gadgetlady

I'm so sorry :-( Please know that the OP's experience is not the norm (some may experience it for a LIMITED amount of time) and something is wrong with her band or the amount of fill. We happy bandsters do not our lives over the toilet! I certainly wouldn't be happy if I even had to spend 10 minutes a month over the toilet!

My 7yo just came up to the computer, looked at the photo, and said, "That's Rachel Ray!" LOL!

I just came back from a slight unfill today and was reminded of how much I LOVE my doctor! I also love that fills are free for life

Thank you (and others on this thread) for your support. The arrow missed its mark because I know the reason for my lack of speedy loss (could it be the pint of Rocky Road Haagen Dazs ice cream I had last night after dinner?) and it has nothing to do with not being tight enough. In fact, I just had a slight unfill today (.2 cc) because I was too tight. I'm happy losing 1 lb a month with no exercise and eating what I want. When my schedule eases up this November, I'm going to get more serious about exercise and watching what I eat. But again, I appreciate all of the words in my defense.

LOL! Tell us how you really feel, Deanna {bwg} I'll tell you how *I* really feel. For me, in my marriage, I consider porn to be adultery. If my husband were going elsewhere for sex, whether that be a photo, the internet, a hooker, or the next-door neighbor, I would consider it adultery. And my husband agrees.

I'm in a waiting room right now waiting for an unfill , but I'll see if I can get my husband to join LBT and chime in on this subject when I get home.

This really says it all. The pregnant woman is a mother. She has a child. When a pregnant woman cites as her reason for abortion that she's "not ready to be a mother", she's missed the boat. She ALREADY IS a mother. Her choice is whether she's the mother of a dead baby or a live baby.

I literally have tears in my eyes as I read what you ladies are going through. Do your husbands understand how this is destroying you? Have you told them that they are choosing fantasies over you, and that those photos aren't even REAL? They are retouched, airbrushed, and totally unnatural? Sex doesn't determine the course of a relationship, but it is a barometer to what's going on. If your husband doesn't concern himself with your physical pleasure, if it's not important to him, if the only thing he desires is physical release through porn/masturbation, if he doesn't respect your needs, if you cry out to him for companionship and he ignores you, then he needs a wake-up call big time. While I don't believe marriage is around just to make people happy, I also believe that it shouldn't be destructive of one's psyche.

It IS just a tool, but based on MY experience you will lose some weight just because the quantity of food you can eat physically MUST be curtailed. I haven't exercised pretty much at all, and I eat a lot of sugar and soft foods, so I haven't lost what I should. I'm happy, though, losing about 1 lb/month right now with virtually no work. I don't have time to focus on this in my life right now. But knowing I won't GAIN because I just plain can't overeat makes me really happy!

I don't know if I have any ideas, but I can tell you that for a lot of people, porn destroys their sex lives. The problem with porn is not only that it sets up unrealistic images for men, but also that the longer porn is associated with sexual feelings, the more porn is REQUIRED to HAVE those feelings. Just like all of those things they told us in our early weight loss days, like don't go to the refrigerator when you're bored because then you'll associate boredom with eating, the same is true of sex. It IS good that he doesn't hide it from you because that means at least you have an honest relationship, but it isn't good of course for your psyche and feelings about yourself, and of course it isn't good for him either to have that addiction. The problem is that if he doesn't see anything wrong with it, it's unlikely to change. It appears you communicate well; have you explained to him that you feel he's substituting other women (albeit glossy magazine or internet ones) for you and that you feel like you're not good enough? Perhaps he doesn't understand that. I would suggest making sure he knows just how much he's hurting you with his actions, and his sneaky behavior of getting the porn for free is no big win for your marriage.

Good point, Chickie. Try also drinking some Aloe Vera juice. That tends to calm my insides down whenever I'm swollen.

I have lost about 40 lbs. in 1.5 years, yes, but not because I'm not tight enough. It's because I don't exercise at all and I eat too many sweets. I'm in a time in my life right now where that's just the way it is. I still love my band and I still have restriction (in fact, I'm going for a slight unfill tomorrow). I can eat steak but not if I don't chew it well, but there certainly are other things (bread, many vegetables, etc.) that I can't eat. Don't judge me or my experience based on weight loss alone.

Well, sure, at one time or another until you figure out what you can tolerate and you get the right restriction and you learn how to chew enough and take small enough bites. That's what it's all about. The implication from your post was that this is the way life is going to be for everyone, forever, and that it's awful and no one ever talks about it. If you do a search on this board, you will find lots of stuff about PB's and chewing and small bites and what kind of foods do and don't go down well. I'm sorry I misunderstood; your original post seemed to imply this was a permanent situation.

I'm sorry you are having problems, but please remember that this is YOUR experience. Not everyone has the same experience. For example, I do fine with steak and chicken. I don't really spend any time over the toilet at all. THE TRUTH is everyone experiences band life differently.

Sunta, when the title of your thread is "Stop having so many damn kids; population control anyone?", it doesn't convey sentiments of rationality and personal choice. It conveys a presumption about kids ("damn kids") and a political advocacy ("population control"). While you may have said after your original post that you don't advocate enforced population control, I'm sure you can see how the title of the thread can set people off.

