Band_Groupie

I plan to avoid going out to eat until I know I can eat a small portion with no problems...as someone said here; you're not lying if you say you're dieting and just eating less.

If any of us pre-bands had to eat in the center of an arena with the stadium filled we certainly wouldn't look like we do. (There's a new weight loss plan). We're all closet eaters

CLIFF NOTES: I started off to write a somewhat funny note about one of my teens who had a rant:incazzato: last night, and somehow ended up on the shrinks couch:couch2:below. I’ve been feeling kind of melancholy since my good news and happy day Thurs. and I couldn’t figure out why. :cool: Apparently, I’m feeling guilty for putting myself first by going through this process. Hey at least it saved me an hour at the pre-op psych visit…tee hee:biggrin:. Don’t bother reading unless you’re there too… (Back to myself now, thank you.:tongue2:) -BG (I'm saving the rest just to remind myself of this.) -------------------------------------- It seems just yesterday I had a job I loved at a Fortune 500, and was on the fast track up the ladder with a very bright future ahead. But I was traveling all the time and my (2 then) kids were in daycare for LONG days. I could only involve them in things that were only on the weekends (try telling your 5 yr. old daughter she can’t take gymnastics classes on Tuesday’s after school with her friend). DH was gone many night’s working hard on his Master’s part-time for 8 years at night, and his job also required a little travel, so we were mainly a “Weekend Family”. It only got harder and harder as the kids got older (I thought they needed your time most as little kids-BIG “wrong”). I couldn’t find that elusive “Super Mom” balance between work and family and we needed a change (I so admire those of you who can do it all- some of my sisters included). I was pregnant with my third when DH was offered a promotion to a sales position back to my home town where a lot of my family still was. I didn’t hesitate one second…It was a happy change for us all. We moved and we were now able to afford it, so I stopped working. If I’m being honest it was a hard transition going from the “fast track” to “homemaker”. With a new baby, and DH now traveling I’d go days without seeing an adult. Also, it’s kind of like being fat…people stereotype you...and with the move, no one knew I had had a career…I found people suddenly treating me like I didn’t have a brain…the topics of conversation in my life suddenly changed. Even I was guilty of this at first …I’d been friends with neighbors for years before I’d asked anything other than about life as a Mom. There were lawyers, nurses, teachers, all kinds of “formers”. And yes, those who’d never had a job also had lives outside their families…wow I was guilty of not thinking homemakers have a brain too…there were volunteers for great organizations, those that had hobbies like mine, brilliant women! Anyway, I had to keep busy so I volunteered for everything; was the Girl Scout Leader, the “Homeroom Mom” for all three of them every year (for as long as they’d let me-about middle school), and I was a former art teacher, so the schools used my talents for all kinds of things and I was there with my youngest in tow most days. I helped start a “play group” in my neighborhood for Moms/little ones. I immediately signed my two older ones for so many things they’d been asking to do. We all appreciated our new life. That first summer, I counted 14 “legs” in the car one day with the baby zigzagging the older ones around town…not good either… We found a balance and the kid’s all were able to dabble in many