Okay ladies I've been slacking about writing down my food intake...so have been tyring this week to do it. I've noticed a couple of things. I eat a heck alot of tofu and yogurt and I need to step away from the animal crackers...who knew I was eating so many...obviously not me! LOL Anyway if anyone has time to look in on my food diary for the last few days I'd appreciate it. I have to decide if I should cancel the fill scheduled and just work myself harder...or if the fill would be benificial. Just a warning Sunday was terrible as far as food choices go...but after I got stuck on the burrito (first couple bite as I only had 4 bites) I let myself have starbucks and part of a carmel apple. Someone slap me LOL.

Follow the link in the sig to see the food diary.

thanks

I am sitting here crying over food, and I had promised myself I would never let any diet or plan do that to me again. My nutrionist asked me to email her my food diary. I feel like everything I'm doing is wrong. I'm not suppouse to have anything with sugar or more than 20 g of fat in a day on top of everything else. I can't do this. I worked out today....ellipitcal burned 600 calories according to the machine (tends to be a bit on the higher side probally)...but I haven't even ate 600 calories today. I'm canceling the fill for tomorrow. I don't need it i don't think. It took me almost 45 minutes to eat 120 calorie micowave meal today. But I don't know what to do. I can't do it her way, and my way isn't working.

Well, I'm just the babe in the woods, but are you hungry? I was going to say really hungry, but maybe truly hungry is a better word. Even the slightest bit hungry, what is it, 3 or 4 hrs after you eat? If so, get the fill. After all, isnt this what the fills are supposed to do?

Oh and the nutritionist told me that I could lose 100lbs in 6 months on lapband. Does this not scare anyone?

She seems like she has her expectations rather high for the Lapband since its not malabsorbtive.

Am I being a brat about that too? I thought the whole thing for Lapband was slower loss? Thats an RNY number right there if I ever saw one.

How is the thyroid stuff going?

WOW.....100lbs in six months!! Im down 86lbs in 1 1/2......my goal was 130lbs lost....so im still working a 1 1/2 later.....that does seem much, but I guess we are all different....I know Im willing to learn to eat better but Im not going to cut all the good stuff out completly..if so we wouldnt need the band......you have to learn moderation for sure....I know I dont eat like I did pre-band, but I also dont always do protein and veggies....

Melissa....Melissa...I can hear your pain. Girl you are being to hard on youself! You just beating your self up to much. So down a second. If your hungry you should go for the fill. I think wven if your not hungry you should go for the fill. This is not easy but it also shouldn't be so horribly hard. It sounds to me that you are thinking scale thoughts and numbers 24-7 Am I right?

You know a lot of my personal story and history with stuff. I learned so much when I was in the eating disorder hospital.

I would love to meet up with you so we can talk. Call me if you'd like to. We can meet over by the Pineville Mall if you want. I'm free today and most of tomorrow.

Big HUGS I know it stinks sometimes. But I know you can do it!

Love ya

Melissa -

I'm here too if you need me. I just wanted to add that I have lost 50lbs, but not the urge to eat. I know we have to be realistic, some people lose faster then other and we cannot live by the food pyramid, or all the starbucks and ice cream and donut joints would close up.

I am wondering if you need to up your calories a bit since your working out so hard. I just don't know. I wish I could fix it for you, because you deserve to be happy. I'm finally enjoying my weightloss, but I lost one of my close friends over all things, jealousy. She's mad at me for losing weight. Go Figure.

It's ok for Jen to have a stroke because her blood presse is 160/110 but I'd rather be envious. How stupid. Plus she did something mean to my princess daughter.

Did you get carowinds passes? WE could always hang out there, I would enjoy the company. My daughter talks so much, she needs to meet her match.

Jennifer

Wavy....I remember in my first meeting with Diane her telling me that we could eat just like an rny patient and loose just as much. I rebelled at the thought then. I thnk I called Kim all upset if I'm remembering right.

