Bypass2Freedom

Hello Just on this here - surgery is a very personal decision for each person, and my reasons for surgery may not match yours, and that is okay! Surgery would not be recommended or even proceeded with by a surgeon unless it were something that would benefit your health, regardless as to whether or not you're happy with yourself (and it is amazing that you are, we should all love ourselves regardless of our weight!). I'd say that you are better off talking to your GP/surgeon again, be open and honest about your concerns and get some professional advice. Surgery is a big step and it is a life-changing decision, so you need to be sure that it is what you want to do. I am due to have my surgery in May this year, and it is something I used to be so against 2 years ago! But, I know that this is what I need to do for my health and my wellbeing.

Hello all, I had my first negative comment yesterday from a member of my partner's family. I was talking about my surgery (as someone else in their family had also had WLS), and this individual spoke up and said to me: "ah, you don't have the will power to do it yourself then?". I was just a bit taken aback if I am honest. I had to correct her (not that I have to justify myself to anyone), in saying that I had exhausted all my options, and other conditions I have mean that WLS is the only way for me. I know we shouldn't take things that others say to heart, but I can just predict that this is going to be the mindset of most people who do not understand what it is like to be obese, and to struggle every day. How have some of you dealt with comments such as these?

Hey all, I am definitely nervous about this if I am honest! I have never been a fan of my body, and although I desperately want to be smaller, I do worry what that will look like. I know it won't match up to how I want it to in my head. I am however going to start saving up for surgery so that I can have a full body lift & probably breast surgery (I am currently a UK 38GG so I KNOW my tiddys are gonna shrink!

I think my moment was when I realised my behaviour had changed. I'd stopped going outside, stopped socialising, was no longer posting selfies (which I am a great lover of doing haha), and I no longer felt comfortable wearing anything other then leggings and a long top. It was as if I had just given up. Once I tapped into this feeling, I realised that I no longer connect with my body as it is, I feel disassociated from it. I then made the decision to get my surgery booked in for this year!

Welcome! I am also a newbie and pre-op! I have my surgery booked for May this year and I am so excited! I have probably gained weight, but I really am reluctant to weigh myself as I know it will push me into a negative mindset. At the moment I am feeling very out-of-body knowing that I'll be having surgery, and come late this year I probably won't even recognise myself! How are you finding things at the moment?

Amazing post I love how supportive you are of your wife, and the fact that it seems to go both ways! It is so important to show up for one another, and see this as not only an individual journey, but one that you are on together. My partner is a serial snacker, and the house is always full of things like cakes, sweets, chocolate & crisps. Everything that is my weakness! I am hoping that when I have had my surgery this year, I will get his support as much as you have given your wife support. Thank you for posting!

Thank you God, it sounds like you have been through a lot, but that is a testament to you that you are here and still fighting, regardless of the horrible things others have put you through. You deserve better than all of that, so I am glad you got out and you have found love for someone else and for yourself. I hope your surgery goes well! x

Thank you! You have put it perfectly - I don't understand how it is still such a stigmatised and poorly understood thing! It is absolutely shattering for people who feel like they are stuck, and I know that I definitely do feel that way! Thank you ❤️ I honestly really appreciate that x

Thank you for your response I think this is definitely something I am going to have to work on - I live right opposite a corner shop and every type of snack is there so it is going to be a challenge!

That is a relief! You have hit the nail on the head with that - unfortunately the world isn't made for people of a bigger size, which is awful! Oh wow - it is interesting to see the differences in what surgeons recommend! I know a lot of people in the UK are a massive fan of protein shakes (myself included), so I shall have to keep an eye on what is recommended! Strawberry and banana smoothies were something my dad always used to make me and I love them! Adding peanut butter to that sounds amazing. Very much so! Thank you

**Trigger warning: domestic abuse** My name is Georgia, I am 27, and I have been 'bigger' for my entire adult life, and a lot of my childhood too. I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) insulin resistant type, and an Underactive Thyroid, both of which cause me to put on weight quickly, retain weight, and makes losing weight extremely difficult. I can't even remember the countless amounts of fad diets I have been on, or the amount of times I have tried to lose weight, but failed again and again. When I was 18 I was going to the gym 5-6 times a week for over an hour, I was doing HIIT training and Tai Chi, and I was jogging, eating well etc, but I still only managed to lose 2 stone in a year - make it make sense! I didn't know back then that I had underlying conditions that made it hard for me to lose weight, so I internalised a lot of the guilt in not being able to get healthy, and it resulted in me putting on around 6 stone from then until now. I was also a victim of domestic abuse/violence, and a lot of the verbal abuse that I suffered was centred around my weight - constantly being told by my ex-partner that I was fat, he would pinch my thighs, tummy, arms etc, telling me he was seeing how many inches I could lose. It completely broke me, and I started binge eating in secret. He ended up leaving me, telling me that he could no longer be with me due to my weight and how it made me sexually unattractive. I think I am probably just over 20 stone now. My back hurts when I walk, I cannot look in any mirrors without feeling low, I don't feel comfortable going out in public, and I am exhausted all the time. Every time I went to my GP about something, I was always told I needed to lose weight, as if it were a miracle cure and so simple to do just by trying hard enough. It was always blamed on me not putting in enough effort - and those in the UK will know that the NHS isn't a simple thing to navigate and the waiting lists for obesity support are long and often disheartening. Around 2 years ago I was put on a waiting list for weight loss management with the NHS. I was finally accepted in September of 2023. This is a year long commitment to the weight loss management pathway (Tier 3), in which you have to lose 5% of your weight in order to then be put on to another waiting list for a referral for the actual WLS (Tier 4). I have been told that this can take a further 4-6 years. I had a harrowing thought that by the time my WLS actually came around, I'd be well into my 30s, still desperately unhappy with myself, and I would have put on even more weight and probably be immobile. I can no longer do this to myself. I deserve better. I made the decision to look into private weight loss surgery, and I had a free consultation with a recommended surgeon just before Christmas 2023. This was genuinely the first time that a medical professional sat me down and talked to me with some humanity about my weight. He told me that with my conditions (particularly the insulin resistance, and hormonal imbalance), that my metabolic rate needed an entire reset, and this was not possible to do without surgical intervention. He explained that the difficulties I have had in trying to lose weight and being unable to, are not my fault (though of course I accept responsibility that getting here in the first place is my fault), and that surgery is recommended as perhaps the only thing that will enable me to lose the weight. I have never felt so seen, and so heard. I booked in my surgery for May 2024 there and then. So, now I start my journey, and I was looking for support, and here I am. I look forward to posting on here and using this thread to update everyone once I have had my surgery! I am quite an open and honest person, so if anyone wants to reach out to talk, my inbox is open