thing and they each found their gifts/niche. We’ve since moved again (I designed our current home with the help of an architect software program, not a huge house, but it meets our family needs perfectly!) and the kids are now older; two teens and one is 21 (I can’t believe I’ll be down to one at home next year). I’ve certainly never been bored at home as I’ve always been busy. My youngest, 13, still needs the most time from Mom but my “job” at home has evolved more and more into time devoted to major home reno. projects; tiling, painting, sewing curtains, finished the basement/bath (I’ll never mud drywall again), built a pond with waterfall, designed and built a finished clubhouse for the kids, etc. (with help from DH & the kids). I love tackling learning something I’ve never done so I’m pretty handy, and I feel good that I’ve saved us tons of money doing all this myself (even my neighbor friends who are at home sometimes tell me I make them look bad). As a homemaker, I’ve had to come to grips with the fact that you can only get those pats on the back from your family mainly, and they get used to your capabilities, so the pats don’t always come as often. Gone are the work days when a job well done meant you had whole teams of people singing your praises…and forget getting a promotion! I haven’t regretted anything…but with my youngest turning 13 I’m suddenly finding I no longer have that little kid in the house who thinks you know everything and glows at every little thing you do…and you’re the hardest working mom on Earth. Getting through these teen years is just difficult some days, and I knew it would be. Some days they act like/tell me I have no clue. My sister gave me a magnet that says “Ask your Teenager now while they still know everything!”, and yep, I still have a brain. It’s funny, my kids hardly remember me working and they’re wonderful kids, hard workers, not spoiled, but as teens often do, they don’t always appreciate the sacrifices you’ve made in your life for them. They don't like it when I have to said “no” (I’m the disciplinarian and DH is the softie…he’s still working on it), but I know they love me and they do show it/say so. They unknowingly say hurtful things like “I wonder why you don’t have a job?” like their friend’s mom. There’s some days I want to scream “What do you mean I don’t have a job…who’s raising you? Don’t you know I gave up working for our happiness? Do they realize how different things would be for them even now if I was working?…Don’t they remember…” Of course they don’t. I’m happy with my life…I’ve got a wonderful family and a great life, and again, I don’t regret anything…but some days-TEENS! I get glimmers of hope that they’ll get this someday…my daughter’s about ready to graduate college and she’s coming out of that teen funk; she’s starting to ask me about things that let me know she gets it. Reading this over I’m sounding so negative, and that’s not me at all…I’m a giving person who gives out of love, not looking for appreciation; the typical nurturer – family first. *Lightbulb* I just realized this week when I saw this Lap Band thing was probably going to be a reality I was feeling guilty that I was putting myself before my family. I felt guilty I was taking time to do this just for me. That’s probably at least part of the reason I’ve let myself get to this state of health, never putting me first. Writing this was helpful for me to realize the whole family will benefit from seeing me work hard, and yes, just for me! (even if only my DH knows about the LB)…I realize the one thing I’ve yet to be able to balance in my life was sometimes putting myself first.

