janke129

Brendaanise-thank you for your thoughts. I was on the fence quite awhile and then I knew it was the right thing to do. I had totally lost me and when I left I had trouble thinking what do I want to do, my interests..instead of always him,him,him. Edazul- I know how you feel as I turned to another man when my marriage was definently over. I had forgotten how nice it was to be treated well and listened to and it got out of hand. My husband suspected but it was never confirmed. I am not a therapist but I know the trust issue will take time. Has your husband forgiven you? It is not only what he thinks, you have to forgive yourself and build a new future together and let go of the past. If you regret your mistake and always keep thinking and rebuilding with your husband, the trust will build and you will be able to work through this. I agree that kids do better with 2 loving parents apart than living on a battleground and staying together just because of them. Jabba the Mutt- I agree with most of what you said Except a couple of points. First, the part about finding a man less attractive than me and having him grateful. Isn't that the descrimation that we fight against that people look differently at us because we are fat. What about how a person is on the inside, interests, morals, and being compadable? And second, I don't feel I want to be envied by other women. I have never thought of who I was because of what other women thought. I have worked on how I could be a better person but always on my standards, who I wanted to be or become. I have never lived by how I was doing by keeping score or keeping up with the Jones'. Bottom line, I wholeheartely agree with "do not stay where you are not valued, and failure is not a sin so long as we learn from it. " Life is short, don't let it slip you by..........

I was married for 20 years to a man that was good as gold one minute and then in a instant could turn cold and distant. I also felt I could fix him, or change him with love and support. He was the father of my 2 kids but it got to the point that I was walking on eggshells, afraid to talk because I never knew how he would react. He would yell, rant and rave and then he would apoligize and say he loved me, couldn't live without me and it would never happen again. It got to the point that I was having trouble breathing when he was in the room, it felt like the air would all of a sudden be sucked out. One day my oldest daughter told me that when she turned 18 she wanted to adopt her younger sister to get away from him...I did not need to think about it anymore we left that night. I was confused and scared and even felt guilty for leaving him ... sometimes I think I have wasted 20 years, but then I look at my 2 daughters and I would not have had them without him. Three years later, I am married to a wonderful man who loves my kids as his own. I trust him totally and really appriciate all the little things because I remember how it used to be. I am so happy that I finally took control and changed my life!

I would like to sit on a plane or theater without being squished. I would like to hike, swim, bowl , try new things. I want to wear a tight leather catwoman outfit for Halloween.

My name is Janice and I had surgery 11-5-08. I had no trouble with diet at first because I was afraid of messing up and did not want to experience the dreaded pbing. Now, a couple of months out, I can eat more and luckily have never had more than food caught a couple of times. I have had 1 fill and still have no restrictions. I cannot wait for my next fill and hopefully I will start losing more quickly. I have not lost as much weight as I had hoped, but I feel so much better with the heathier diet. I do not like to exersise and have had trouble starting a routine.