Valentina

Congrats on your joyful and successful journey so far. From time to time our bodies need a breather to catch up with what our brains are telling them to do. After so many years of eating "x" amount of calories everyday, and now all of a sudden----WHOA!! Your body is just can't keep up with the change that your brain is swirling at it. Keep with your regimen. Be patient. Your "sand is shifting". Have you noticed your clothes fitting a bit looser? Are you breathing a wee bit easier. There are many stages of WLS. You know that If you insist on being a worrier, call your bariatric team and make an appointment to brainstorm with your Nut. Perhaps some tweaking is in order. You are doing a "Maaaavelous job, Daaaaling".

Now I share my experience with anyone who asks---up front and factual. You know as well as I that a group of friends who as a group, want "information" about a "secret" that another friend is keeping from them, they will walk through a bed of hot coals to find out the "nitty gritty". Worried about FB and /or any social media? It's all "smoke and mirrors", my friend. ---all nothing but "smoke and mirrors". Don't worry yourself about somethings or somebodies who are not really real at all. Enjoy your decision, whatever it is. It is yours to make.

As our bodies change, so do our tolerances and intolerances. Allergies can come or go at any time our bodies are changing. If YOU didn't recognize your body's allergic reactions , how would ER doctors know? Unless you were lucky enough to see a doctor that you've seen before, ER doctors are professionals that you probably will only come in contact with once. Their main objective is to "stabilize and ship". They are to treat your acute symptoms and then once stabilized, transfer your care. Have you been seen by an allergist? Do you have an appointment to see one soon?? They will be able to "allergy test" you and pinpoint exactly what is causing your reactions. I am extremely allergic to anything containing SOY. Over the years I have had to be intubated in an ER several times. Not so much in recent years because I have learned to read EVERY label because the damned cursed stuff is in EVERYTHING---even tuna fish (except solid albacore). ---And soy is the base for many anesthias. Makes surgery a wee bit tricky. Anyway, I guess I'm suggesting that taking a deep breath and not be quite so quick to "blame" ER doctors for not diagnosing your allergies. Give 'em a break. Now that you know you have an allergy, the ball is in YOUR court----go have your allergy pinpointed and then listed on all of your medical records. If need be, you should carry an " EPIPEN" so you can self inject Epinephrine when you feel a reaction coming on. Feel better, friend. You know what's wrong. Now you can get a handle on it. All will be well.

I would probably do the same, BUT after I had a face to face with my surgeon. He/she needs to know how you feel, hopefully so they can delvelope a "plan of correction", and YOU need to vent your frustrations.

And when you keep losing and losing and losing? Do you tell them that you were mistaken. They weren't crabs. They were piranhas????

It would be so entertaining to give out about 14 completely preposterous stories like you are taking tums with Coronas and radishes, the Mexico Water diet that makes you poop everything out at an alarming rate, that you combined the raw and the Adkins diet and now you eat nothing but raw meat or you could always claim that you volunteered to by probed by aliens. Oh no! I actually do love eating raw meat and have dreams about alien probing...

Thank you, Friend. One day at a time. I'm sure I'll be less cranky when I heal from this skin removal surgery. This surgery is a tough one. But, I'll get there.

That has always been a tough question for me. Of course I regret with every cell in my body, John's suicide the morning of my WLS. I miss him every day. But the surgery itself? No. I can not honestly say that I regret having the surgery. I needed it to stop my weight from destroying my spine and knees. My regret is that I never could get John to understand how having the surgery would only benefit our life together. My advice? Be sure that you are strong enough to have WLS ALONE, because we never know what tomorrow will bring or who might be taken from us. I realize that my journey is different and extreme. I wish you all a joyful WLS journey. It really can be. It's taken me five years, but now my journey is also a joyful one.

Ask yourself, "Who am I having this surgery for? --for "them" or for "me"? " It's tough and it's disappointing to find out such nonsupport at this time, but you HAVE to be strong enough to have this surgery FOR YOU, and YOU ALONE. Will your "friend" come around? Who knows? Whether that person is who you consider a "friend" that you want in your life is a decision for another day. For tomorrow? GO FORWARD, my friend. FOREVER---FORWARD.