CLIFF NOTES: I started off to write a somewhat funny note about one of my teens who had a rant:incazzato: last night, and somehow ended up on the shrinks couch:couch2:below. I’ve been feeling kind of melancholy since my good news and happy day Thurs. and I couldn’t figure out why. Apparently, I’m feeling guilty for putting myself first by going through this process. Hey at least it saved me an hour at the pre-op psych visit…tee hee:biggrin:. Don’t bother reading unless you’re there too… (Back to myself now, thank you.:wub:) -BG (I'm saving the rest just to remind myself of this.) -------------------------------------- It seems just yesterday I had a job I loved at a Fortune 500, and was on the fast track up the ladder with a very bright future ahead. But I was traveling all the time and my (2 then) kids were in daycare for LONG days. I could only involve them in things that were only on the weekends (try telling your 5 yr. old daughter she can’t take gymnastics classes on Tuesday’s after school with her friend). DH was gone many night’s working hard on his Master’s part-time for 8 years at night, and his job also required a little travel, so we were mainly a “Weekend Family”. It only got harder and harder as the kids got older (I thought they needed your time most as little kids-BIG “wrong”). I couldn’t find that elusive “Super Mom” balance between work and family and we needed a change (I so admire those of you who can do it all- some of my sisters included). I was pregnant with my third when DH was offered a promotion to a sales position back to my home town where a lot of my family still was. I didn’t hesitate one second…It was a happy change for us all. We moved and we were now able to afford it, so I stopped working. If I’m being honest it was a hard transition going from the “fast track” to “homemaker”. With a new baby, and DH now traveling I’d go days without seeing an adult. Also, it’s kind of like being fat…people stereotype you...and with the move, no one knew I had had a career…I found people suddenly treating me like I didn’t have a brain…the topics of conversation in my life suddenly changed. Even I was guilty of this at first …I’d been friends with neighbors for years before I’d asked anything other than about life as a Mom. There were lawyers, nurses, teachers, all kinds of “formers”. And yes, those who’d never had a job also had lives outside their families…wow I was guilty of not thinking homemakers have a brain too…there were volunteers for great organizations, those that had hobbies like mine, brilliant women! Anyway, I had to keep busy so I volunteered for everything; was the Girl Scout Leader, the “Homeroom Mom” for all three of them every year (for as long as they’d let me-about middle school), and I was a former art teacher, so the schools used my talents for all kinds of things and I was there with my youngest in tow most days. I helped start a “play group” in my neighborhood for Moms/little ones. I immediately signed my two older ones for so many things they’d been asking to do. We all appreciated our new life. That first summer, I counted 14 “legs” in the car one day with the baby zigzagging the older ones around town…not good either… We found a balance and the kid’s all were able to dabble in many thing and they each found their gifts/niche. We’ve since moved again (I designed our current home with the help of an architect software program, not a huge house, but it meets our family needs perfectly!) and the kids are now older; two teens and one is 21 (I can’t believe I’ll be down to one at home next year). I’ve certainly never been bored at home as I’ve always been busy. My youngest, 13, still needs the most time from Mom but my “job” at home has evolved more and more into time devoted to major home reno. projects; tiling, painting, sewing curtains, finished the basement/bath (I’ll never mud drywall again), built a pond with waterfall, designed and built a finished clubhouse for the kids, etc. (with help from DH & the kids). I love tackling learning something I’ve never done so I’m pretty handy, and I feel good that I’ve saved us tons of money doing all this myself (even my neighbor friends who are at home sometimes tell me I make them look bad). As a homemaker, I’ve had to come to grips with the fact that you can only get those pats on the back from your family mainly, and they get used to your capabilities, so the pats don’t always come as often. Gone are the work days when a job well done meant you had whole teams of people singing your praises…and forget getting a promotion! I haven’t regretted anything…but with my youngest turning 13 I’m suddenly finding I no longer have that little kid in the house who thinks you know everything and glows at every little thing you do…and you’re the hardest working mom on Earth. Getting through these teen years is just difficult some days, and I knew it would be. Some days they act like/tell me I have no clue. My sister gave me a magnet that says “Ask your Teenager now while they still know everything!”, and yep, I still have a brain. It’s funny, my kids hardly remember me working and they’re wonderful kids, hard workers, not spoiled, but as teens often do, they don’t always appreciate the sacrifices you’ve made in your life for them. They don't like it when I have to said “no” (I’m the disciplinarian and DH is the softie…he’s still working on it), but I know they love me and they do show it/say so. They unknowingly say hurtful things like “I wonder why you don’t have a job?” like their friend’s mom. There’s some days I want to scream “What do you mean I don’t have a job…who’s raising you? Don’t you know I gave up working for our happiness? Do they realize how different things would be for them even now if I was working?…Don’t they remember…” Of course they don’t. I’m happy with my life…I’ve got a wonderful family and a great life, and again, I don’t regret anything…but some days-TEENS! I get glimmers of hope that they’ll get this someday…my daughter’s about ready to graduate college and she’s coming out of that teen funk; she’s starting to ask me about things that let me know she gets it. Reading this over I’m sounding so negative, and that’s not me at all…I’m a giving person who gives out of love, not looking for appreciation; the typical nurturer – family first. *Lightbulb* I just realized this week when I saw this Lap Band thing was probably going to be a reality I was feeling guilty that I was putting myself before my family. I felt guilty I was taking time to do this just for me. That’s probably at least part of the reason I’ve let myself get to this state of health, never putting me first. Writing this was helpful for me to realize the whole family will benefit from seeing me work hard, and yes, just for me! (even if only my DH knows about the LB)…I realize the one thing I’ve yet to be able to balance in my life was sometimes putting myself first.

