Honest question here.......

Not sure how to word this so I will just type and hope it does not come off too wrong.

I am not an unattractive over weight. I get the side looks from the women when out in public, I keep myself dressed well, good charisma, can still rock a sleeve less shirt and show off the guns, confident etc...

I am getting banded as I am just to old to keep playing football and the weight is affecting my martial arts (which is the only hobby i have left). I want to have a better quality and longer (hopefully) life, and to be a better role model for my kids as far as health.

I am married to a very attractive women, not over weight which has been a personal frustration cause she does not understand being over weight.

Soooooo since my decision and date being set for being banded, I get comments how other women is going to make "a b***h go crazy" when the weight starts coming off

.

My faith has me deeply routed against adultery, no issues saying I would never act on a woman's advancement, I am just seriously worried the the jealously will be even worse and i have never given any reason for the jealousy prior. I have to admit i like her concern but i always temper it with "look at me, she wouldn't have anything to do with an over wieght old man...."

So I am looking for some serious insight to other banded men who are married and how the change to their physical appearance has affected their wives.......

I am not a man but I can say this, not long ago my husband and I went out to a concert. I was dressed tastefully and had all the confidence in the world. I looked good for my husband and I was excited, it was the first time I had felt that kind of confidence for as long as I could remember. He later told me that he had noticed a few men "checking me out", which I did not notice whatsoever. I asked him if that bothered him. He said to me that it did not bother him, that rather than getting jealous that other men were looking at me, he took it as a compliment and knew that no matter what he was the one going home with me so it really didnt matter. So I don't know your wife or anything but maybe if you found a way to word that to her she would see it as my husband saw it, as a compliment, I mean really a woman enjoys nothing more than KNOWING she has the prize and it has been and always will be hers to keep forever

I haven't noticed anyone checking me out. Sometimes I think it would be nice as it would be an additional boost to the ego. If anything I think us women tend to check other women out more than we do men. We like to compare how they look with how we look.

So who is making these comments about you. Maybe he/she actually has the hots for you anyway and is trying to project that onto others?

I guess it's going to depend on how you react and how secure you make her feel, certainly if you get a lot attention now and are confident in the way you look (sounds like you are!) then there's going to be no stopping you after you start to lose weight.

Jealousy is a funny thing, some people just seem to be more so than others so she'll have to come to terms with it.

I have had more compliments from gay guys and other women and they make me feel just as great as if a straight guy was hitting on me (actually, probably better, because I wouldn't know how to react!) Besides, I have so much fun flirting with my husband now and he flirts back, and we get to go home together. Work on your relationship and make sure your wife knows that she is the only one for you in everything that you do and say.

PS As I told my husband just yesterday, I couldn't get jealous of other women checking him out if I didn't love him so much.....