Dknal2

I'm blushing... thank you so much.

My hubby will not do counseling. I have begged and cried about it and just plain pleaded with him. To no avail though. I think I'm just trying to hold on so as not to feel like I failed at this . I don't know.

Thank you so much for the support.

Big or small, someone else can still attempt to infiltrate your union. So, that's why hubby should be good to his wife, love and respect her so that there is no room for infiltration regardless of her size. I can't fix his insecurities and I'm not trying to anymore. I'm me love me or leave me if I'm not want you want anymore. Point blank period

It's like Darn if you do and darn if you don't . My husband is thin and has been since high school so he's not a big guy which also hinders his understanding of being overweight. I am not at goal either and have 22 lbs to go until goal. I will not let anyone stop me from attaining it. I am pushing forward and you should do the same. I am taking control of my life and so are you. I will keep you in my prayers for strength because we are gonna do this with or without them.

I agree. This transformation has been mind, body and soul for me. I just want to be happy now and live my life.

Thank you so much. I am 39 as well and my 20 year old son went with me to have my surgery and was very supportive for 5 days.... I live in Alabama but my surgery was in Texas. It's never too late to make a change in life , be it with weight or whatever. I am not on FB but I will send a private message and thanks for support. I really find this forum to be so helpful to me. I love you guys for being such good people that genuinely care. It's a true blessing.

Hi namesake, I was not heavy . I was 145 lbs when we met( I was a cheerleader in high school when he n I started dating). Then I left for the army and bulked up to 160 lbs in basic but all muscle. He told me the other day that when I came back from basic I was about this weight but way thicker and I had an awesome butt. I don't have as much as I used too but I'm still in the game with a little butt, lol. Im not a bad looking female and my body is very much together at the great age of 39 May I add so I just feel really bad that he is trying to make me feel inferior to him by hinting little insults at me. I'm proud of this body I worked hard for it. No one is gonna downplay what I have done to attain it.

Thank you so much for the support. I indeed understand his insecurities but still not excusing his words or actions that are so hurtful. I'm trying to give this a chance n see if it can be a solution but if not, life goes on

Thank you so much. You are so right. My thoughts on love and being loved have really changed. Crap I used to accept I'm not willing to accept anymore. I know I deserve better ... big or small... we deserve respect n love from our significant others. I blame myself for accepting a lot of unacceptable behaviors over the years for different reasons but I still let crap go when I shouldn't have . But mind, body and spirit, I am a different me. I'm just trying to see what my next steps need to be. God will keep me and guide me to do the best thing for me.

Thank you so much. What an insightful reply. I have had control issues with my hubby for a while and the monster had reared its head so much more since surgery. I think he like fatter me because that made him feel secure because he would tell me how great I looked when I knew I didn't look great. But now I can count on my fingers how many times he has really complimented my body. When I lost like 15 lbs he was on me like white on rice but now I have gotten way smaller and he never compliments me about how my body looks at all... only when I'm going to church he tells me I look pretty and that's because my makeup is on and hair fixed cute. But nothing about how my body looks. I am just really facing the reality of maybe my marriage is gonna end because he is too stubborn for counseling and tells me he doesn't need it but I do cuz I'm too sensitive about everything so I'm crazy. I pray for my marriage daily and I know God wants us to be happy and have peace in our hearts as well as our home. He grants us peace. I'm just pondering on how long do I continue to be unhappy. Not yo mention I just caught him talking to a girl on Facebook that was very thick . He says he was mad at an argument but im like so you give your number out to a girl to chat with over our argument, which wasn't even a bad argument. So I'm looking like a dummy yet again. But I pray for strength and for God to lead my next steps because I'm almost positive I will be single before this year is done.sad but true.

Maybe they aren't jealous but it's been my experience that 9/10 there are envious feelings that lead people to make the comments that they make regarding this surgery. But if they are just clueless, then try educating them on why you have to make different food choices and the size of your stomach and all that good stuff. Good luck.

Yes, people will be very CONCERNED ( in my sarcastic voice) about your eating habits now. I know most of the time it's jealousy because you were rave enough to take the bull by the horn and change your life for a healthier lifestyle. Brush the haters off and keep working. You owe no one anything . I have had so many co workers/ friends make little snide remarks about my food choices and surgery as well as my clothes being too big and I just say something bk to them to shut them up. This is my journey and will not be interrupted by jealous people who want to take me down.... not gonna happen. FYI, if they had opportunity to switch places they would in a heartbeat. Stay strong n keep pushing to goal.