Pistol- Just wanted to mention that I have BCBS, but in PA (every state/even area is different for BCBS). But something to ask since you mentioned pre op testing/psych etc. I was clearly told that my BCBS will not accept any pre op testing requirements done more than 6 mo. out FROM THE SURGERY DATE (if it's longer you have to pay to get them redone). Surgery will generally not come immediately at the end of your 6 mo. diet so add a month or two at least for approval process/possible complications. They told us to wait at least until you've done 2 mo. of the diet to start these. Just a heads up and good luck with your start!

I want to sell some of our packrat "stuff" in the basement on eBay (some small antiques, books, and lots of my kids stuff now that my youngest is 13 and they've moved out of the toy stage). I've been planning this for a year, but I'm afraid to get started because I don't know what I'm doing. I've been setting aside stuff in boxes and the mound is growing. We've got a verified PayPal account we've been using for years to buy...yep, more "stuff". I've watched some of those video training things on eBay awhile back, but I know they changed some of their costs, etc. the past year. I've been collecting small boxes, bubble wrap and peanuts for a year. I'm afraid I'll make major beginner mistakes that will end up costing us money. Do I start a new eBay account just to sell? Is it safe to have this tied to our bank account when you're selling (even though we're verified we always us a credit card to pay now). I'm most confused about the shipping part as I know I've combined items often when purchasing on eBay so how do you know what to charge for shipping and also if they combine items. Do I bundle inexpensive things like board games together or is it better to sell everything as single items? I'm not sure about some of it even being worth anything (no broken stuff, but stuff that I wouldn't think is worth the shipping cost...so is there money to be made?)? :confused:Do you pay for all those extras always- extra pics, etc. I've got a digital camera, but keep in mind I've never put a pic on the internet so I'm not a techie but I'm eager to learn...haven't even figured out how to do an avatar yet. I've heard Sun. night is a good time to end...are their good months to start selling?...is now a bad time of year? How did you start and what mistakes have you made?:cool: Please share your tips! Now that I'm working toward getting banded next summer I'm motivated to start this so I can cover whatever the insurance won't...including years of fills. Thanks so much for ANY advice:smile:!

Oh, I just had to write you a note...If I could only go back in time and do this years ago! You're so smart to reach for help in your 20's. I spent decades yo-yoing major amounts of weight...what a waste of time. Your words "I think that is what makes the lap band appeal to me. It won't work unless I work as well." could have come out of my mouth. Dec. 1...you go girl!

Thanks for all the great info.! I'm with Highmark too (they cover 90 days post op so at least the first fill). Did you do the psych visit at AGH also? Hope you're doing well. We've been in Pgh for 8 years now; just off the 228 exit/7 Flds.

I got my two boys out this afternoon mowing & sucking up all the fall leaves with me since we’re having a heat wave-60 degrees high (rain or snow tomorrow; 30’s high next week). Florida Pete I don’t want to hear a word! We have a hill with huge trees behind us so you could hardly see the grass for all the leaves. There’s something about the smell of slightly wet leaves that always reminds me of college…I guess it’s that back to school smell. When I was younger it was “paste”:tongue2:...I’m aging myself again aren’t I?…Hey, do they even MAKE school paste anymore?:eek: We’re been doing the final college visits now with my middle one (boy); the one I mentioned just got into National Honor Society this week (sorry, proud). My DH (Mr. SA) is taking him on his last two different visits this weekend (wish I was going, but my youngest has a commitment). It’s good kids know what they want; he wants a huge school, my daughter is a senior at mid-size one. She would tell me to insert a shameless resume here…but I’ll keep it to anyone looking for a bright employee: double major-marketing/intl. business, let me know :cool:(She’ll have me on the street corner wearing a sandwich board for her soon). What a bad time to graduate and be seeking employment huh?...but I envy them those wonderful college years! So fall reminds me of walking around my college campus and all the expectations of a new school year. I was thinking today that starting this LB process now in the fall brings a lot of the same feelings I had then; anticipation, hopefulness, eagerness, anxiousness, etc. So I’ll use this school year to get educated (about LB) and for now I’m just hoping I’ll be “graduating” to a new part of my life…just about the same time as my two oldest ones! :drool::tt1:

I got my two boys out this afternoon mowing & sucking up all the fall leaves with me since we’re having a heat wave-60 degrees high (rain or snow tomorrow; 30’s high next week). Florida Pete I don’t want to hear a word!:w00t: We have a hill with huge trees behind us so you could hardly see the grass for all the leaves. There’s something about the smell of slightly wet leaves that always reminds me of college…I guess it’s that back to school smell. When I was younger it was “paste”:wub:...I’m aging myself again aren’t I?…Hey, do they even MAKE school paste anymore?:huh2: We’re been doing the final college visits now with my middle one (boy); the one I mentioned just got into National Honor Society this week (sorry, proud). My DH (Mr. SA) is taking him on his last two different visits this weekend (wish I was going, but my youngest has a commitment). It’s good kids know what they want; he wants a huge school, my daughter is a senior at mid-size one. She would tell me to insert a shameless resume here…but I’ll keep it to anyone looking for a bright employee: double major-marketing/intl. business, let me know (She’ll have me on the street corner wearing a sandwich board for her soon). What a bad time to graduate and be seeking employment huh?...but I envy them those wonderful college years! So fall reminds me of walking around my college campus and all the expectations of a new school year. I was thinking today that starting this LB process now in the fall brings a lot of the same feelings I had then; anticipation, hopefulness, eagerness, anxiousness, etc. So I’ll use this school year to get educated (about LB) and for now I’m just hoping I’ll be “graduating” to a new part of my life…just about the same time as my two oldest ones! :cool::w00t::cool:

Ohhh Kathy! I'm so glad to find you...you'll be 6 mo. ahead and I can watch how it goes (no pressure here). Yep I mentioned his "4 ducklings" (interns) in my blog yesterday...he had the girl give a few tiny pieces of the presentation. A few days earlier and I could have been there at the same time...bringing balloon bouquet!:Dancing_wub: Hope you don't mind obsessive questions about AGH (when you're feeling up to it)...tell me to get lost when you've had enough! - Since they offer both types of bands, which one did you chose and why? - Did you select the spot for your port (since it's our choice), if so, where & why? - How many fills/unfills are included with your surgery for free? - Did you use AGH for any of the pre-op testing and if so, who exactly and would you recommend them? And confirm for me that ins. covers all the preop testing? - How have you found the staff so far?...after emailing Patty with no response I was moody when I saw she was presenting, but she was great...knew the answer to every tiny question about anyone's insurance; we had folks from OH & WV too. I'm so happy your on the other side now! Take it easy :Dancing_sorry: and let us know how you're doing. -BG

OhBill!:Dancing_wub: I thought a man would like another remote? BTW- Just started a poll on General LB Forum...Where would you move your port? I'm hoping others can decide where to mark my "X"!!

Sounds like a great option and like you already know a lot about them! I know I was surprised at who I ended up selecting. I don't mind small, as long as the stats (% complications, slippage, etc.) are similar to the big guys and they can handle anything that comes up, bigger isn't always better for everything. I've decided that with all the aftercare in this process; ability to get in quickly, see the same people who'll get to know you and maybe even see your surgeon is a plus for the little guys. I've been to the big guys (used Magee for female issues) for other things and have experienced not being able to get in for 3 mo., waiting forever in a huge waiting room and seeing a different nurse pract. ea time...it's may be good healthcare, but it's not excellent care as a whole, and it's certainly not personal. Good luck on the continuing quest!

Because we keep hearing here how it has been a new beginning for so many! You poor thing...Hang in there...did they tell you how many days it would take? We're here for you!

