Took my 1st step!

Hello, My name is JJ. This week I have taken the first step in getting my health together. My insurance covers weight loss surgery after 6 months of supervised dieting. Today I saw my GP and she is completely supportive of this journey, and was genuinely honest about it being a tool, not a cure all. I appreciate the honesty. I have chosen a Dr. and will attend his seminar in a few days. At that point I will fill out the paperwork and go from there. About a year ago I had a major surgery that improved my health by 75%. Since then I realize how great I can feel, and the immense pleasure of being a part of life without pain. My BMI is 41. I am 5'1" and 219lbs @ 39 yrs of age. I have thyroid disease (hypo), high triglycerides, mild sleep apnea, depression (after losing a child) and am pre-diabetic. Around 10 years ago all self-esteem issues vanished for me after the birth of our child. I finally started living life as much as possible, only being held back by pain. I buy clothes that fit, and look nice, and never agonize about what I am wearing or how it fits. I take care to look up to date, and presentable for me. I like looking nice and feeling good. My husband is FABULOUS. When we met I was around 150 and as I grew through the years his devotion and commitment to me grew even deeper. He's not a chubby chaser, but loves me and respects me. He looks like a male model still, and I have grown obese. I know I have a good, good man. My goal is to feel as great as I can, be 100% a part of life, and come off of all my meds. I am ready for this change.

Thank you to everyone that is so forthcoming on this site. Just what I have read in the last few days has helped with questions and curiousness!