gowalking

Speaking of 'back of the closet', this trip to Florida was spent mostly at a store called 'Arlene's Closet'. Not a real store...my mom (Arlene) held onto some very high quality outfits that she hasn't worn in many years as she no longer fits in them. She told me she gave away alot of stuff over the years but held onto a few choice items. I fit into all of them. In fact, some are a little big. She gave me an outfit that I can wear for any formal occasion that she wore for my neice's Bat Mitzvah. I remember it and I know she spent like $500 for it. She also gave me a beautiful pair of black slacks and a fancy matching top that she used to wear open like a jacket but I can easily close. I'm wearing it to my company Christmas Party next Saturday. She also gave me two silk blouses. I've never worn real silk before. And she gave me a couple of sweaters that I'm sure cost an arm and a leg as well. They are the first 'fitted' sweaters I've worn in years. You know....short and clingy instead of big and bulky. I've been giving her stuff for months that's too big for me and now she's giving me stuff that's too small for her. The difference is that I'm giving her 'throwaway' type of items because I didn't want to spend alot, and in return, I'm getting the better stuff...including the two full length minks and the mink jacket.

I started seeing a therapist nearly a year post-op. My issue at that time was not learning how to manage my behavior but body image issues. I did not recognize myself when I looked in the mirror. I had lost around 100 lbs. but I did not see a thinner person...I saw an old woman looking back at me. My hair was falling out, my skin was wrinkled, and I looked like my grandmother. I've gotten past the 'critical' issues of learning I need to give up some of my feelings of needing to be in control and I'm starting to get more comfortable with the much smaller sized person I've become but I'm now working with the therapist to tackle some of the deep issues surrounding my need to turn to food when I have emotional reactions to situations. Whether you see a therapist, or go with a support group...or do both if you need to, the point is that you should do whatever you need to make yourself better be it weight loss surgery and/or followup support in whatever way you require it. I agree with others in that those of us who are battling our weight have issues that manifest in overeating behaviors. Some abuse alcohol, others abuse drugs. We abuse food. I understand that I need to go deep to change my behaviors and need the help of a professional. Others do not or they need different type(s) of support. Good luck with whatever you choose...even if your choice is to do nothing beyond surgery.

I have no personal experience being a single gal, but I understand that this is a very common situation. Plus, you have a prior history of this behavior and it likely is something he fears will happen again. I would suggest you reassure him as much as possible that he has nothing to worry about. It might be worth seeing a professional as well s he can voice his fears and you can voice your annoyance in a 'neutral' place. Good luck. I do hope you can resolve this and move forward as a couple.

Thanks for the good wishes everyone. I'm so happy to know that I can walk him in the carriage, carry him up and down the stairs, sit on the floor with him...and a host of other things I couldn't do two years ago.

Thanks Arlene.

Found out earlier this evening that a grandson is on the way. I am truly blessed to be able to say this little guy will have a healthy and mobile grandma to love and help take care of him.

I was also going to suggest you check the menu first...and if all else fails, have soup and you can tell them any kind of little lie. Say you're not that hungry, or you are having a procedure and need to just be on liquids...something like that. I have found in the almost two years that I've been banded, most folks are only interested in what is happening with them and their food...not what's happening with you and your food. Don't worry so much...most people don't notice anything beyond their own meal.

Happy Birthday Debbie!!

Try fish instead of steak or even chicken. I never have a problem with it and it's one of the 'good' foods.

Good luck and welcome to the other side!

Just a follow up note. Got on the scale this morning and my weight is right where it's been. If I gained anything over Thanksgiving, it's already gone. So just goes to show....we can indulge without going overboard. Sorta like people without food issues...lol.

My surgeon is Dr. Ren at the same practice you are with. There are nutritionists available. Have you spoken to them? There is support to help you. Talk to Dr. Schwack about your addiction. You say that the sugary drinks are doing you in so you need to work with the professionals to learn how to stop. We also have a NYC support group that meets once a month or so. Feel free to PM me if you want to be added to the mailing list.