I did go ahead and get the fill today....liquids for the next 3 days. I did tell the nurse how I felt so stressed by the whole counting every part of every calorie..meaning counting the fat the Protein, the carbs, the sugar...and how I cried yesterday about it. She says she has asked Diane for advice and that Diane lives what she preaches. She even joked that she has seen her count out how many carrots she can eat in a serving. I joked that I consider carrots a free food and she said, so did she! lol I was able to laugh about it today...but I still don't see how I can LIVE and loose weight that way. This was one of the whole reasons I chose the band over the rny. So guess I'm being a brat about it too LOL.

Part of my last fill was missing in action. I had gotten 1.5 cc's last time, but only 1 cc was there. He said that explained why I didn't feel must restriction. I asked if that meant a leak, but he didnt' think so, he says it happens sometimes with the first fill. I have 2 cc's now. He made me drink a glass of Water...asked how I felt. I felt like I might have to burb...so he made me drink another whole glass just to make sure. I can defiently feel a little something just with liquids, so guess when I start solids back I will defiently feel something.

Diane I do tend to be a bit obssesive when I'm focused. I'm trying to be focused, making sure I follow the rules. I'm an all or nothing type of gal. If everything doesn't fit right into the boxes I have, I kinda freak and say what the heck why bother. I dont' want to do that with the band...this has GOT to stick for me. I NEED to loose this weight this time, I can't accept another failure. But I almost feel like the nutritionist expects too much from me and I just can't seem to measure up. That jumble of explianation make any sense to anyone? Anyway, not as depressed and downhearted as yesterday...still not cheerful, but working on it.

Melissa you are correct you did call me after that meeting w/ Diane. Isn't funny about the things we remember.

Girl You are making my heart ache just reading this. Don't beat yourself up..remeber the months of Nov and Dec I think I actually gained 2 pounds. That is when I started having port problems. But it's ok to have a stall. You are dedicated to it and you make it happen. We are here to help you!!! If you need me you know where to find me. If I can pull myself away from desk I can meet you for lunch or a walk in the park.

Hey we are having our first Lap-Band support group meeting on June 5th. It's the first monday of the month. We are going to have a personal trainer there if you are interested. I am hoping alot of ya'll can make it. It's open to anyone and everyone. :eek: We are going to get a nutritionist there for one. We have alot of good plans and Bobbie (one of our nurses) is going to lead and she great. She has a wealth of knowledge.

Good Luck gril and keep posting away we are all hear for you!!!

I was told the 100 lbs. in 6 months thing too at my first meeting with Diane. I knew it wasn't likely when I heard it, and I KNOW FOR SURE it's not true now. I guess if you ate exactly like a RNY patient it would happen, but that's not gonna happen with me. That's part of the reason I chose the band in the first place. I don't want to lose it that fast, and I can't eat like that even with good restriction, like I think I have now. I would be majorly hungry all the time. I feel very blessed to have lost the measly 65 lbs. that I have lost so far.

With that being said, I have not lost any since the first of MARCH!!! I cannot believe that, and I am totally upset about it. I know I haven't made the best food choices, but it seems like there is no way I would be eating enough calories to NOT lose weight. I mean, you have a certain amount of calories you would have to have to maintain your body weight, right? It just doesn't seem possible that I am eating more than that. But, what do I know?

I just want you to know Melissa that I know what you are feeling. While I know the way I'm feeling is only temporary, it's still no fun and a little scary. I have a long way to go, and it's too soon to start slowing down now.:phanvan

Thanks everyone I've been feeling much better. Surpising my boss at work was so supportive. She said, "People always think having weight loss surgery is the easy way out, and I know how hard you have worked" It just made me feel so good that she undrstood a bit. Ya know.

Tomorrow I have the church retreat thing. I am going to take my protien shake and yogurt and enjoy myself while everyone else eats hotdogs. I'm surpisingly fine with that.

The scale is moving again...so that always helps.

Way to go Melissa - Do us bandsters proud w/ PS and yogurt. I know those are on the top of my list. :eek:

A patient brought me in some samples of some PS she likes to use. If I like them I will post what they are she brought me like 8 different samples - one is called strawberry White Choclate. It has little strawberry peices in it. I can't wait to try it...that is tomorrow as I head out to the many yard sales.