CowgirlJane

At one point I was so disappointed that my breasts looked, but especially FELT so unnatural. My boyfriend said "oh no, they feel natural. You just forgot how young breasts feel but I HAVEN'T!" That was perfect and with the perspective of time I n ow know he was right, they turned out awesome. Thing is, once the swelling goes down and your brain adjusts,I think you will have a more realistic view of yourself. You must have looked at hundreds of before and after photos, are your results that far off?

I genuinely want everyone to find good health and get weight under control. I had a lapband for 10 years - not a good experience and I suffered alot and was still obese. It was a terrible life altering experience. I have been sleeved 3 years, good experience but it still impacts my life. I lost 100 percent of my excess weight with the sleeve and could not have done it without...so I understand the feeling of wanting something to help get out of this cycle of gaining weight. What I didn't understand is that diets don't work as they are a temporary alteration in habits and permanent change is needed. Even post sleeve, I have to work at maintenance. I chat with others that are even more years out than I am and the struggle with regain, acid reflux is a real issue across the board. Statistically, most people have some regain a few years down the road. What I am trying to express is the serious nature of getting this surgery and to be sure it's really worth it. I am really pleased the OP is considering options. Around here we have these lifestyle programs that go like two years where you get coaching on how to live a healthy lifestyle. They aren't cheap but you learn the things you'd better learn post sleeve or you will regain anyway....and you leave with your anatomy intact. No risk of leaks, reflux, ulcers etc. Good wishes for much success!

Thank you for sharing this. I did NOT experience this emotion but i have been... i will say it... appalled... at the many posts over time that clearly express downright hatred and disrespect toward obese people. I don't notice what other people eat, i don't wonder who is fatter versus thinner than me, I don't judge obese people as failures. I did not understand where that venom came from, but your insight gives me another perspective to think about. As I reflect, i am wondering if obese people have become invisible to me which is just antother way of marginalizing people because I was just trying to remember last time I encountered a very large person and I can't think of it. Maybe that is even worse, i don't know.

LL - you funny... I skulked out of there like a criminal so lucky to have departed with the gear i arrived with..haha My favorite restaurant has a "one holer" restroom for each gender. I have used the mens room before when the ladies had a line - but that is a lot different then being in a HUGE restroom with maybe 20-30 stalls (unoccupied when I arrived I might add)

Just a caution to the original poster, some foods are much denser than others. 4 ounces of steak is still a big portion for me 3 years out. Just go slow, eat until no longer hungry and don't push it. Eating "small" consistently is one of the secrets to long term success.

Kim, i didn't know this when i was obese because i buried my feelings - oddly not so much in the food itself, but the obesity - but I thrive on touch. My dogs provide affection. Especially my little dog gives me that feeling of someone who pets me whilst I pet her. I know that probably sounds wacko, but it soothes us both to just be in contact. I know you have just had a terrible loss and when my previous Papillion Ziva died in April 2012 i didn't want another lover lapdog EVER. My partner (now my ex) insisted we at least meet the pup nobody else wanted - that was offered to me In June 2012 and it was the best decision EVER to take that wild child home! Fast forward to 2015 - part of what I find so wonderful about Scott is he "gets" my attachment to my 7 pounder like he has to his hunting dog. They are so bonded; she is is girl just like Suzy is my love. I know you aren't ready for a new pupster, but be open to it in the future. dogs can fill a hole in the heart and soul... okey dokey.. speaking of scott. tomorrow is our one month anniversary. We met tonight after what seems like a long absence, because his daughter is visiting in town and we decided we are not ready to introduce her yet - but tonight she was at grammys house so we spent some time together. I loved that he asked the "kids" that work for him what you should do for a one month anniversary (wow, he noticed!) and the consensus was take me to a nice dinner. We had an amazing wine tasting and then sushi meal. And lots of romance. Here is the thing.. and I guess I needed to go through all the dating to get this.... He isn't tall, he isn't super hot (like Steven) but I am so drawn to him. His eyes are beautiful, he is beautiful to me - his heart is so into me, and he treats me like a princess. He thinks I am the hottest girl on the planet. My friends adore him (hmm... i wondered if they like him better...haha) They see he is a good man. Keep fingers crossed that we make it another month.

i did not read the whole thread... but you have got to be freaking kidding me! This is not an insult to the original poster, but bariatric surgery is for those of us suffering from the disease of obesity. Surgery helps us CONTROL and manage our symptoms (ie we lose weight) but we are always people with the disease of obesity. Once you have been morbidly obese, your body is changed permanently. This is no joke, it is serious business. It is relatively safe, but people can DIE. People can have complications that ruin their lives for months, if not YEARS. For someone like me, it was worth taking the risk and it paid off big time. I lost like... 160 pounds, not 20-30 - no complications, but it is still hard at times. i am so thrilled, I would do it 100 times over, my life is so much better now but OMG - I was DYING of obesity not just a bit chubby. Seriously, no disrespect intended, but this is the WRONG PATH for someone who is just a little overweight.