Well BP FAM , I'm back again with a rant. My husband and I were talking last night and he made comments in how he wished I never had this surgery. He stated that my butt has gone almost away and he felt all unneeded to do was tone up and lose my belly initially. Well, first of all, I don't know how you tone up 242 lbs with BMI 0f 39( which was my initial weight and BMI). So.... he proceeded to run his mouth about all the things I can't do like drink gallons of sweet tea, eat cake and Cookies, go to restaurants and eat appetizer , entree and dessert.. You know all of the healthy stuff that led me to be 242 lbs in the first place. Well, I was really hurt by his comments. My rebuttal was how much healthier I am , I am a lose size 10 as opposed to a tight size 16, I am no longer out of breath with walking 20 feet and I am able to exercise. I like how my body has changed and I told him I love my size. Well, he said "you don't have to be attracted to you, I do and you only needed to lose a little belly but now your butt has gone down tremendously " well needless to say I was pushed to my breaking point. I was like if you don't like what you see, go and find you a thick chic with a donkey's ass. I'm not even at goal yet so I'm gonna lose more and just ticked that he would say that to me which made me feel a lil insecure about my looks. Then I snapped out of it. I have posted pics on my other forums but I will put my last one here as well. Not tooting my own horn but I worked hard for these results . I had surgery in Dec 2016. I am just like dang I can't win for losing .i really thought I was doing good . My pics show one week after surgery on left, middle is 1 1/2 months post op and last pic on right was about 2 weeks ago.

Lol,,,, thanks hun.

Thank you so much..but I don't do the gym I use my elliptical 3-4 times a week, I do an exercises and now I am working on my arms n legs.. squats for legs and an apple app for my arms. I don't do much and the scale says I should look bigger but long ago when I weighed 145 I looked very similar. This surgery makes our weight loss a little more dramatic in my opinion because the fat is burning off like mad.. I wish you the best and lets all make goal and keep each other motivated in the process.

I am so honored to be an inspiration to others. I am working hard just to be one of the ones that really worked this sleeve and took full advantage of this opportunity. I am not perfect by any means but I am doing my best to follow my diet and live a little too, lol. I thank you all motivating me to keep pushing

Thank you so much and sure I will share it.

Thank you ?.. I appreciate the motivation.

Thank you, I'm trying to get a 6 pack lol with this an challenge. I'm gonna post my 3 month results

Thank you so much , I'm trying my best to work this sleeve

Thank you so much ... I told my son I can knock him out now, lol. Just kidding but thanks for the motivation. I need and so appreciate it.

Okay I have been doing an ab challenge for just a couple of weeks that my son sent me in an email... along with my routine exercise as well as cardio. I just wanted to post a progress pic to show that I am getting a lil cut up in the abdomen area. This is a total NSV for me. I don't know why Bariatric patients weight loss is different than when a person who has not had surgery loses weight. I am 174 lbs and I know some people that say they are 160 or high 150's and I look as small if not smaller. Can't wait to see what I look like when I hit goal weight of 150 lbs. I Just wanted to share my pics with my BP FAM. Please excuse all the mail on my dresser in the second pic. I keep my mail for centuries, lol.

I'm not flying past you, lol. But thanks for the compliment.... I exercise like 3 or 4 times a week by doing cardio on my elliptical as well as focusing on my abs. I am now putting focus on my arms too because I'm noticing a little sagging skin there but hey gotta take good with the bad . You can look me up to check out my pics on posts that I have placed on here to see my progress . I'm doing ok with food now but I am very selective and still can't eat many different foods so I stick to the basic high protein foods that are on my list from surgeon like tuna, tilapia, chili, grilled chicken , Greek yogurt and veggies. We are both doing great and are on the losers bench which is the most important thing. Stay positive and keep in touch.

Erika we are almost surgery twins... I had my surgery in dec 5 and my weight was 219 and currently 174... I am a slower loser of lbs as well but my inches are flying off ... so I try to celebrate victories in other ways as well.. congrats on the loss and keep up the good work?