Madam Reverie

Buckle down for 3 weeks, ladies. It gets MUCH better when you hit day 7, day 11... But when you hit the mushies - it's awesome! Hang in there

Don't be scared. Truly. We were all scared (all mouth and no trousers, most of us), but I doubt you'd find many that regret it after the fact. It is but a mere little mountain climb to reach the Protein enriched nirvana on the other side.

I can't have this stuff requested of me! My guttural genius presents itself in fits of inspiration.....

I'm clearly having a super 'mature' evening this evening...

But the important thing here, is do you really give a fiddlers fart?! You're tiny and she's twisted and bitter and... has a much larger bum than you now. Lalalalalalalala... You win, you win, you win! Yay!

Good choice. Clearly its because us Sleevers are the coolest of the bunch. Fact. <throws the hand grenade and awaits the holier than thou collateral whinging and faux protestations of cross-surgery love and appreciation> Muahaha

I went to a ceremony in a new dress two days ago. I had my hair done (badly, which wasn't helped by the rain) and despite feeling awful inside, everyone said I looked 'beautiful'. I was told by my much younger peers 'You win best dress and best cleavage of the day' I saw the photos today. I was in tears. I looked bloody awful and couldn't reconcile the changes in my body weight, with the look of my body and the look of my face. I looked awful and I knew it. Should have been elated I'm now in a size 16 (US 12/14). What I saw looking back at me in the photos was a worn, puffy-eyed and bloated-stomached mess. I spent the youth of my life being grossly overweight and I feel like I've missed my 'best' days. How's that for some serious dysmorphia? I share your pain, Lady x

Officially envious of your beach, Laura!

Hehe. TMI!

I just asked my man about the 'issue'... His answer? 'I don't care whether you bathe in it, snort it, eat it, smear it, throw it around or swallow it. I just LOVE the fact that you do it!!! - Do you know how many women refuse to do it? And you are the only woman who has ever made me.. <you know> AND you are AWESOME at it! So, you do what you like with it - I don't care!!!' Appears to be a day of compliments directed at me today. Yipppppeeeee

The mother arrived. Looking quite old and very fragile. Statements in order of delivery: 'My God, you look beautiful'. "You keep a very nice house, Revs.' 'Whatever you're doing, you're doing really well. See, you don't need to think about surgery after all. <cue shame> If you can manage your food intake like you are, then you're doing it. You look stunning.' I love my Mum. I told her that I ate little and often and not to get on at me for eating little. I cooked and ate a roast chicken with all the trimmings this evening. They had normal portions. I had a smaller portion with all the veg, gravy, etc. She didn't say a word and 'cause there was gravy involved, I didn't feel 'stuck'. I did, however, feel like I needed a wee nap afterwards... 30 minutes later though, i was all good in the hood. Maybe a meal out won't be insurmountable after all. Thanks for the advice, folks x

That's why I 'pre-fed' the line about suffering GERD. This was further corroborated when I went to Ireland recently and said to my Uncle (who speaks to my mother every day without fail) 'Oh, look, you're on the same tablets as me for GERD- omeprazole'.. THAT would have gone back that evening. My cover story is in place

I have no idea... Neither confirm or deny anything, I guess.... First rule of thumb for any defendant! I think this thread is amusing though. I actually asked for food recommendations and got excellent lessons in avoidance tactics. Hehe, I concede the inter-family shennanigans are more interesting.. I was just worried about what I can swallow in quantity to make myself 'appear' 'normal' (for a change)

Mmmm pomegranate juice.. my absolute favourite....

