I opened up a new topic because I think our fears are important to share. I know right now most of us are pre-surgery but I have a feeling we'll all be facing our fears a lot over the next several months. I hope you feel comfortable enough on here to express them here.

from my blog:

Fears

I've been thinking a lot about my fears this week. Probably because my friends on the forum are expressing theirs which is wonderful. One, I believe it's good to put it out there and secondly, it's hearing things from a different point of view. So this has me looking into my own fears about my upcoming surgery.

Will I be in pain? Of course, but I've dealt with pain before and as long as I know it won't last long I seem to be ok. Just leave me alone and let me deal with it. I'll have to remind my friend of "leave me alone" during of my recovery. When I'm in a lot of pain I don't even like being spoken to. Hopefully I will be able to sleep through most of it the first few days.

What if they screw up and I have complications? What is I die? Well how can I control that? I can't. I've done my research and even though I haven't met him in person yet, I feel pretty confident about my surgeon. Has great reviews all over everywhere and have been accredited by the American Medical Association. So I could make myself sick of him messing up but I think the odds are in my favor. What if I die? NOT that I have a death wish, but I'm ok with that too. If it's my time, it's my time. I could get hit by a bus tomorrow.

What if I fail? Ok so I saved my biggest fear for last. What if I fail the lap band? I'm spending 5K on this surgery and it may not be the smartest financial move I've made but here's the thing. What if I don't? I fear that far more than I fear getting banded and failing. If I don't I know I will continue to gain weight. Get less and less mobile and will just spiral downward. I know myself well enough to know I will blame my weight on everything and will turn to food to help with my depression. I've been doing that for years. Yep, I'm an emotional eater. I can do really well all day and let myself get into my own head and eat an entire box of cookies, or a huge bowl of ice cream and then feel like crap for doing so. My eating is out of control and I'm a smart enough woman to know I need help. So I guess a better question for me is, what if I fail not to? What happens to me if I don't get banded? That right there is a scary future and that's something I can control!!

That's real!

j~

Regarding hairloss: This was my first fear. In one of the many LB support group meetings I have attended I asked the group of about 30: If you can honestly say you met your daily protein requirements did you still experience hairloss? The crowd roared back "yes"! The comments I got back were:

* it's not immediate, it begins several months after surgery

* it's more of a thinning that occurs

* it does grow back

* CRITICAL to get 60-80 grams/ day. Remember your body cannot process more than 40 grams protein at a time.

*. Many recommended biotin. NOTE: upon questioning, many admitted they did not take biotin (they didnt know about it) OR they started biotin once they started losing hair.

Yet, on the other hand I have talked to several ladies who did not experience any hairloss.

So, I have concluded that I will do the best I can. I will meet my daily protein requirement and begin Biotin now. I have long, thick hair. If I begin losing, I plan to cut my hair to shoulder length and trust that the thickness will return with healthy and nutritional eating.

Thank you for the information about hair loss and Biotin.

I fear the feeling of defeat. Intellectually I know that isnt the case..but I'm a very competitive person and feel that I should be able to do this on my own....yet, I have not been able to. I did lose 90 lbs in 1992 but gained it all back and lost 60 lbs in 2005 and gained it back.. So i see lapband as a way to lose it and permanently keep it off. Losing and gaining is not healthy....and gaining and keeping it on is not healthy.. So this is how I have come to the conclusion that I must go thru with WLS.

I feel the same way you do. In January, as I was sitting in my surgeon's waiting area, I was analyzing how I ended up there and questioning why I couldn't do it on my own. This probably bugs me far more than it should. The most bothersome part is that while I devote a lot of time and effort to managing my weight, I have only very brief periods of success. On most days, I am able to manage all of the other aspects of my life fairly well with not nearly as much effort. Therefore, I see the band as a tool I need, and surgery is the only way I can obtain it.

I feel the same way you do. In January, as I was sitting in my surgeon's waiting area, I was analyzing how I ended up there and questioning why I couldn't do it on my own. This probably bugs me far more than it should. The most bothersome part is that while I devote a lot of time and effort to managing my weight, I have only very brief periods of success. On most days, I am able to manage all of the other aspects of my life fairly well with not nearly as much effort. Therefore, I see the band as a tool I need, and surgery is the only way I can obtain it.