Double dirty with THREE olives--no more/no less! Then---I'm in!

So true. Does anything smell better than home made chicken Soup simmering on the stove??? Yum!

Time to "Daddy up"? Afraid of looking foolish? Ha! Believe me, my friend, looking foolish to our children ranks right up there with the ability to embarrass them at the drop of a hat. Those ships sailed long time ago. When I was raising my two daughters alone, I always found that actions speak "their" language, where as words are as effective as spitting into the wind. I remember one incident when my eldest absolutely refused to put her clean clothes into her dresser. She just lived out of her laundry basket. I had asked her again and again and again. I finally had "spoken" to her for the last time about putting her clothes away. The next day when the school bus pulled up in front of our house, there hanging in the two Locus trees in the front yard were All of her bras and panties! Ya know? I never had to ask her to put her clean clothes away again. Why am I telling you this? --just to say that she knows. You don't have to point out the elephant in the room. You're actions will save the day. How about a quiet dinner, or just meeting for a cup of tea or whatever? I'm sure she will ask you "how are you, Dad?". There's your opening, my friend. You can explain to her how your WLS decision has changed your life for the better, and how you consider having WLS a life saver, etc. You know---the truth. Then: Take her hand and say, "If there is EVER a time when YOU decide that you want to talk about having WLS, it would make me the happiest Dad in the world if you would include me in your conversations. I am here for you now, whenever and forever." "A son is a son until he takes a wife, but a daughter is a daughter for the rest of her life." I would just let her know that you are here for her---when SHE is ready. My opinion, my friend. I hope it helps you, Dear Ol' Dad.

I've always found that the easiest way to get co-workers "poking and prodding" into your personal business is to NOT answer their questions. Doing so makes finding "the nitty gritty" details a fun challenge for the "gossip mongers" who thrive in every workplace. I've just answered each question as factual and to the point and "dry" as possible. Doing so, I have found takes all of the fun out of finding out "the real truth". Having WLS was my decision. So what? I'm not ashamed of it, so why keep it a secret?(my opinion). Some one want a question answered, ask and I will give an honest and direct answer. That ends the "I know The REAL story about Valentina's sudden weight loss. She had an abortion and now has CA because God is angry with her", bullsh*t. Facts stops that nonsense every time. Facts are soo uninteresting. On this day, the above is my personal opinion.

Have you discussed your concerns, depth of anxiety, fears and depression honestly with your therapists? What are their opinions ? Do they think you should wait until you are more "comfortable"? You're right. WLS is not easy. It is a physical and emotional rollercoaster from the get-go. My suggestion? I would have a serious sit down with your entire bariatric team and "round robin" the pros and cons. Together, you should be able to answer your concerns. I wish you nothing but the best and for you to be "at peace" with whatever decision you come to. Please post and post often. I am looking forward to following your successful WLS journey.--whenever it happens. You're in my thoughts, Friend.

So, Friend, what are the deciding factors? Why would you postpone your surgery? I'll help if I can. If I can't I'm positive that there is some member who will be able to. --just need a wee bit more info, please. We're here and we're listening.

There is much research, reading, watching, discussing, listening, and then the whole list repeats and repeats and... in your near future. There will always be "road blocks" if you're looking for them. The idea is to "overcome" and/or work through the road blocks. The first thing to do is to find a bariatric team whose mindset is the same as yours. These are the folks who will be your new "closest friends" for the foreseeable future. Take one concern at a time. Research it until you are satisfied with the outcome. Then move on to the next. As far as coffee/caffeine? It was never forbidden to me. Never/ever. I worked with my surgeon and my Nut.. Together we came up with a plan that allowed me my coffee. (for every oz. of coffee I drank, I had to have an oz. of water) It worked for me and still is. Don't overwhelm yourself. One step at a time, my friend. One step at a time.

How about a frozen marshmellow???

SWEET, Dub, SWEET!!! Not one third salt, one third egg whites and one third bleach... Hey, but if it works for you, Dub, who am I to judge?. And Dub? YUCK, YUCK AND THEN------YUCK!

