bandster_1007

i should have said off limits after 6 weeks...of course prior to that, you are liquids, softs, etc.

my doctor did not require a nutritionist..i was supposed to go, but she was sick..so oh well. we had general rules, but the main rule was each person is different. the only thing his stresses is protein, protein, protein..and no foods are off limits, although some he really doesn't like.

haha..the last time i could wear anything of my mother's was 4th grade (and i did not become overweight until college). my mom wore a size 12 in little girls when i was that age, and she is 4'10". i couldn't even wear her shoes because she wears little girl shoe sizes. when i was in high school i was a size 5 (i was thin, but had wide hips), she wore a size 0...yuck!! now she is a 5, so maybe one day!!!

dh purchased a size medium leather coat for me for x-mas. at first, my feelings were hurt, because i didn't want to be reminded that i am fat on x-mas eve (i haven't lost weight). then the more i thought about it, the more excited i was. so, i'm hanging it in my closet where i will see it every day. (he thought that was only one size too small..thinking that i wear a large, but i wear a 1x, so....)

momma thing..how did it go????

welcome from me also. i was banded 10/18 by wellborn. not to be discouraging, but i will be honest..i lost 12 lbs and gained it back. i have not lost anymore, and i weigh exactly the same as i did the day of surgery. however, i have only had one fill. be patient..and do not miss your fill appointments (i missed from being sick). although i like dr. wellborn's staff a lot, they are very busy and if you miss an appointment you will have a hard time getting back in. ok,...now that all sounded negative and that is not how i am. be patient, the hunger will go away ..no i am not losing yet, but i am less hungry. try not to beat yourself up if you hit a plateau it only compounds the problem. good luck..let us know if you need anything!!!

i love it..but amazingly..since i posted this..we have rarely eaten any popcorn. i guess after not being able to eat it for those few weeks i kind of lost my craving..i used to want it every day.

aversion therapy would be effective i think in a percentage of cases (although i have never done a study..i would like to). it is backed by the principal of negative reinforcement (google it..you'll find lots of information). i do not know of any particular study or if aversion therapy is even a word. it is something i have thought of (although i'm sure it is not an original thought). if you force yourself to do something that you do not like with a behavior that you do not like, and you do it consistently, you will begin to associate the negative with that behavior. if you think about it, the band has basically the same philosophy. once we are to restriction, if we eat too much, we will hurt, and therefore, we will not want to eat it again. humans are trainable just like animals, we just have the ability to train ourselves. actually, with the band, a lot of people with have an aversion to a particular food due to one incidence. however, even according to my doctor, it is important to try again one day because your band changes. people learn amazingly fast, and we do not want to do anything that causes us pain or discomfort. so eat chocolate and then eat lima beans (i gag when i eat lima beans). i'm going to try this actually starting next week..we will see what happens. i will either stop liking chocolate, or i will start liking lima beans, either way it is a positive outcome. many many people, can recollect a time when they had an aversion to food..for example, even though the taste of cottage cheese is not bad, i absolutely cannot eat it because once when i was a child, i ate a whole container of it (first time i ate it), and my belly hurt for a week. i was 5 and i have not eaten cottage cheese since (unless it is cooked like in lasagna). it is the same concept.

mmmmm..that is a good idea. i absolutely love the taste of plain, hot green tea, with no sweetener (the bottled lipton ones make me gag).

denise..i've seen you mention your problem with chocolate often. you seem to really not want to like it. (i have a choco problem too, but i'm not ready to not like it). have you tried any type of aversion therapy that you do yourself? for instance, if there is a food that you hate, make yourself eat it first or right after having a piece of choco. it takes determination though and really sticking yourself to it, but eventually your brain will correlate the choco with the bad taste...or there are other ways to do it..that is just one. you know..kind of like when you drink something until you throw up horribly and then the smell of it makes you sick..same thing (although i know many people that it doesn't stop them..).

thank you for inviting me.