Thanks for the link...really good info. Wish they offered it here! Yeah...he said it would have something external (like a remote) that would control the fill. :Dancing_sorry:

I just found out I have a choice and can put the port just about anywhere on my body (I think that still means only on the front, not back of my body). I’m hearing that many of you have had issues with where it is as you’ve gotten thinner (now: shows, hurts ribs, bothers you with clothing/beltline, moved, flipped because of loc., etc.). So…<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p> <o:p></o:p> For those who are near goal/goal (or if you’re down enough now to know how you’d answer this). If you were starting over, and could mark and “X” right where you want your port…where would you put it (so where would you move yours to)? If it's over to one side I don't care about right/left as everyone has a different answer to this based on dominate side, which side you sleep on, etc.

Thanks- great info...I wondered why people had so many fill visits!

Oh...I almost forgot!! Cool news!:tongue2: At the AGH seminar the Doc told us that laproscopic surgery is coming for the Lap where they will enter ONLY through the belly button (no 5 scars)...and even better...someone made a flip comment about having a remote for your port and he said a portless LB is also in the works...maybe it WOULD come with a remote control:shades_smile:!

Ohhh my stocking feet are cold just listening to you...I want to be in warm flip flops...you know...when they've been sitting out in the sun and you slip them on..mmm. We're actually having a heat wave today (after 2 bouts of flurries this month)...it's 61 now...so if It's only 8 degrees higher why are you in shorts and I'm freezing?!! I know the answer...because it's FL!...I got off the plane there in Jan. and I'm into shorts no matter what the temp. Snow coming Sunday early and highs in the 30's the rest of the week...burrr!

So it seems like everyone's is up pretty high? I thought some would also have it low-below the belt line? Shoulder?!!! I can't imagine that not buggin' me there. Wow-maybe he wasn't kidding when he said "neck". "trudy" LOL...how can "she" move from your belly button up to just under your bra (I realize that measurement gets smaller as you do, but still that's min. 6", right?!)?:tongue2:

Shira- What is Magees policy on fills (they didn't tell us)? At AGH you get a certain # of fills (I can't believe I didn't ask how many- but I will) included with your surgery. I think I remember you saying that Excela had a "lifetime" plan...wow? AGH also said that our insurance, Highmark, covers only 90 days of post-op care no matter where you go (that's probably only the first fill if you're waiting about 6 weeks, right? So you're right that what the hospital includes above that is an issue.). Does Magee cover a certain no. or a certain amount of time? I'm getting my new questions together for AGH insurance girl, thanks. Just googled Excela...they hadn't come up on my radar when I researched this (probably because they aren't near me). It sounds like your PCP is there, so maybe this would be easier for you (If your healthy I think this surgery is pretty safe to have done anywhere- JMO)? Or if Magee doesn't work out, if you're East of town, would St. Margaret's work for you? Now that you know what you want & what your questions are...you could give them a call? They didn't offer any info. on their fill policy either so I can't help you there.

I was reading through all the seminar info. I received yesterday so I could compile info. for a post on the seminars I attended. One of them, Magee, gave out a paper that makes a sweeping statement for everyone (no matter the insurance). "Your weight must be identical, or less at month six, when compared to month one. Many insurers discourage even modest variations in weight throughout the six months. Do your best to keep your weight constant each month (or even a modest loss of 1-2 pounds a month). We have found that even weight increases of a pound or two have been grounds for insurance denial." I've read here not to go below the minimum BMI (35 or 40 depending on the cat.), but are they saying try not to lose much? I weighed in "heavy" at my initial visit (long story- you'll have to read my blog here from Mon. this week) and I was hoping I wouldn't have to drink/wear that much for the next visit. I could lose 5 pounds easy this month just by what I was wearing extra (no I didn't wear weights). My goal was about 11 pounds over the 6 mo. Is this considered too much for insurance...what the heck is an OK amout? Is the pre-op diet included in your 6 mo.? What if I lose even more on the pre-op diet? :tongue2:

In one of the seminars I attended they said they had a great candidate denied by insurance because she gained one pound. Just don't gain

Thinking of you this morning. Sending you best wishes! Let us know how it went when you're on your feet again. -BG

Dag! I think Magee called on the 10th day for me. Work on that paper...it will distract you! And you have temple to look forward to tonight! Hope you feel better BFF BG