AtALoss

I have struggled with weight my whole life.  The only time I remember being a normal weight was when I was born.  After that, I was always heavy for my age, height, etc.  I would always promise myself that I would never get to 200 pounds, then it became 250, then 300, and so on and so forth.  After topping out at 364 and after much soul searching and a lot of tears, I decided to have the surgery.  RNY was a little too drastic for me, so I opted for the LapBand.  Like everyone, I had tried every diet known to man and sometimes was successful, but most of the time, was not.  And I certainly don't blame the diets.  There was never any question in my mind that it was me.  For whatever the reasons were, I just wouldn't succeed at it, and I'll spare everyone all the psycho babble, but I strongly feel that I have an addiction to food, as I'm sure you all can relate.  The only option for me at that point was to have surgery, and even though I still struggle to keep the weight off, yes, even after the surgery, I am still satisfied with my decision.  The band is doing exactly what it's supposed to do.  It's me that still fights it every now and then.  I am grateful, however, that it helps to keep me in check and reminds me that it's still there and that I don't need to eat as much as my mind wants to.  I lost 137 pounds in about a year and a half, and even though I would love to lose more, I am happy that I've lost what I did.  Now that the honeymoon period is over, however, I decided that I need to keep in touch with people who have the same issues as I do and that can help me with my struggles.  That's why I'm here.  I do not want to gain it all back.  I have gained back about 37 pounds, which still makes my loss 100 pounds, but it sure would be nice to start going down again.  I am scared but am very hopeful that I can do this.  If anybody out there can relate and has some advice, please let me know!!!