ok..i know this is off subject..but you have the cleanest carpet that i have ever seen.

uh..bodonkadonkbutt (spelling) suggested that i join this thread because i have posted elsewhere about my frustrations. i apologize if i am being repetitive, but i did not have time to read all 91 pages (wow..you guys are great). so, i was banded 10-18. my real name is tabatha. i live in arkansas...and i now currently weight 225 and my starting weight was 222. so, if my calculations are correct, my average weight loss is +0.375 per week. (on average, rounding to 8 weeks). can't wait until that loss is really a loss. at this point, i would love to be a slow loser, but right now i am a slow gainer..lol. little background. i had my first fill 3 weeks ago..i got 6.5 cc's. i'm not sure what size my band is b/c my doctor's office says i have a 10cc apl band, and that isn't possible, and i cannot get them to clarify. i missed my 2nd fill because i was sick with a bowel obstruction. i have a sweet tooth, and i'm working on that. there has been improvement. i was not drinking with meals at all at first, and then i would take a sip, and now i'm back down to nothing. i'm not exercising. and i'm not food journaling. i have absolutely no restriction though, i can eat 4 pieces of pizza easy and then be ready for more in 2 hours. i don't like to journal when i'm hungry all the time..at first it was fun because i wasn't starving so i could concentrate. so, i'm not losing for all the same reasons that i wasn't before i got the band. then i got the band, and i'm still now losing. my doctor tells me to be patient, and i am. i have posted some things though, but it just seems to me that unless you are a slow loser or are not losing at all then it is difficult to understand how i must feel. oh..uh..i did lose 12 lbs. post op, but gained back and then some. as for nsv's..well..i had one when i had lost and that was that i didn't have edema. now..however...i do not have any nsv's from gaining. i look forward to being in your group..as much as i hope to one day break out of your group. if i don't, now i know where i can find support. thanks tabatha (i'm 5'2", 25, from arkansas)

oh yeah..i forgot to mention..the card and the candy..earned my spot back in the bed..lol dh did joke after he told me how surprised he was and how much he appreciated it (i tend to be WAY to stubborn, and i think i have only apologized twice during our entire relationship..i think if you apologize too much it is meaningless, instead show it)..anyways..he said.."you ruined my plan..i was going to come home and piss you off again so i could get the whole bed to myself"..haha............that is his way of expressing himself..and i agree..it was pretty funny. (makes me realize how petty i am being)

oh man...where do i begin.. first let me say that i truly thank every one of you for your posts (i just finished reading..i had stopped to respond to jacks). kacee- you are right..hubby does have that fear, and he feels it is his manly duty right now to work all of the time to make up for our financial troubles..that in itself is a wall..you know..never see each other..when you do ..he's tired..i'm bloated and fat and wallowing in self pity..i'm cranky..he becomes cranky....it just goes in that cycle. and you are right, the negative is not preordained..and that was perhaps the most frustrating thing for me..is i felt like i was trapped in the "negative room" and everyone was screaming at me or looking on at me with disappointed and accusing eyes. i generally try to be positive. and i agree that the world is not always nice...as i felt like it wasn't being this morning...i could sense from your post that you must have been reading a lot of posts similar to mine (i have not been...i've only been reading my subscribed ones...time crunch). but still, now matter what your opinion is i accept it fully. just as i have a right to express myself on here, so does someone else. you know? i needed to pick myself up and stop whining..and i was trying desperately hard but i just kept falling down, and everyone around me in real life was not lending a helping hand..instead it seemed they were casting stones. perception, i believe, is 100% of the battle...this morning my perception was heavily skewed by my cortisone levels and my own self persecution and doubt. so i vented, got encouragement, and now i'm getting over it. chris- thank you for your many suggestions. i talked to my band doctor today and i was in tears. told them about eating 4 pieces of pizza..etc. and they said "it's ok". they also told me to relax and that they would normally be able to fit me in, but there are a lot of illnesses going around right now and they are having a lot of poeple coming in for unfills because they are sick. hey, i understand..if i'm ever too tight..they better get me in. however, if this continues..a second opinion might be a really good idea. thanks for telling me about the gas thing..it is horrid and it sure doesn't help in the attraction department. liz-thank you for sharing. i hope to be on here in a month or to explaining to some other person who is freaking out that it will get better. i'm glad to hear that it has for you. harmony-thanks for the support... tsunami--i'm new too..haha..we joined at the same time. ok..now i feel like i'm giving a speech for receiving an oscar...lol. thank you all. i really cannot express how much this has helped EVERY POST has helped. i'm not one who is easily offended and i am very open minded. if i were i would never be able to post here (personally). and thanks wasa..i can't tell you how comforting it is to hear that someone else finds it incredibly hard if not impossible to diet and exercise. i'm not sure that you yourself were unable to, but i hate that i can't. it bothers me, but that is WHY i got the band. i knew i would have to work the band, but i didn't expect to have to do ALL the work and be in the same shoes as i was before surgery....so hopefully it gets better, i'm sure it will..i'll get my restriction..lose some lbs..have some energy exercise, and WANT to eat healthy foods because i can see the results. and as far as head hunger..i'm not going to lie...posting today worked like a charm..so this just may be the beginning of many vents..i will however put a disclaimer like (i hate my band (today)).

