rachnett

So i was banded 8/21/09. Up until 5/3/10 (so not quite 9 months) i had lost 57 lbs. I've gone from a size 20 jean to a 14. From a 2x or 3x t-shirt to an off the rack xl (you have no idea how thrilled i am with that!). I have no idea how many fills i've had, i know i had one slight de-fill in DEC. but i pretty much was just going in every three to four weeks. i had my last fill 2/17/10 and between 2/17 and 5/3 i lost about 6lbs. Admittedly i was kind of tired of all of it and just wanted a break. I didn't want to be poked with a gigantic needle. i didn't want to sit in the doctor's office forever (he's always running behind but on the flip side he always gives you the time you need). I was tired of analyzing everything that went into my mouth and feeling guilty about not exercising. i was tired of never having anything that fit without having to spend money (I've been buying new clothes all along because i can't stand ill fitting clothes. chock that up to ocd, lol). Thankfully during this time i did still drop a few lbs. i never gained. Which i credit to the lifestyle changes that the band has forced me to make. And i was pleased to know that i could at least maintain at this point. So i finally decided i needed to kick it back into gear and i scheduled a fill for 5/4. Since Tuesday I've steadily dropped from 220 to 214 (6 lbs in 5 days!). my diet has been very soft and mushy. Lots of fat free re-fried Beans and cheese to get my Protein in (i totally enjoyed about a half a cup of hamburger/spaghetti sauce and mozzarella all baked together at my mom's (everyone else at lasagna, i reduced it to that)). But i have to say i am NOT hungry. I actually have to make sure i eat a little something before i leave the house because i know i will need something and i absolutely can not eat anywhere other than home right now. I know my limits (they make themselves very apparent) as I'm very tight in the morning. I've not actually vomited but i get the slimmy-ies when i take too big of a bite/don't chew well enough/eat something i shouldn't. You know the point where i can not swallow my own saliva for a few minutes. (although as i was in the bathroom at work Friday, leaning over the toilet, getting rid of the excess saliva, I was noticing how nice and thin my legs look, which made me giggle!) Gotta love negative reinforcement though!!! anyway my question is, is this it? I'm i finally at my "sweet spot"? i keep thinking it's going to loosen up like it normally does but it doesn't seem to be. and i must say I'm feeling great and feeling really accomplished! So far today everything is the same. I don't know if this has just renewed my good attitude but i'm also finding it easier to get out of the house and get some exercise! maybe all my moons have just finally aligned!

i can not remember the last time i bought a loaf of bread. i wasn't a big bun eater before surgery so i don't miss bread in that form at all. and it's true you lose your taste for bread/pasta. i do not do pasta. the other day i thought oh maybe i'll try a little. it's not that it went badly it just tastes so HEAVY. there is no enjoyment in it. that's the only way i can explain it. and i can do potatoes i just don't very often. i'm all about the meat!!!!

if my weight loss stopped right now it would still be worth it. after every fill i feel like i have to re learn what and how i can eat. and yeah i've gotten stuck and yeah that is horrible. but it's enough to remind me next time what not to do (negative reinforcement). i never gave gastric bypass a thought. i knew what i needed was a tool to help me learn to eat correctly. i don't ever deprive myself and i don't have to. if i need a little bowl of ice cream i have that. but never in excess and i always keep it in my daily calorie count. that helps to keep me sane and i am continuing to lose, slowly but surely. the band is the best thing that i've done for myself!

every morning. after going to the bathroom and before getting in the shower. i'm big on consistency!!

I've been thinking about doing something about the vertical grooves between my eyebrows. When i squint they are more pronounced but now it seems like they never relax and are pretty noticeable. i have yet to make an appointment. What was the cost? and did you go to your dermatologist or a plastic surgeon?

i'm going out tonight to find a ring snuggie! You guys are the greatest. I've been so disappointed that i've not been able to wear my bands and i won't re size them for at least another 6 months. i've gone from a ring size 10 to an 8 1/2 at the moment. and i'm about 3 weeks away from my 6 month mark. 50 lbs lost officially as of this morning!

my doctor did my first fill 3 weeks after surgery and then he said to come back in a month. but i felt like i was really struggling so i called after a couple weeks and he had me come in for my 2nd fill. after that i went every two to three weeks for my next couple fills. i really like that his approach is so tailored my individual needs. he also does all his fills in his office. the other doctor in that same office, i've heard, does all of his fills in xray under fluoroscope and he does them 4 weeks apart. i would not want to drink barium every time i needed a fill, YUCK!

oh you are cracking me up!!! that is so something i will do when i get out of these 14's and into 12's. I can't wait!