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I highly recommend Dr. Quebbemann at The N.E.W. Program Southern California - Gastric bypass, Lap-Band, Weight loss, Adolescent Obesity. He is outstanding. He's in Newport Beach right off the 73 freeway.

Thank you lepez; I am really just an incredibly blessed person who wants to share a little bit God gave me a heart for people so I do what He tells me to do. I have a little story for you. My uncle recently went for a massage, but he's not the type you would normally think would be the "spa" type. I asked my aunt how she got him in there for the massage. She said, "It was simple. I scheduled an appointment for him on the same day I was going in for one, and I told him he'd need to be available to drive me there and wait for me. Then on the morning of the appointment, I told him he had an appointment for a massage. He didn't want to do it, but when I told him the appointment was non-cancellable and he'd have to pay for the massage whether he got it or not, he decided to do it." Now I'm not suggesting you lie to your husband, but knowing that most people hate to waste money, what would happen if you surprised him with it? Presented it as a done deal -- "someone gave me this weekend getaway and I already made the reservations." Or perhaps you just tell him to save the weekend because you have something special planned? The other option is to explain to him that you're at your wit's end and if he doesn't do something, everything's going to hit the fan. I'm not saying the marriage weekend is the "something" that needs to be done, but whatever you need to do for your sanity may be it. Blessings to you. You and your husband are in my prayers.

Evolution is unproven. So is Creation Science. They are both theories. My kids learn about both theories, and the science, or lack thereof, behind both.

Uh, yeah, the facts it establishes are what elements of a human life are present at a particular time. This is the most ridiculous statement I have ever heard. Since when does one person's conscience determine whether another person is alive? If I truly, in my deepest moments of introspection, believe that a child under the age of 2 years is not alive because he cannot communicate properly with me, does that make him not alive? No, it makes me WRONG. That decision only applies when one life is not taking another. My very favorite bumper sticker says, quite simply: The baby is NOT your body

REPOST My husband and I would like to bless two married couples from LBT with a "Weekend to Remember" marriage enrichment conference. You can get more information about it at Overview - Marriage Conference - Weekend to Remember. We will cover the cost of the conference for the weekend. You will need to cover transportation and hotel (if any). These conferences are held all over the country so most people should be able to find something close to them. Hotel arrangements may not even need to be made if the conference you attend is nearby. Go to WTR Registration - Step 1 for locations. For some testimonials of changed marriages through this conference, go to Changed Lives - Marriage Conference - Weekend to Remember. To take advantage of this offer, please email me at veryblessedlife@gmail.com. DO NOT PM ME! My PM box is almost completely full and I don't have the energy to clean it out. Please give me some details about yourself and your marriage in your email.

It sounds like the problem (among other things) is you had crappy therapists. Would you please take me up on my offer of sending some couples to a "Weekend to Remember"? I'll repost below so you can see it if you haven't already. It may not work a miracle but it's certainly worth a try! DH and I have some friends who have been married for 7 years. They have been in counseling since they first got married. Their first counselor told them they should get a divorce (!). After about 6 years, they separated. We never knew about how serious their problems were until then. It is a lot of the same things I'm hearing here: just roommates, no communication, no intimacy, etc. We brought them over to our house and counseled them ourselves for about 4 hours; they said it was the best counseling they'd ever had. (No, we are not degreed or formally trained to do it; we just have a good understanding of human nature and are blessed with an exceptional marriage). We got them to a GOOD counselor and they are now back together, their marriage is transformed, and they're trying to have children. All that is to say, there is hope for every marriage if the parties are willing to try to work on it. DH and I tried the same thing with another couple and they ended up divorced; they weren't willing to try anymore. But we firmly believe that with commitment and the willingness to work towards a common goal, every marriage can be outstanding.

Don't question your memory Abortion was legal in some states, one of them California, before the Roe v. Wade and Doe v. Bolton in 1972, which decriminalized abortion throughout the entire 9 months of pregnancy in every state in the US.

Science has already proved it. There is no honest scientist in the WORLD who will pinpoint the beginning of human life at any place other than conception. The real argument is not about the presence of human life, but rather about the value of that life.

Thank you for sharing your story with us, L8BloomR. I picked this phrase out particularly because sometimes when we women find ourselves in the horrible situation of being pregnant when we don't want to, abortion seems like an "easy" way out. I'm not saying abortion is ever easy, but to a scared woman who is grasping at anything to get out of a difficult situation, it can seem like it has a finality to it. What most women forget, or never know, is that the first trimester of pregnancy is one of the most emotional and hormonal times of a woman's life -- and therefore crises are often magnified. I'm not saying some women don't find themselves in dire situations -- obviously they do -- but that the short-sighted vision of a woman in a crisis situation is not always 20/20. I think anyone who's had a pregnancy scare when they didn't want to be pregnant has thought about abortion -- whether it be a fleeting thought or a serious one. It is therefore never our place to judge, but rather to offer solutions and alternatives.