You know that you are going to worry. It's just the way you are. Seriously, don't hesitate to call your team if you have ANY concerns about post-op drains. I'm sure you were given "drain care" instructions. Your team will want to know what's going on that is worrying you. Only they can help you. I came home from the hospital, having had skin surgery on Aug 9th with four drains. I still have two and they are still accumulating red, yucky drainage every day. ( I will never look at raspberry vinaigrette ever the same. ) I don't know about you, my friend, but I will be hilariously happy when these last two come out! Really, give your team a call. They will be able to ease your worry if nothing else. Feel better.

I say, "That is all. Thank you".

They are soooo much prettier than the compression garment the hospital sent me home in!

I find that it is not too difficult day to day to eat post sleeve surgery---even five years out. Your "Protein first then veggies" diet becomes the "norm". Your sleeve will keep you honest about your portions. Five years out and I still have no appetite. That is not the norm, but it does happen to a few sleevers. I used to have to set my cell phone when it was time for me to eat. Once a routine is established, eating becomes easier. Also, you will find that there are probably going to be foods that you will not be able to tolerate. 17% of all sleevers experience "dumping syndrome". I do. If I eat anything too sweet, too spicy, too rich, Pasta, rice, soft bread or it I eat too fast or too much whatever I had eaten comes back up. It's part of my life now. I look upon dumping as another tool to keep me "honest". I look upon each day as a cheerful challenge. I have a goal at the end of the day where I have walked "x" amount of steps, eaten "x" grams of protein, and "x" grams of carbs. How I get to those goals is completely up to me. My diet/menu is for me to control. My weight no longer controls me. I hope I have answered your questions. If not, please to not hesitate to ask. Take care, Friends.

Thank you all for YOUR words of support and compassion. Yes, even at five years out, I still feel the "warmth" of compassion. My journey is a wee bit different that most. My SO was NOT supportive and did NOT want my to have WLS. He committed suicide while I was on the operating table. When I found out, I signed myself out of the hospital and never mentioned my sleeve again until Jan.,2016. During those years I fought against my sleeve and my body and still lost 80# plus. After years of therapy, I am back on track and have now lost over 120#. I have learned to work "with" my sleeve, to "listen" to my body and to take care of "me". I consider myself finally finishing the journey that I started five years ago, but made a wrong left turn. There are many members who can tell you all about the "good times", how to do the right things, eat the right things, how not to do this and that. Doing everything the right way--the way it is supposed to be. That is wonderful when your life is running smoothly---which I sincerely hope it does for each and every one of you. I hope what I can offer you is that there is always a way to turn back onto the right path. Your sleeve will be there---waiting to help you---to work with you. Become best friends, work together--listen to one another. I hope to be able to encourage folks that have for what ever reason have had their enthusiasm wilted--their rainbow's glow tarnished. I can only speak for myself: Grab my hand-----I will NEVER let go. I promise. PS: Anyone one of you should feel free to PM anytime. I promise not to be post op cranky for too much longer.

You gunna keep "the color"???? Wonderful! I'm one week out. I still have all of my sutures, but was able to get rid of two drains yesterday. I'm having "nerve" pain that I was not expected. The surgical pain itself is tolerable, but the "nerve" pain is unexpected and unacceptable. By the way----I will NOT be posting pix of my new and "perdy lady bits". Sorry. PS: You look "Maaaavelous, Daaaaling". There are meds specific to nerve pain. Ask your doc about Neurontin. My surgeon wrote a RX for Neurontin . All it did was make me sleepy and dizzy. But thank you ever so much for your concern. Since drain #2 was removed, my nerve pain is much less, so keep your fingers crossed, please. @goddess04: I had my pannis removed, chest muscles this and belly button that and my "lady bits" purdied up. --AND NO, I'm posting pictures! Thank you all for the support. I really needed and appreciate it.

Ahh, my friend, "you've been slimed"! You will find as you go what will trigger the "slimers". You are probably right this time--too much sugar. Other Slimers: too spicy Too rich too sweet eaten too much eaten too fast You will conjure your own "slime list" as you go. However, give your team a call. They may be able to help you with some wonderful suggestions. Welcome, friend!