1) i would say i'm probably more sensitive at times hence more irritable. You know how an infant can become over stimulated from being passed around, etc. I feel that way sometimes, like i just need absolute quiet and less activity around me. keep in mind i'm an only child. 2) normal my sleep is good. This last month i had some issues with waking up very very early and not being able to go back to sleep. but that is the first time i can remember that happening. 3) my sex drive is pretty low but has been for a long long time. so really there has been no change there in the past 6 years or so. 4) i would say i'm fairly financially responsible. We have no credit cards so that helps. I do know i can't manage credit which is why i don't have it. We pay our bills, and we live with in our means. There are times when shopping is indeed a high though. I love to shop! i think i love to shop more than i like to eat, lol!! I have to tell you i had an appointment with a new therapist last night. i was crying about 10 minutes into the appointment and she talked more than i did. But wow, I love her. We primarly dealt with my parental issues but she said things that clicked in my head. I felt so much better when i left. I really think she is going to be able to make a difference. I'm already looking forward to my next appointment. and she said what you've said too, what difference does the bipolar II lable make? i'm very optimistic that i can make things better. oh she was just marvelous! thanks to you guys too!! it really helps to be able to talk about all of this!!

Thanks, it all does help! i knew i could get some feed back here :rolleyes2: My primary care doc wasn't buying the bipolar II diagnosis. She herself deals with depression so she is very familiar with what i'm going through. She's seen me on up days and down days, that's for sure. I'm really hoping that my appointment with the new therapist is helpful. I'm optimistic! I must say the wellbutrin seems to be helping, though it's hard to tell if it's that or just the fact that it's not pms week (that's when it's the worst). i guess time will tell if this combination of meds is going to do the trick.

thanks. i do have an appointment with a new therapist this coming week. My primary care doc sees her and recommended her. We'll see how it goes i guess. my argument was always that i'm high functioning but i guess that is common in bipolar type II. i typically try to blame stress for my "symptoms". I work 40-50 hours a week where i have to make decisions constantly, I run my own photography business where i can work anywhere from 5-20 hours a week, i have two great kids (11 & 9) who are involved in school things and music lessons, a husband (who probably takes more work than the kids, lol), a house to run, bills to pay, i'm an elder at my church. oh and i have friends and like to have a bit of a social life. how is it possible that i can be bipolar yet manage all of that? I would say that 90% of the time all the craziness is contained within my head. but then maybe i'm kidding myself about that. maybe my moods are more obvious than i realize. I know i'm a control freak and maybe that's why i don't like the label. it feels like being bipolar means that i don't have control over things. my pms seems to have become pmdd. and this last month was the first time that i felt like my thoughts were actually coming out of no where. It was almost like i was asking myself "where did that idea come from?" though i still felt like i had control over what action i took in relation to the thoughts, what happens when i don't have control?

does anyone have experience with bipolar type II? One of the psychiatrist that i saw for my psych eval talked to me for about 20 minutes, had me fill out a couple one pages questionnaires and then told me that he thought i suffered from bipolar type II and put me on Lamictal. Originally i fought that diagnosis. On my fourth appointment i flat out told him i thought he had jumped the gun on this diagnosis and that all i really wanted from him was my approval so i could get on with the processes of getting approval from my insurance company. Which he gave me. i've had on going issues with depression and anxiety and have taken some sort of anti depressant for the past 12 years or so. so it's not like i'm in denial about those issues. but for whatever reason i have an issue with being labeled as bipolar. my primary care doc recently added in wellbutrin (i currently take cymbalta) as i've been having increasingly ugly pms weeks. I guess i'm not sure what i'm looking for, lol. maybe just some insight from people who've had this diagnosed. I do want to get the nasty PMS under control but i would like to do it without having to take mood stabilizers. I'm hoping the wellbutrin will help with that, but what if it doesn't? What if bipolar II is really the issue? and how would i know? how do you know if what you are experience is the result of bipolar type II or just a crazy, busy, stressful life (combined with a creative perfectionist that like to be in control, lol!!!)?