Hey lovely! So I have the following piercings, I will rate them by my personal pain & healing process!: Philtrum - this one was quite a painful facial piercing. Around 8/10. The healing was a little rough, lots of swelling. But by far one of my favourite piercings. Septum - honestly minimal pain on this one! 2/10 when getting it pierced. Healing was a breeze too. I forgot it was there haha! Labret - this one was probably 3/10, healing was quick and quite painless too Conch - pain was more so a 4/10, healing was longer as it is through cartilage but as long as I didn't sleep on my ear it was fine! Tragus - pain again was around a 4/10, but the healing process was a bit fussy. Sometimes flares up with pain if I sleep on it. Venom (double tongue piercing) - this was about a 7/10 getting pierced, but my god, the healing process was awful. I really do not recommend getting this one if you have not had any other piercings before! The healing was a long process, and I couldn't eat anything more than fluids & puree's for weeks until the swelling and pain had gone. It was a lot of pain. But, with all that being said, it is my most favourite piercing out of them all! All I would say is that you should research the piercer you are planning to see, look at reviews and make sure you have a consultation with them if they offer it to see which piercings may work for your anatomy Piercers should use implant grade titanium, preferably internally threaded jewellery But genuinely go for it! I love my piercings and they are such a fun way to express yourself!

This is really lovely to read - congratulations and well done for putting yourself first

That is so disheartening to hear - and unfortunately, it seems to be the mindset of a lot of people. Internalised (and often externalised) fatphobia is a thing. The fact that people feel they have the right to comment on your body whilst we present as bigger is bad enough, but to then also do so to your face retrospectively is horrible. It is one of the things that I am worried about for when I do have surgery, and I am visibly smaller - I know for a fact people will comment in the place I work, and I already feel defensive over future-me! A sort of feeling of: "If you didn't have the time for me when I was bigger, then you don't deserve to know me now I am smaller". I hope you are alright after experiencing this. No one should have to go through that.

That makes a lot of sense - I thankfully only really like no sugar fizzy drinks, but I know they come with their own downsides! I suppose it is about trying things and seeing what your new stomach likes and dislikes!

This is genuinely so encouraging to see - I also have PCOS and the struggle is real! I am so happy for you!

I haven't had my surgery yet, but honestly some of the things I am most looking forward to are these: being able to have most bath towels (especially ones at hotels) fit around me with no gaps. being able to wear my partner's clothes. not having to use my own weight as a way to get momentum to get off of a sofa. to be able to walk up a flight of stairs, or even just alongside my friends when we are walking without feeling out of breath and sweaty! Reading everyone's NSV's has been really encouraging. I can't wait to have my own!

Hello, and thank you for your advice :) These are some things I hadn't even thought of! I am admittedly awful when it comes to snacking and my water intake is extremely low, so it would make sense to start changing my habits now. How did you find adjusting to the mental hunger and any cravings?

Hello :) I hope so! I feel so impatient, kind of like an out-of-body experience. I don't even feel like my current body is mine anymore, it is as if I am trapped! (I probably sound mad haha). I have heard of people saying their tastes change which is so interesting! I have also heard you aren't able to drink fizzy or cold drinks anymore? I have admittedly already seen some horror stories (mainly on TikTok), but I am the type of person who looks at the facts and figures, and the success rates are so high, it is just that unfortunately people are more interested in hearing about the bad, compared to the good! Thank you for the advice - it really is appreciated. I will definitely clean my place before the surgery!

Hello all, I am new here, and I am booked in to have my Gastric Bypass on 14/05/24 in the UK (private). I have been overweight my entire life, and I have never known what it is to be 'skinny' - I feel like this is my first glimpse of freedom in getting the surgery booked. Has anyone got any advice as to how to prepare for the surgery, for example, changing your mindset, things you wish you had done differently etc. I am feeling so impatient! I really can't wait to start this new chapter of my life!