MickATL

The fact that we EXPECT people to have a problem with it or just say a name and not say they are our partner/boyfriend/girlfriend/etc. is called the "heterosexual priviledge". That str8 people can talk about their husband and that's okay. It's not considered "personal" business. Just like your user ID says you are someone's mom which could imply your str8. For me, I say it takes mental energy to try and hide parts of my life that I shouldn't have to. If you don't like it, I'll spend my money somewhere else. But our personal lives are a BIG part of how we live, who we eat with, why we overeat sometimes and an inability to be completely honest about all of those things is not healthy. Talking about our relationships, how food is involved and how we socialize around food helps us learn, evolve and grow through the weight loss surgery process.
If people don't like it, find someone who doesn't care. I don't think my surgeon needs to be gay. He just needs to be good at what he does. But me having to hide the fact that I have a boyfriend because I think he'd have a problem with it, means I wouldn't use him. In my case, I am as out loud and proud as they come and nobody ever has a problem with it. Probably because I don't.

Good for you Sadie! That's how it should be. I remember first coming out and talking about "the heterosexual priveledge" which is to talk about kids, hubby, in-laws at work but gay peole are supposed to keep their personal lives to themselves. WTF?!?!? If you talk about your husband at work, I should be able to talk about my boyfriend.
I have stopped referring to him as my partner. In the South, people always ask me "Partner??? What kinda business y'all in?" I find that boyfriend gets the point across without using the term lover which is just a sexual term in my book.
Start practicing eating slowly, taking small bites, chewing your food thoroughly and, if you aren't... start exercising. It will help with recovery and it's a major aid in helping the weight come off post-op!
Congratulations on your date!!!

I'm in conservative Atlanta. When I went in for my pre-op tests, the psych consult required your support person to come with you. I brought my partner of 13 years. They wanted him to hear what my eating requirements were going to be and the kind of support I would need post-op. I guess if you aren't out in your life, then what's the point of telling someone who's going to cut you open, place a device and send you one your way? I'm out to everyone. My attitude, if it's not a problem for me, it shouldn't be for you. If it is, then I'd rather go somewhere else. It takes energy to hide things. To play the pronoun game. Its 2008. Believe me, you aren't the first queer patient they've had. If it's a big ugly secret for you, it will be for others.
I'm out to the dietician, on the yahoo lap band groups I post on and basically everywhere. The people that have a problem with it probably don't reply to my posts but... I have alot of friends on Yahoo and OH and here and I don't skirt the issue. I think people like me regardless of my orientation. It's a part of who I am. Denying it would be like denying I am male. I used to think people didn't need to know. What does it have to do with anything? It has everything to do with everything! My sexuality is interwoven into my character, my life, my personality and me denying it sends subconscious messages to psyche that says I am ashamed of who I am and other people are right for having a problem with it.