My husband and I just found out that a very good friend of ours has cancer. He is 24. The doctors found it in his genitals, and he had surgery. They recently did a ct scan and the cancer is in his lymph nodes of his stomach. He will be going through chemo. He will lose his hair. He will not be able to work, and he will never be able to have kids. And the doctors told him this will be very hard on him. I am speechless and scared. I have never had a friend who has cancer.

My problem is....I am an emotional eater. I am definitely getting better. Please give me ideas to not to give into the emotional eating. I need all the help I can get.

And for those that believe, please say a prayer for him, his family and the doctors. Thank you.

Prayers go out to him. How terrible. I would try seeing a therapist to gain control of your emotional eating. Emotional eating does not go away because you get the lapband. I have been seeing a therapist since 6 months before my surgery and it has helped a lot.

Millions of prayers to him--and you.

I know this is going to sound trite, but when I was facing my brother's and my mother's cancers, I made eating poorly a non-option. I knew that I would feel physically (and therefore emotionally) better if I ate properly, so I just MADE myself do it.

You can do it, too. It's hard, but try to find another outlet for your emotions---like expressing them (even in a journal, if it's hard for you to talk about them), instead of eating them.

Really,the eating won't make you feel better. Quite the contrary---with a band in your belly, it will make you feel worse.

Thank you! I have been doing good on not eating my emotions.

Betsy, you are so right. I need to make eating poorly not an option. I honestly never thought about it like that. My husband and I talk about it. We are both very upset by it.

And unfortunately, I have learned the hard way that eating my emotions makes me feel so much worse.

I totally, totally understand the impulse to eat---really, I do. But I promise, you'll feel better--and better withstand the stress--if you don't. Eventually, you'll lose the urge to do most emotional eating. It may hit from time to time, but it really can be pretty well extinguished.

I am no longer an emotional eater. I guess that's the one thing I can thank cancer (not mine; theirs) for. Now I'm just a too-much eater. Thank God for the band.