SkinnyDown

Hi Lena, Welcome!

Where did the time go? I just had my surgical preop training, and my last preop dietary appt. today. My surgery is on the 20th, too. Next week Wednesday!!! I'm so excited. It's been a long journey already, just to get to this point. Keep in touch ... lots of May 20th people it seems.

I've noticed a lot of variance in what people have to do to get WLS. I've been in my program since September 2014, and my surgery is May 20. Some people have hardly any program time, and are scheduled for surgery in a couple months. I don't understand why it's so different. I wonder if there is any difference in end results. Or in ability to keep the weight off long term. I guess it made me a bit angry at first at how long I had to wait, and how much I had to do. But now I am grateful for the length of the program and process I have gone through. It gave me time to really consider what I was doing. But then again, my last dietary appointment my nutritionist told me she had a man in her office, a week after surgery, trying to eat shrimp. So maybe it makes no difference. I've had more time to really work on issues I have with food, with a therapist. (my own idea). It has also given me time to give up things I needed to, like smoking, caffeine, soda etc. It's been a long journey already, but I think it prepared me well. I have a 10 day liquid diet that I start on Monday. I believe that's going to help to ready me even more. The real reason for the long liquid diet is to shrink the liver, so the surgeon has more room to work. Perhaps not everyone needs that.

I want to clarify the reason I am not telling a lot of people. The few people I have already told have for the most part, been completely understanding of the use of bariatric surgery as a tool. They are totally onboard. There have been a few people though who have told me horror stories of people dying, things going wrong, people regaining etc. And those who have come out and said, "You will not be the same person, and I don't want you to change." That is what I want to avoid. There is something very unfortunate in humans that makes people not want to see others do well. Not everyone is like that, but there are some. This is why an addict can't hang out with their addict friends once they get clean. They will start hearing, "Come on, one time isn't going to hurt." or "Just one more time, for old times sake." People tend to want to keep you at their level. Psych 101 stuff. I'm not ashamed of having this surgery. This has been a long time coming. This has been a lifetime of losing 100 lbs and gaining it back ...over and over. This has been a lifetime of struggle against Hashimoto's and PCOD. It's my time, is how I think of it. It's my time to do something for myself that will be a long lasting permanent change. I am so excited for this. I don't want anyone to try to bring me down and burst my bubble of positivity. Because THAT is what is going to get me through this. There will be in my world, a proper time to tell people, after the surgery.

I have only told a few people closest to me, and my family. I always add that I am not telling many people, so please keep it private. The problem I just realized is my family telling others I do not want to know. One of my sister's said she may have told a neighbor of mine, and I am so upset about that. I don't need anyone's input or discouragement or opinions, that is why I chose to only tell a few people. Anyone else is getting told I am having "abdominal surgery" since I had a previous colon resection, I think most people just think it has to do with that. That is all they need to know. Now, if I can just keep my family quiet about it. Just because everyone else announces every bowel movement they make on FB, doesn't mean I'm interested in sharing this private information with the world. Not even everyone in my family is happy about what I am doing. Makes things much more difficult.

I changed a few things. On my own, I quit smoking after 30 years. I've been smoke free for over a year now, in anticipation for this surgery and future knee surgeries. I knew they wouldn't do either if I kept smoking. I have recorded everything I have eaten for the past 8 months. (people who do are more successful with wls, so I am told) I have given up all caffeine. I have given up soda. I stopped drinking before during and after meals (as instructed). I take in 64+ oz Water daily, (not sure how I am going to do that with a tiny stomach! lol) I stopped buying junk, and started opting for quality over quantity. I have seen a therapist twice monthly, (my idea) to work on issues I have with food. I started eating Breakfast. I do the same Protein shake daily, that I will have to do 5 times a day for my liquid diet. I love it. (hope I still love it after 10 days of it) None of it was easy. I still have an occasional diet coke, but I do know after surgery it's off limits for good. Most of the foods that I have said..."oh, I need to do this one last time" have been huge disappointments. I thought they would be so great, but I'm really at this point so tired of food. I think that means I'm in a good place in my head to have this surgery. Great question, thanks for asking it, NDAO.

Hi! My surgery date is the same as yours, SeattleDeb! Nice to know I won't be alone in this. I'll think about you on that day. Well wishes and a speedy recovery!

I was told for my pre-op liquid diet I have to use 2% milk, because I would need that extra fat to function correctly. I listen pretty closely to what I am being told by the professionals I see. I've been doing the Protein drinks since the beginning of this journey, because I had such a hard time eating Breakfast, so I am very used to having a Protein Drink to start out my day. Now I have to do that 5 times a day for 10 days.

They told me it would take 2 weeks for approval. I got a call exactly one month later. I even called after 2 weeks passed, but they said it was still under review by the insurance co. Hang in there, just when I was about to give up, I got a call from the surgical dept. to schedule my surgery.

