Dave_NW

Fran, welcome to the Forums. You've found the best place to get the answers you're after. The stories here run the gamut from rank beginner, to those who are well past reaching their goal weight. The stories are as varied as the people who wrote them. I invite you to read as much as you can. Don't stay within just a few forums - I've found many treads cross-relate to other forums, so it pays to browse around. There are folks who read the forums voraciously, and who are quick to reply to questions. And if that's not enough, go visit the chat rooms, where you can have a live conversation with people who may already have answers to your questions. And don't be afraid to ask questions, even if it seems like nobody else will know what you mean. This place is very supportive, and you're bound to make a lot of new friends here. I've been here a short time, and feel like I've known some of these people forever. I can assure you, your current state of mind is quite normal. Everyone has a million questions. As you learn more, you'll find answers to a lot of your current batch of questions, and you'll find new ones to ask. Relax and enjoy the ride. This is the first step to a whole new you. Best of luck, Dave

Ok. Makeup, lip gloss, and a front hook bra. Check! What else does a guy need? LOL! :001_tongue: Seriously, is there a list for a guy? Other than underwear, slippers, and maybe something else to wear besides the drafty hospital gown, I'm kind of drawing a blank here. I haven't been a hospital patient since I was 13... :confused1: Dave

I completely agree with you. It may sound weird, but my life is ALREADY better, and I haven't even had surgery. Why? Because I finally have a plan, and a way out. I know things won't be perfect, but they're bound to be a damn sight better than they are now. I can't wait. Dave

For me, it was a matter of bouncing back and forth from one to the other to the third choice, then finally moving from wanting the band to wanting the sleeve. (I have yet to have my surgery.) I decided on the sleeve after weighing how I perceived the band as temporary. I wasn't seriously committed. I think a lot of folks do the same - "if I have trouble I can have it removed." My weight gain has been progressive, and consistent for a long time. Nothing about that sounds temporary. Once I got used to the idea that my commitment needed to be a permanent choice, the decision to have the sleeve made the most sense. That, and knowing I wasn't having something artificial implanted into my body. (Have you SEEN the videos of what a band looks like inside of you after a few years? Holey crap!) I'm content the sleeve will let me live the most normal life - just as a much thinner me. Dave

Ericka, by now you're done. Hope things went well. Post your status soon! Good luck! Dave

Good luck, Tim! See you on the recovery side of the operating room. Dave

I think a lot of folks go from possible surgery to possible surgery until they find the one that suits them best. I know I did that. I was totally convinced the band was for me, until I spoke with some people who'd actually had it. The more I read about it, the more I realized it wasn't for me. So I switched to the RNY surgery. Until I spoke to some people who'd had it. None of them appeared healthy, and every one of them had had complications of some sort. It was pretty scary stuff. (And I have an Aunt who had it, and she's a mess.) Then I talked to a bariatric surgeon who is also a patient. He had the sleeve. When I asked him why he chose the sleeve, he said it was the right choice for him. I stepped back and considered my goals and needs with that perspective, and it became a no-brainer. With luck I'll have my surgery before the end of the year. And then all these "losers" here will have to slide over and make room for another "loser" to join them on the bench. :crying: Dave

Whew, thanks! I was worried. This guy does like his salsa... :001_tongue: Dave

Wow! That's impressive! I'm looking forward to hearing whether he makes it to TV! Good luck to you both! Dave

Tim, I think some people learn by observation. After you've had your surgery, and she sees what you're dealing with, she'll come around. She may truly be jealous at this point, but not because she doesn't want you to succeed - it sounds like she's just placing her personal frustration in front of the situation. After she sees you working your sleeve tool to manage your weight loss, and she sees how eating is different for you, and how it's not a magic bullet, she'll come around. I'm sure of it. What I'm doing at my house before my surgery is making sure everyone who'll be affected by my surgery knows I'm going to be handling things differently than I do know. food will be different, meals will be different, and I will be different. I've warned them in advance, and everyone is ready to be there for me. We'll see whether they follow through. But as already been said, use this forum as a resource. I find folks here are amazingly supportive. I've also spent some time in the chat room talking with those who have already been through it. I'm learning that those who have had the surgery are quick to want to help others succeed. So you'll find plenty of support, if you ask for it. And that includes me - I haven't had surgery yet, but I won't be far behind you, if all goes well. Just let me know if I can give you a guy's point of view on things. Good luck! Dave

