Merlot

So I was 25lbs away from my goal a year ago. Just 25lbs. If I wasn't hit with catastrophe after catastrophe, I'd be at my goal now. But those things happened. And it's going to be very public. It's going to be on Netflix and everyone will see my body. All the puckered and loose skin. All the fat rolls. All my tears and trauma. All the confidence I faked so nobody could break me down. But it was supposed to be okay because the plastic surgery was going to fix it. Make my new life possible. I learned after exposing everything, that no plastic surgery would happen. The cameras caught it all. And I started drinking to cope with the depression. I started eating junk food. I had nobody to turn to. I gained 28lbs. Now, I've started counseling. I'm rebuilding my life. Today, I'm starting this journey again. 53lbs to my goal. Feels like a mountain and I wake up every day feeling like I can not do this. But I have to keep trying. I need encouragement, advice...anything.

My advice for you and whatever it’s worth is Don’t ever let anyone make you feel like less then you are. You take care of you and F.ck everyone else and there hurtful remarks because at the end of the day we have to at least appreciate ourselves and love ourselves for who we are at any moment. No one else’s opinion matters. Not even the ones we love because sometimes they can say or do things that hurt and don’t even realize they are doing it. Stand strong! Especially when it’s hard! We are hear to listen and I won’t judge. ESPECIALLY here ya know we are all in the same boats. People that live in Glass houses should not throw stones. Chin up you got this!

So I was 25lbs away from my goal a year ago. Just 25lbs. If I wasn't hit with catastrophe after catastrophe, I'd be at my goal now. But those things happened. And it's going to be very public. It's going to be on Netflix and everyone will see my body. All the puckered and loose skin. All the fat rolls. All my tears and trauma. All the confidence I faked so nobody could break me down. But it was supposed to be okay because the plastic surgery was going to fix it. Make my new life possible. I learned after exposing everything, that no plastic surgery would happen. The cameras caught it all. And I started drinking to cope with the depression. I started eating junk food. I had nobody to turn to. I gained 28lbs. Now, I've started counseling. I'm rebuilding my life. Today, I'm starting this journey again. 53lbs to my goal. Feels like a mountain and I wake up every day feeling like I can not do this. But I have to keep trying. I need encouragement, advice...anything.