So yesterday was all about spoonfuls for me. I wanted stuffing....I wanted sweet potato, I wanted the greenbean casserole, I wanted gravy. I took my roughly 3 oz. turkey with a spoonful of gravy, and took a spoonful of everything else. Was it more than I usually eat? Yes. Did I stuff myself like the turkey? No. I made several conscious decisions during the meal. I had alcohol...more than usual but I wanted it. Won't repeat that tonight so it was simply a one off. Had dessert and not of the 100 calorie or sugar-free type. Again...a one off. Didn't even bother to get on the scale this morning. If I gained a bit, so what? Back to eating as usual today. Did not go nuts yesterday...all is well. Hoping this is my new normal for the rest of my life.

Absolutely not. All I feel is the port, which is very pronounced as I have very little body fat left. When it was first installed, only I could feel it buried under so much fat. Now, if you know to look, you can see it sticking out of my tummy. I'm both somewhat embarrased and very proud of that bump.

Same here! Yes, I'm so thankful that I can move again but I'm also so thankful and grateful to you wonderful people here on this site. I could not have done this without your support and friendship. Have a great holiday...don't stress it..enjoy the day, your company, and the food. Love to you all, Liz

It's not about the food. It never was on the holidays. I was a closet eater...I ate 'normal' at family functions because I knew everyone was watching me. (they weren't but that's how I felt because I was so large) So I never overate at the get together...no...I ate to excess when I got home. So now, I eat my regular amount of food and no eating anything else after. It let's me focus on enjoying the family and that's good enough for me.

That was my surgery date as well. I'll be two years out on the 14th. Wishing you as much success as I've had.

Congratulations. When is your surgery? I'm in NYC by the way.

OMG! Nearly peed my pants reading that.

Everything pink dahlia said...

I used to look like I just got out of a shower, I'd sweat so badly just moving around...not like I was exercising or anything like that. Now I hardly sweat at all but...be careful what you wish for. Sweetie, I'm always cold...even in air conditioning. I'm bringing a sweater with me to Florida because I get cold in the house, or a store/restaurant. I feel like I'm channeling my Nana (may she rest in peace) sometimes..lol.

I live in a 17 story apartment building built in the early 1960's. I can't set the heat myself...no thermostat. So I'm at the mercy of the boiler in the basement. I've been in this apartment for almost ten years and usually have to keep a window partially open in the winter along with sometimes running the ceiling fan because I was plenty warm even in the coldest months. In fact, I've needed my heavy comforter just a handful of times over the years. So last winter, I give in to the cold and pull out the comforter and close the window and chalk it up to 100 lbs. less of me and the polar vortex the weathermen screamed about. Fast forward to this year and the blast of cold air we've been dealing with this week and me shivering unless I'm wearing layers. And that's in the apartment...not walking around outside. I'm wearing flannel to bed and two quilts (just not ready to pull out the comforter yet). I keep checking the radiators to see if the heat is coming up and it is. Since last winter, I've dropped another 45 or so pounds and didn't think that would have made such a difference but I guess it does because I went from a sweat monster a couple of years ago to someone who is often chilled to the bone these days. Even the fella complained about my cold hands and feet the other day. Was a good opening for me to tell him to warm me up, but that's another story...lol. Amazing how many things are affected by our size that we just don't realize. Have a great weekend everyone!

Happy Birthday my dear friend. I hope the weather is better down your way and Keith takes you on a wonderful birthday ride this weekend. Love the picture by the way. Sending you best wishes and much love today. ReadySet....so glad to hear about your brother's decision. I know how relieved you are that he's decided to tackle this problem. I know you will be amazing support for him. Happy Friday everyone. I just printed out my boarding pass for Florida and am currently doing a happy dance at my desk. I look great in the mink coat but am just as glad to not have to wear it for the next ten days.

I know that for me, socialization is a big part of working out. I joined the Y and take Water exercise classes. When I am feeling like I don't want to change into my suit and get wet, I think about how nice it is to sit and chat with the ladies in the sauna after our class is over. That's my 'treat' for doing the hour of exercises first. Find what works for you to help you to motivate. It's not easy but we are here to help you and I am glad you reached out.

I don't think I'll ever get tired of reading posts like this. So very happy for you Pat!