a healthy mom.

Best wishes.

thanks guys. the chances of me getting PG are VERY slim since it is not only my issues but severe male factor as well. I guess there will always be this bit of hope in my heart.

I am in the same boat after dealing with infertility for the last 3.5 years and I am 100% commited to surgery. For the first time in 6 years we are using condoms and it is super weird...

I am dreading a bfp before surgery....

My husband and I have also been trying for over 3 years, and I am 28. I have not had any children, and want one more than one can imagine. I had the sleeve done 3 weeks ago, and have lost a total of almost 30 lbs. I understand your struggle, but having done some research, it is more likely to get pg after surgery, not to mention your child is less likely to have the weight problems that I am sure we all have struggled with our entire lives. That to me is worth not having any of my favorite foods ever again (and yes, I realize that I can have some of them...just emphasizing the point). We even did an IVF with ICSI that did not work, so I completly understand your point...you always wish for that BFP. Just know that you are understood here. Best of luck with your surgery!!! and eventually that baby!!!

i can honestly say i hear you and i feel you on this one. i am going for my surgeon consult on the 6th and should be setting a surgery date that day. i am not preventing pregnancy in any way until after the surgery. i doubt it will happen but hey, it isn't unheard of.

now...do i want to be healthier before i try to carry a child? absolutely, that's was one of the major deciding factors for me in going through with this finally. but if it happened for us before the surgery after not preventing it for 2 years now, would i regret it? probably not. i think i would consider it a miracle and a sign. but i know i would still have the surgery afterwards. after all, it's still about MY overall health.

good luck in your journey!