:confused: ..that was the funniest thing that i have read all day. and you are absolutely right..it is time for me to prioritize and stop focusing and what is going on and instead focus on what i can do about. i still haven't talked to my brother about it...and honestly he has 4 times as many problems as i have right now...utilities are being shut off, baby on the way, and a $7/hour job that is an hour away. i mean..don't get me wrong..he did kind of dig his hole, but he is struggling now as it is. (i still do not understand why he couldn't tell me, but my mom...you know the type..defender...says that she thinks he has really just been too consumed with everything that is going on with the baby, etc....true...very true. _____________________________________________ this morning was rock bottom for me. i don't know maybe it is a woman thing, but that seems stereotypical..i'm sitting in my office whiping tears from the corners of my eyes because i just felt awful...i just felt utterly and completely out of control. add to the my guilt of feeling sorry for myself, and knowing that i need to suck it up and get over, and i was a nut case. however...today i did not seek food for comfort....instead i came on the forum and i posted...honestly. that was my distraction..from food..and it worked. not only did i not even take not one sip with any food today (i've been sipping), but i ate 1/4 of what i ate yesterday. and why was i able to do this, do i think?? (rhetorical..i know)..i was able to come on here and express how i feel and i received numerous private messages and responses that said..hey it gets better..you aren't the only one..or give advice that is from an outside perspective. everyone has their problems...everyone...for me today..i needed to express mine and get it off my chest.. i'm sorry that some people think i am giving the band "a bad rep", but this is hard. and wasa mentioned that dieting and exercising is hard..it is. i HAVE to do it, but i can't seem to stick to anything. i see these expectations in the eyes of others, and i feel this tremendous pressure that i am not losing..and i was just bizerk. and my financial troubles are nothing special..everyone has them. we are stressed, but we have food on the table, presents under the tree, and enough to give to some local charities. however, in the heat of a stress meltdown, it is hard to think rationally...so i chose to come on here and vent. and it worked.... so cheers to me..the band hater...by next month maybe he will become my friend again....but this morning..i hated him. i will not ..absolutely not apologize for saying that or try to make amends. my band was the tip of the iceberg and the only thing that i felt i should be able to control, and i can't. so..i hated it. now we are in the process of making up. i'm still healing though...haha.