I had a drain for a previous surgery for about a week, and it didn't hurt coming out. I hate catheters, always happy when they are removed. I'm not sure if I'll have either a drain or catheter for my bypass, but I guess I'll find out when I wake up.

You are all lifesavers, I feel so much better now. I am the queen of Water and ice. LOL I'm always drinking water anyway, but this makes me feel so much better that for the most part everyone here was allowed some ice chips. I'll check into the Biotene. You are all so great! Thanks again.

Thanks for the replies and well wishes! I'm very excited. I guess for me, I know it's the right thing, everyday when I get out of bed, and feel how sick I am due to so many other health issues I have due to my obesity, I know it's the right thing to do. I'm hoping....I will no longer have to take 20+ pills a day and minimum of 4 injections of insulin. Even if that were cut in half, it would be a huge improvement. I'm not doing this to get into a certain size. I'm doing this because if I don't...I won't be here much longer, and even my PCP has told me that. Not that I needed her to. I know I'm not going to last very long if I don't do something on a permanent level to help get my weight under control. I've done the lose 100 lbs and gain it back and more game, too many times, for too many years. Not sure if this is encouraging at all, but sometimes we just need to remind ourselves, I think....of what we are doing and why. food has at this point become boring and highly overrated to me. I feel I am ready. I set out to have my "last" everything I wanted, and I keep coming up very very disappointed, in how I thought it was going to make me feel. I guess I crossed that line, where I actually realized, food isn't as important or comforting as I believed it to be. Big thanks to my therapist, and the nutritionists who have put in many hours in helping me realize what I was doing in relation to food. Thanks again everyone for your support. I notice people here have buddies, I'd sure love one, if anyone is willing, to help me through this process.

Hi, I was just wondering if anyone could tell me how soon they allowed you to have ice chips or Water after surgery? I have had quite a few surgeries, and never fail to have the worst possible dry mouth afterwards, and can barely speak because my mouth and throat get so dry. Any input would be greatly appreciated. This is probably the biggest thing I am worried about. Surgery doesn't scare me, dry mouth does. LOL

May 20th! I am very excited. I was told it would take 2 weeks for insurance approval and today I hit the 4 week mark, and was really losing hope. I think I was shaking for a few hours after hearing the good news, and then called all the necessary people. I'm not telling many people, only very close friends and relatives. Those I do have to tell I am having surgery, because I can't fulfil obligations, I am just saying it's abdominal surgery, and change the subject. It's a good coverup, since I've had previous colon surgery. So....I will do a 10 day liquid diet, and I think that will be quite interesting. I've had previous ailments and surgery where it was required I couldn't eat for many days, so I think I'll be fine. I have already started packing a few things to take to the hospital. I'm so happy it's finally almost here. It's been a long journey up to this point. Any other May surgeries?

I've had people who have lost weight through bariatric surgery tell me that's what I needed. At the time....not what I wanted to hear. I was actually pretty insulted at the time. I was a 30 year smoker. I've been smoke free for over a year, and I wouldn't dream of telling others to quit. If I don't want to be around their smoke now, I leave the room. We've all seen this before, a person "reforms", and starts preaching to others to change. That's just the wrong way to do things, in my opinion. It's none of my business, what people want to do. Destructive or not...it's not my call, not my business and not my right to judge. That's just how I live my life...NOW, because I've spent a lot of time in my life trying to help people get off booze, drugs, you name it, while I was clearly addicted to food. The day I woke up and realized, I have got to do something about me first...was the day I stopped trying to help everyone else. Me first, now. I have my own addictions to deal with. It's usually always a good practice in my opinion, to stay out of other's people's business. Just my opinion.

I signed up in August of 2014 to have surgery. My first informational meeting was 9/14 after an initial consult with a bariatric nurse, I had to have 6 months worth of visits with a dietician. My last dietary appointment is on March 31st. YAY! I had an hour long consult with surgeon, 2 appointments (long appointments with a psychologist). I've had an endoscopy (yesterday), got the all clear to go ahead for surgery from the surgeon. After my last dietary appt., I have 2 more appointments to fulfil. A pre-op with a nurse who will tell me all I have to do before surgery, and another appt. with a nurse prac. who will go over all the things I do when I get home from hospital. I guess THEN I will get scheduled. Finally. It's been a long long journey.