I came to that same conclusion ElizabethAnne and I have decided to stop focusing so much on why I can't do it on my own and be thankful that I can get this tool and concentrate on working the tool to be successful this time. We must stop beating ourselves over the past and look to making the bandland future bright!

lol this reminds me of a quote I heard once......... sorta crude but funny too.

If you have one foot in yesterday and one foot in tomorrow what other choice do you have but to pee on your day?

Right now I think I'm making myself too busy running forward to give it much thought anymore which BTW is my biggest fear. I dont' deal well in gray (indecision), so I make quick decisions and don't always think it through as much as I should. HOWEVER, somehow I always seems to land on my feet.

I'm blessed and humble,

Julie

I have decided to stop focusing so much on why I can't do it on my own and be thankful that I can get this tool and concentrate on working the tool to be successful this time. We must stop beating ourselves over the past and look to making the bandland future bright!

GLove,

You possess kind of healthy attitude toward weight management that I attempt to adopt daily. I'm an optimist by nature and am normally able to move on. Therefore, I am not sure why I feel the need to analyze this repeatedly. Maybe because problem-solving is effective in other aspects of my life, and unconsciously, I believe I can find a solution if I continue to persevere.

Hello Springers...this is my first post Not really sure how this works, but I'll give it a shot! I am planning to have my surgery late April. I have #6 of my dietician appointments left to do on April 2nd then they will submit it to my insurance for approval...I pray it goes through!

I am worried and fearful to have this surgery done, but I think I'm more afraid of staying obese and I am horrified to think about what my life will be like in 10 or even 20 years if I don't fix this now! I think this is so great having a forum like this to discuss are concerns, I wish I would of found this 6 months ago! I look forward to our journey together. Good luck to all of you!

HI Lap band Blondie... Glad you found out little group Looking forward to gettting to know you better.

Deb

what if I don't lose enough before surgery?

no bueno

what if I don't lose enough before surgery?

no bueno

Do you have a weight loss requirement in order to have surgery? If you do, as motivated as you are right now, you will reach that goal. I believe in you!

My insurance approval letter said nothing about a weight loss requirement prior to surgery and neither did my surgeon. I have read, though, that some surgeons do require a specific number of pounds to be lost during the pre-surgery diet. The paperwork I received from my surgeon last week indicates I will be following a 1400 calorie diet. On 1400 calories, I will lose very little if any, but I am hoping they will lower the calories to 1000 so I can keep trying to lose.

Yes I have to be down 10 lbs but I'm heard they aren't too strict about it.

thank you

I'm also afraid of heights.

 

Just thoughts I would put something out here that DOESN'T have to do with our surgeries. Like I don't want having this surgery to completely consume me like it has been lately. My excess is just a part of who I am, not all of me. Does that make any sense.

 

Ok, maybe not. I'm going to clean out the shed.

I'm also afraid of heights.

Just thoughts I would put something out here that DOESN'T have to do with our surgeries. Like I don't want having this surgery to completely consume me like it has been lately. My excess is just a part of who I am, not all of me. Does that make any sense.

Ok, maybe not. I'm going to clean out the shed.

Good idea. I'm obsessed with surgery right now and the only way I can keep my mind off of it is to keep super busy.

It makes sense to me, Julie, and I wonder if we are focusing on this so much because we're mentally ready to proceed, yet physically we are in waiting mode until it's our turn.

I'm afraid of heights sometimes (like when I am hiking a trail without a guardrail and can see how far down I could possibly fall), but fortunately, most of the time, my fear isn't paralyzing. However, I am even more afraid of mice, which I know is completely illogical...LOL.

LOL well i am scared of heights and mice. When my boy was like 12 and 10 We lived in cali and i had my front door open in ran a little kangroo mouse I paniced JUMPED on my couch started yelling and my 2 little boys had to come save mom.. LOL we still laugh bout it.

This is fun.

I'm only afraid of heights when driving up a mountain. I can hardly stand it.

My biggest fear is flying. I can't do it. I used to fly all of the time. Now it's a full blown phobia. I have been on planes and had to get off, and someone once tried to drag me on. Drugs and alcohol did not work, and I also tried hypnosis. Airplanes in the sky make my throat close up too. I know, I'm weird.

oh I forgot hair loss!!! I do NOT want to lose my hair!!!

 

Ordered my biotin today....... thank you Glove!

How much biotin is recommended per day?