i just wanted to say one more thing. --i did research..and i also made sure that i can afford the band, and i can..but some other things have come up that make the finances stressful, and the band is a new big payment that i'm not reaping results from i also wanted to say one more thing. i'm sorry that the thread title is misleading, but one should not assume anything until they read it all......and i think the band is glorified too much and people need to know what to expect. this emotional roller coaster has as much to do with the band as anything else. i was thrown into food rehab and i haven't fully recuperated so i'm having trouble dealing with other problems. it's great that you guys had such a wonderful experience, but not all of us do. it's the fact. anyone researching should know that. i did research..i did know that, but knowing it and feeling it are two totally different things. when i did the research i hoped that i would never feel the things that people say they feel..well guess what..i am feeling them. and newbies (as i am) shoudl know the truth. this whole glorified, omg, never say anything bad about the band, is shit. this forum is for the good, the bad, and the ugly. excuse my cliche. right now, i'm in the ugly. hopefully one day i will be in the good, but i should have every right to post during whatever stage i am in..just as you have the right to respond. i'm being honest..i can only hope everyone else will be. this is the worse thing i have ever been through and i think that people should know what to expect. so if i am wrong for putting the truth out there.....then this whole thread is wrong.

kacee-thank you for you opinion... but as i said, i know that i am in a better situation than most..and praise to you if you are always able to keep yourself in the positive light and not fall down into the pits of life. i'm sorry that you feel the way that you do, but it is posts like yours that make those of us who are struggling stay quite. i said i would rip my band out..but that was due to frustration, and it was a metaphor. if i really was that concerned i would have it removed. i know that this will pass, and i needed the encouragement of others on here that have been through what i have. i'm sorry that you feel the way that you, and i appreciate your response, but sometimes, i feel like if you don't have something nice -ish to say to someone who is already down...then don't say it.

ok..you went there...haha..so i'm going there...lol. i know it is gross, but i have had diarhea and then have a bowel obstruction in the same hour. my doctor says that a lot of times if you have loose stool that means you actually have a blockage or compaction. i don't get it either..but that has been the case for me..and when i had a complete blockage last week...i was going every day....wth?

thank you all for your replies. sometimes, when you are in the middle of all of the stress the cortisone levels in your body are just so high, that i don't think you think clearly...does that make sense? i was so stressed yesterday and this morning, and i was thinking all these crazy ideas, and my body was hurting and it was in "fight or flight mode"..haha...then i posted on here...had a heart to heart with a co-worker, and at lunch i went and purchased a card for dh and a package of lifesaver's (cuz he's my lifesaver haha) and took them to his work and put them on his mirror (hope he gets it, i realized he took his key off of my ring because he lost his when i got there). i also called a friend at lunch just to tell her that i miss her and i love her. and..biggy here..i called my doctor's office and i was in tears on the phone...needing this fill you know.. well, she talked to me for about 7 minutes on the foods that i was eating, and was trying to think of denser stuff. then we talked a bit longer and i said "are you trying to tell me to stop beating myself up and relax"..and she said "yeah, basically. once the weight starts coming off, you won't be able to stop it. be patient, and don't be so hard on yourself, dieting is hard for all of us, that is why we need the band, and your "diet" will not work until you have restriction."...so i felt better. and i read all of your caring and considerate posts, and i feel better.

yes, i have. i have had a lot of red in my stool (i know tmi), and a lot of cramping, and a lot of fresh blood during movements. i have also been extremely lightheaded..but i'm thinking this will pass and has to do with the previous obstruction. i've heard that if you have backed up bowels it slows down weight loss. it is healing, but it is taking time, so hopefully you are right (and for now i need to cut out the cheese..lol) you have no idea how much this support means to me. i honestly feel like i just left yoga. sometimes it just takes getting it out...and seeing other's be honest with you and hearing that it will pass. the money issues will be fixed, it's just going to take us time to recuperate, and some serious budget analyzing.