Well, she knows I've been dieting.. She knows I've lost weight. I just don't want her thinking there's something seriously wrong. And yes, your longing is my greatest fear. That's why I wanted to protect her. Feel for you, honey x

I was thinking of saying I'm on the Atkins diet. No carbs, more meat. Mix it with the GERD and I have to do 6 small meals a day to avoid keeling over... Careful there, that could stir many things in many people! The man is already my human dustbin, bless him. He has agreed to be complicit in the food disposal exercise The man will NOT be getting my wine. Ever I may go for the nervous exhaustion thing.. That normally kicks the intestines into overdrive, doesn't it? <poop poop!>

Sadly, this isn't going to happen. I'm wearing a fairly posh frock for the day. And it fits. I could put it down to nervous exhaustion, I guess. Certainly won't be wrecking everyones evening with the 'woe is me' act. Particularly in a posh restaurant. Just got to find something easily eaten and sleeve/dinner party friendly! Wine? I am ALL good with the wine... and vodka.. and cider... and Guinness

I do love my mum. She's a right, royal pain in the bum, but I do love her. After all, where d'ya think I got all my sparkling 'attributes' from?! Muahahaha..... And your Mum in on her fifth husband?! Good for her! She must like wedding cake.... and dresses. As for the creativity.. I was also thinking of deploying the 'GERD' thing. I, being the wily coyote I am, had already primed her of this 'diagnosis', ooh, about 1.5 months ago..... :ph34r:

Again, nice in sentiment and I'm glad it worked for you - but absolutely not going to happen in practice. My Mum is old and has health conditions that preclude me from ever telling her. Her health and wellbeing are more important than my relieving myself of this little secret. It wouldn't matter how old she is - by my, her baby, not seeking her counsel prior to taking the decision to get carved up on the slab? Her blood pressure would go through the roof. This, is NOT an option.

To be fair, RJ, i do take sips of Water during my meals - so it wouldn't be that noticeable. Can't do food without it. Me no likey 'dry' eating. I'll have to order a glass of wine though - as I have ALWAYS had wine with dinner when out. The moment I didn't drink, would be the moment that she'd eye me suspiciously. She'd probably assume I were pregnant! Arrrgh! The 'exhaustion' argument is a good one, as we will have had a very long and excitable day. Combine exhaustion with 'isn't the Soup awful' and I might be onto a winner...

Thank you for the best wishes. Truly. However, if I told her I'd gone through with it? Without taking her counsel? The morphine/anesthesia taking me from this mortal coil during surgery would have been preferable to what she would unleash!!

Mais Oui, Laura! However, those meals denote a number of courses, require a fair amount of time (my mum is old and doesn't like to fanny around)... and my man would be like 'erm, where's my dinner at?'

That's canny, Cathy! I like it!

Okay, guys. I need your learned assistance. My Mother is visiting.. (ergo the Jaws music - or, if you prefer - a bit of Carl Orf) She doesn't know I've had surgery. No one knows, apart from my Fiance. (My choice, and with very good reasons for keeping it from her) Anyhooo... There will be a requirement to attend a very nice restaurant at some point, as we have something to Celebrate. I will not be able to get out of this. I will, however, be able to select the restaurant. Since being 'done', I have eaten out at mid-level eateries. However, I have been in the presence of fellow sleevers/RNY-ers or my Fiance. Consequently and in those circumstances, I can 'pick' at will and eat as little as I like without anyone turning a hair. My Mother, is different. She is a hawk-eye. She will undoubtedly notice in the first instance that I've shed a load of weight. This will undoubtedly result in her analysing everything I eat and drink - to make sure that I haven't got some secret disease or am pregnant or something. She's an ex-nurse, incredibly bright and has 'street-smarts' - so I'm not going to be able to BS my way through this one very easily. I have tried a variety of foods and some I can eat more of than others. Clearly, dense Protein is hefty and fills you up quickly. However, I need to find a meal that is light and in being so, allows me to fanny around with it over a period of time and look like I've eaten a 'decent' sized meal accordingly. I can't order a starter and be done with it - it has to be a main meal. I would also look odd to order a salad - given that it is approaching zero degrees here. I don't like a lot of fish (and she knows I'm not a fan, so to order it would appear out of character). And for reference, it would unlikely be a an asian/chinese/thai restaurant we'd go to - more French/European. Any suggestions folks? I'd be grateful for any inspiration -at all - 'cause I'm bamboozled and starting to freak out just a little bit. I can just imagine the mini 'show down' in the restaurant if she even smelt the whiff of deception.... :ph34r:

TOTALLY!