So last night a group of us went to dinner at a local Mexican restaurant. As we were waiting for our meals, we were eating salsa and chips. The salsa was extremely spicy - we're talking NUCLEAR hot here. We asked the waitress to bring us something less spicy, which she did. I do enjoy spicy food, but there's a point where enough is enough. So I'm the only potential sleever in the group, and I got to thinking about whether there are any sleever issues with eating spicy food. Am I going to be able to enjoy what I like (in moderation, of course) or am I facing a life without spicy food? What will the future bring for me? Dave

Susan, is it going to be any kind of problem, you being a sleever and him being the next (potential) food network star? Kind of like the fox in charge of the henhouse? Dave

I wasn't here when you posted that challenge, but after reading your post, it seems to me like you need to shake up your life a little. It sounds like you're bored. So if "everything is back to normal" with the few exceptions you named, and you aren't happy with things, then it's time to make a change. Even a small one, but you need to start somewhere. What have you always wanted to do, just for you, but felt you couldn't because you were overweight? If you're an exercise person, maybe it's time to change up the routine. If you walk or hike, why not tackle a different route? Try lifting weights, or swim a longer distance, just to see if you can do it? I'll bet you can, but you won't know till you try. Is your house perfectly arranged to your liking? Maybe it's time to clean out those old closets, get rid of clothes you know you'll never wear again, and try to declutter things some. And if that's already been done, maybe it's time to paint the kitchen, to refresh things some, and to reflect your new relationship with food. You know you've wanted to do that for a long time - maybe now is the time. Nothing needs to be dramatic or expensive, but even a small change can make you feel empowered and rejuvenated. Just be sure it's a personal victory, so when it's done, you are the one who benefits from it. This weight loss journey is about you, so it's time to start giving yourself the rewards of your efforts. Hope this helps, and congratulations on your weight loss! Dave

It's easy to blame our problems on being overweight. A lot of folks feel that people (or even life itself) treats them differently because of the excess weight. It's actually pretty easy to do that. But I think after you're thin, when problems do come up, you'll be in a better place to deal with them. I say that because the overshadowing "If only I wasn't fat!" mental argument will be gone. You won't be forced to deal with the problem from beneath that perspective. Problems will certainly come up, but you'll be in a much better mental and emotional place. I think just knowing where you've been in your journey will automatically make you feel better, and give you a better skill set. And that means when the unicorns do show up, you'll be better equipped to chase them down. Dave

Congratulations on having your surgery! Hope recovery continues to go well, and that your success is everything you hope it to be. I'm hoping I can report similar good things after my surgery later this year. Dave

Wow, Tracey, what a journey you've had! From all I've read here, especially the band to sleeve revisions, you're absolutely heading down the right road, Wishing you all the best of luck with things. And can I say, reading of the issues you've had with the band is exactly why I changed my mind and decided to skip the band, and go right to sleeve as a first choice. I was gung ho to have the band at first, but the more I researched beyond the media hype, the more "real world" problems I was discovering. Once I made my sleeve choice, it was a no-brainer. Dave

Maybe my experience is different because I'm a guy, but the several people I've told have all been understanding. Some have even been enthusiastic. But all have been encouraging. I'm not making a big announcement at work, (sharing too much information where I work wouldn't be a good idea - people do love to talk...), but I have told a few close coworkers. Nobody has given me any trouble. But in perspective, most of these people know me pretty well. They've seen me battle my weight for a long tme. And they all know how unhappy I am. So I think it's going to be fine. The one thing I found interesting, was when I told them I was having weight loss surgery, nearly all of them said, "Oh, are you having bypass surgery?" Only a couple asked if I was "getting a lap band." With the popularity of the band, I would have thought that would be their first assumption. None knew what the sleeve was, but all agree it's a good choice for me. Good luck with your surgery! Dave

I keep hearing that sleevers shouldn't have caffeine. Why is that? Post surgery, I know I won't be able to drink a big cup of steaming fresh-brewed coffee, but why shouldn't I be able to have a bit of one? I'm a Northwest guy, and Starbucks is the LAW. :001_tt1: Dave

Congrats! Here's hoping things continue to go well for you. Since we're kind of neighbors, if you don't mind, where did you have your surgery done? Dave