I think there are general things to look for. Is he initiating sexual advances, in and out of the bedroom, or does he wait for you? Does he take charge and calm down a situation, or run away when things get tough/chaotic/drama filled? Is he jealous, overly possessive, insecure? You see, a true Alpha Male, knows how to create his own space. He is sure of himself, comfortable in his own skin He knows he doesn't have to use any kind of brute force, or even raise his voice to get his point across or what he wants. She's going to be so taken with him, she'll come to him. She won't need a collar, because she wouldn't stray. A true Alpha Male is in charge and in control of his own emotions, and is someone you feel safe around. He is not someone you feel you might have to protect. He is someone you know will always protect you, take care of you. He is not a chest beater, those are beta males posing as Alphas. And beta males will need more care and maintenance than an Alpha. True Alpha Males are not easy to come by. The Alpha male is the man sitting in a club, comfortable, having a drink, taking in everything, quiet, in command of himself, no sign of desperation that he even needs a woman. The beta male is the male going around from table to table, desperate, looking for any woman who will take him. Guess who generally goes home with someone...at the end of the night, The Alpha. Why? Because he didn't have to make a move, the women came to him. That's a lot of power. These are general things I look for, and have observed in men. I have been with both, Alpha and beta males. I prefer Alpha, but they have to be very strong and very in charge, or I will walk all over them. I'm a dominant female, an Alpha female. But I can submit to the right man. I'll just remind everyone reading this, this is only my experience, my opinion, and my perspective. That does not make it a Universal truth. I don't like arguing. We are all entitled to our opinion. On the 50 Shades front: I see we have our first death from a reenactment of some scene in the film. I couldn't verify if that was true or not, but it does bring up the responsibility this film has, to not glorify what is and can be very intense play, in the hands of people who have no idea what they are doing.

I couldn't agree more, @mybariatriclife. Your friend knows, of what she speaks. I saw a very funny meme about 50 shades the other day. '50 Shades of Grey is only romantic because the guy is a billionaire. If he was living in a trailer it would be a Criminal Minds episode.' It's all a matter of perspective I suppose. lol

Congratulations! Sounds like you are doing great.

Just my 2c. I haven't read the books or seen the movie, no interest, for a reason. From my own experiences, men in positions of power, don't usually want to come home and be in charge. Typically most submissive males I have had contact with, have big responsibilities in their lives, especially work. Likewise, men I know who don't have a lot of control, seek it out through domination. So imo, I don't really believe the author knew much about D/s and/or BDSM to write books about it. It is, to me, an unbelievable scenario. I think it is watered down Hollywood mush for the masses to be honest. Again, just my opinion.

They have required me to stop all caffeine. Soda, not just for caffeine, but for the carbonation. And any drinks that have caffeine. Tea, coffee etc. I'm still not even scheduled for surgery, and they had me quit soon after my first dietary appointment. I had to be off caffeinated coffee, tea soda and other drinks by my last dietary appt. which was yesterday. It wasn't easy, soda was harder than coffee, even though I only drank 2 diet Coke's per day, I still want one. Coffee, is not the same to me. Decaf and sugar free hazelnut creamer, just isn't cutting it. I switched to the sf drops in iced Water, or decaf tea with lemon, iced.

I haven't had my surgery yet, but I did have a colon resection done, a year ago due to a perforated bowel. I went many days without any food obviously, and after the surgery and started introducing even Clear liquids I had lots of bowel sounds, they say that's good. Having sounds is way better than no sounds at all. It means things are working and moving, and that's a good thing. I hope this helped a bit, of course if you have pain, you should call your Surgeon. I hope you get to feeling better soon!

I've always fared better after a big surgery, with someone staying with me. One of my sister's has volunteered to stay with me when I get home from my surgery, for a week or until I feel OK on my own, whichever comes first. Sometimes it's just nice having the company.

My surgeon told me it was slightly less risky than gallbladder surgery, which I have had years ago. About a year ago I had one of the most risky surgeries, a colon resection due to bowel perforation with a large abscess that took one of my ovaries and fallopian tube with it. Along with 1 foot of colon and rectum. I had 2 surgeries back to back by two different surgeons. (I was misdiagnosed by a gastroenterologist. She said it was constipation, and kept prescribing laxatives and enemas. I nearly died), but...I didn't. I made it. So that gives me a little more confidence that I can make it through this surgery. I'll have 3 more to go after WLS. 2 knee surgeries and then plastic surgery to remove skin. I made certain that I looked my surgeon in the eyes and told him,"if I tell you that there is something wrong and I am in extreme pain,I am counting on you to listen to me." after the fiasco I went through with the perforated bowel, I needed to make sure he was going to listen. He told me "I'm on your team, I will listen to you". That's what I needed to hear. I have full confidence in my surgeon. I think we freak ourselves out, but you have to weigh (no pun intended) the options. Will the surgery be more risky, than keeping on all this weight? You'll get your answer.

I'd check to see exactly what your team is asking for. My team decided for me I had to maintain my weight or lose. They actually sent me a letter of exactly what they expected, once they reviewed my case, and agreed to take me on as a patient. They may have been more lenient with me, because I am on 2 diabetes oral meds and 2 types of insulin. Nearly impossible to lose when on Insulin. Maybe that paired with Hashimoto's and PCOS they gave me a break. I've lost a few pounds, but I am also fluctuating wildly with pitting leg edema. Some days I can weigh as much as (5-10) lbs more or less, due to how much Water I am retaining. I don't know if any of this helps, but I'd check to make sure what was asked specifically. From your team and your insurance co.