thank you..i had already calmed down much this morning, and was thinking of ways to help with things tonight. i know he was surprised of my sleeping on the couch. i'm not one to do that. in hindsight i think that the migraine i was having was causing me to be sort of overreactive. i am pain free right now (i wasn't when i posted this), and i am already feeling much better. you are absolutely right, when we are add odds..it seems like the whole world is falling down. we have to learn to talk to each other about what is really stressing us...money, etc., instead of fussing about other things. sometimes it takes us a minute to have a heart to heart (and honestly this is the first time we have ever been this financially tight, so i'm sure it is a learning process). thank you very much.

as far as my fill..unfortunately they have already been paid. they told me i had an apl 10cc. i have told them 4 times that is incorrect and ask which i had an aps, or a 14 cc. no response. either way, i have 6.5 cc's from my first fill. also, as for my house and car. my car will be paid in 2 months...i never buy new and only went for a $200/month payment. our other car is paid for. and for our house...i would have paid way more than $600/month in rent. so it made sense. we went for a sensible house, and not the top of the line. i have an older home that is just the right size for us, no reason to be flashy. we do not try to live outside of our means. we rarely finance things and make decisions based on what we need, not what we want (most of the time )

thank you. i should have explained better about the migraine medicine. i have meds, and a neuro who is ready and willing to dope me up. but they haven't been working. ALTHOUGH I AM HAPPY TO REPORT THAT MY MAXALT WORKED THIS MORNING....YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS. so, i have nose sprays, and meltables, and i chop up pills, but lately..nothing is working. i shouldn't have co-signed for my brother. but when i did it, i had money in the bank to cover the balance, and he was supposed to pay it off with an inheritance that he received 3 months later. well, now i have no money..and he didn't pay it off. luckily this was caught before it was reported, and the payment is being made. i can promise that i will not co-sign for anyone again. you know..he was 18, and no one could afford to buy him a car (did that once, it went into the river--emergency brake went out), and he lives in a rural area, so it's hard to work without a car. but..lesson learned..and believe me..i will be checking now every month. also, i just wanted to say that i am trying to get a fill. desperately. i call every day. but the simple fact is, they don't really care. i missed my fill appointment because i was sick, and i have one scheduled for jan 2, so i'm not a priority. unfills seem to be taking up all of their time (people are getting sick). and i am not keeping the junk food at home..thank god...or i would really be in trouble. i mean the pizza..yeah that was at home. but i work in an office and it is the holidays and we contract work out to appraisers and title companies, and they are giving us all kinds of goodies. i do think the financial stress will settle down. it just takes time, but for now, i just really needed to get all of that out there....instead of carrying it.

thank you for responding..to answer some of your questions: 1. i suffer from terrible migraines, and i have a child, and dh works about 60 hours a week, so i'm not sure if a second job would be a good idea. i have thought about opening a flea market booth, or selling avon, or home interior, or mary kay again. i need to wait a little bit until afterward. as dh says, "you do not need to add to your workload until you can handle the one that you have"...i miss regularly at my 40 hour job due to illness....i am getting better though..and my 40 hour job pays about $33k a year, so in arkansas, i'm tuff to beat that salary. 2. as for my brother. he is adhd, anti-social disorder, and 19. i should've known better, but i love him and i empathize with him, so when he didn't have the cash on hand, and he needed a car, and my parents couldn't help..i co-signed. i am not making excuses for him, but i totally understand him missing his payment. he just got a job making $7/hour 45 miles from his home, his fiancee is pregnant, and all of their utilities are being cutt off because they don't have the money. he hasn't had a job in a long time now though, so it was coming. i'm more upset by the fact that he didn't tell me. it always hurts me when i see some parts of his character shine through. he has always been one to run instead of facing the consequences. the payment has been made today though, my mom paid it. i haven't had a chance to get a hold of my brother yet. i'm going to explain to him AGAIN how important it is that he makes his payments, because he is affecting my life when he doesn't. 3. my fills are paid for the next year and a half. doesn't do much good though if it takes months to get in...lol. thank you for your suggestion though, i really appreciate it. thank you. i really appreciate your support. i need it. i know that i will get through this, and i feel like such a whiner. haha..but i feel better already.