It's my pleasure to offer whatever support to others that I can. They're helping me just as much. My surgery will be in Seattle later this year, (no date set as yet), with a surgeon (Dr. Ross McMahon) who is the head of the surgery center at Swedish Hospital. He's a pretty amazing doctor who is highly recommended. I know I'll be in good hands. I've read on this forum nothing but good things about Dr. Aceves and his clinic. I know you'll have a successful surgery with them. Meantime, keep reading, and don't be afraid to ask the nagging questions that bother you - folks here are tremendously supportive. Dave

Ladyrider, let me offer a male point of view: I've always been great at dieting. I can go on ANY diet, and lose great weight. But ya know what? When I go OFF the diet for any reason, the weight FLOODS back on. Not because I overeat, not because I'm lazy, and not because I'm weak. It comes back because my body has a balance it is trying to maintain, and it always wins. I lost 30 pounds on the South Beach Diet in two months. I was thrilled. Two months after that, I'd gained back SIXTY POUNDS. Despite everything I've ever tried, with each year that goes by, I weigh more and more. And I'm sick of it. I'm sick of being the marginalized fat guy in every roomful of people. I'm sick of worrying whether the airline seat will fit me, and whether the seatbelt will adjust far enough out to buckle. I'm sick of always being the designated driver, because I know I can't fit my excess body into the seat of the expensive European sports car my best friend owns. I'm sick of feeling, looking, and walking like an old man. I'm sick of being a pedestrian in my own life. And I'm sick of the fat jokes being made all around me, but most often by myself, as I try everything I can do to be accepted by my peers. Dr. Oz and whoever the heck else can parade success stories by the dozens across the TV stage as inspiration for those of us out here in the dark who will never be "that person." For every success story, there are thousands - no, TENS of thousands, of people just like me. Perfectly nice folks who just happen to have a lifelong battle with excess weight. If I've achieved enough in my life to have the extra money enough to pay for a way out of the Fat Guy Club, then I'm damn sure going to take that opportunity, and give it all I've got to finally, once and for all, win my personal battle of the bulge. You should let yourself vacillate awhile. Embrace it, and let your obviously intelligent mind come to its own conclusion. And if you ultimately decide that you DESERVE to have this surgery, then nobody has the right to make you feel like you're anything less than a wonderful person who has taken her personal bull by the horns, and is going to win this fight. This forum is filled with people just like you, and reading the success stories of those on the other side, amazing people like TIffykins, will provide you with a LOT of (pardon the pun) food for thought. I'm thrilled I found this place, and I'm looking forward to having my surgery within the next few months. I vacillated for quite awhile, but now I know it's the right choice for me. And nobody is going to take that away from me. I wish you nothing but success in this battle, and I'm looking forward to seeing "less" of you. :thumbup1: Best success wishes, Dave

Thanks, everyone. These posts are invaluable to me. I sincerely appreciate your candid remarks. There is no replacement for real-world experience. Keep them coming. My concern about having the sleeve done is whether I'll be required to make a big deal out of eating during my workday. The "put down the fork between bites" thing will take some serious planning. I work as an IT support tech for a busy hospital, and I'm on the go for a lot of my workday. lunch has always been done on the fly, when and if I can squeeze it in. Making time to just sit and focus on eating is going to take some work. It's a challenge I'm looking forward to facing. After all, crawling around under desks hooking up PCs when you weigh over 320 pounds is not something I like doing very much... :thumbup: Dave

Let me be the first (here) to congratulate you on all you've achieved. From my own experience, and what I'm reading here, getting to the place you're in takes a very strong commitment to the goal you've set for yourself. Here's hoping you get a speedy approval, followed by a successful and uneventful surgery! Best of luck, Dave

My understanding is that you need to wait till about a half hour after eating so you don't fill up on liquids, and undermine your eating. Dave

Have you noticed that each type of weight loss surgery, according to the fans of that surgery, seems to be the *only* possible choice anyone could make? It's kind of amusing. 1. Here at the VSG forums, everyone is all about VSG, and talks about all the problems with the band or with bypass surgeries. VSG is the *only* way to go. 2. Last evening I stepped into the Lap Band Chat Room just to check it out. Everyone there was nice, but went on and on about all the problems of VSG or RNY. They raved about how the band was the *only* surgery anyone should have. 3. A month or so ago I attended a live support group for RNY bypass folks. Everyone there was great to talk to, but every single one of them also had nothing positive to say about the other choices. Everybody said the RNY was the *only* surgery to have. I'm sure each surgery has its place for all the right reasons, but the devout loyalty of each group is pretty amusing. :laugh0: Dave