@@kelbug1990 I thank you so much for posting this. I hope that anyone who uses the search function for the "molina" finds your encouraging story. I have been so scared that the sleeve is just another of those experiments, but so far so good! (I was a BioEnterics lapband to sleeve revision and have done just awesome) i am happy for you that you have found success and RELIEF. I used to be scared of the bypass, but now i see it way differently. There is a reason it is considered the gold standard.

We have had a terrible terrible ski season in the Pacific Northwest. no snow.... seriously, even in the mountains. In January we had a pittance at Stevens pass so I got all excited and headed up after a half day of work to an afternoon of skiing. My son is an advanced snowboarder, but i am still skiing the bunny slopes so we parted ways. I have to pick up rental gear whilst he owns (thanks Mom) tuned gear just right for him. so, I am in a huge hurry to make it to my 1 o clock lesson, and the place was pretty dead on a Thursday afternoon on a crappy snow season day so I decide to multitask, dash into the restroom whilst putting on my snow pants etc. I leaned the skis outside the stall, but was gearing up inside. I am in there a few minutes when I get this odd feeling. Something is wrong. I look around - everything LOOKS normal. Then I realize what is missing - women's restrooms have sounds... chatty sounds. The sounds of two ladies talking, or a mom with her kids.. you hear voices. always... even on dead midweek day... somebody must walk in. I hear silence. another minute passes as I am gearing up and I start thinking.. I think I need to get out of here. I take a deep breath, open the door.. and yup.. two guys are at the sink washing up. Out of the corner of my eye I see the urinals with a dude standing there with his back to me, thank goodness - how did I miss this obvious clue - I am in the FREAKING MENS ROOM! It's not like I can make a quick exit.. oh no, I gotta gather up skis, poles, my gear bag, etc etc. One of MANY nice things I can say about dudes, they don't freak out about this kind of stuff. They both had the decency to pretend I wasn't there whilst I tried to look as boylike as possible in my form fitting cold weather under armours... crap... they might have seen definately saw my profile in the mirror! So, during my lesson I tell this story to a young woman as we ride the ski lift up and she says... I almost walked in there too.. at the last minute I saw the sign! sheesh... see how easy it is to accidently conduct business in the "wrong room"!?!

I browsed a couple of the dueling threads and my take on all of this is that there is quite a bit of truth on "both sides". I remember a time when I was very emotionally vulnerable over the topic of weight, food and weight loss surgery. I had failed miserably with the band and it was humiliating. I lurked here for months and then posted quite selectively - it is very true that sharing certain things leave you vulnerable to perceived or real attack. I remember very small comments would sting a bit. It was over time that my "emotional self pain" decreased and those same remarks were not experienced that way. However, as my mother used to say "It takes 2 to Tango" On this forum, it usually takes 3-6 to really throw down good..haha... but drama is pretty easy to avoid. Just don't engage.

I had alot of weight to lose so I had to keep the momentum strong for a long time. when i was eating 2 Quest bars a day, my weight losses slowed way down. I am not sure why - the extra carbs? The tastes good triggers me to eat just a little more other times? The processed ingredients? I don't know. I only had 2 a day, but it felt like they had just a little too much "Draw" for me. I felt like I wanted them like a candy bar substitute. I do have bars in maintenance but i intentionally choose ones I don't care for as much - I really only eat them if i am very hungry and need something fast. I get the premier Protein ones from costco and they are high protein and don't taste that great. The box lasts a long time...

I think the main reason the ladies and mens room are often read by other gender is because the post shows up on side bar under recent posts and trending topics. I can NOT tell the forum until I click on the post. If ladies and mens rooms topics were removed from that sidebar I would never"accidentally" read or reply to a post in mens forum as I would not seek it out.

I would echo others...that sounds pretty normal to me. One thing I try to do is be very active in addition to exercise.

I went a few times...once preop and once post. Otherwise all online. I try to pay it forward here!

So.. Atlanta has been amazing. If I EVER relocate (not likely) - it will be to here. The food is epic, my work colleagues here are so genuine and welcoming and while the weather was crappy when I arrived... tonight I did an 1 hour and 15 minute walk and saw so many people out after dark, sitting in outdoor patios, etc... love southern nights! I am here one more day, then take a late flight home. I will be dead on Thursday, but worth it! Hard to believe... but Friday is my one month anniversary with Scott. He still calls me everyday. I still feel like I have known him for years, not weeks. My friends adore him - ha - whats there not to like? If I were not such a self confident woman I would worry they like him better than they like me .. Actually, I LOVE that. I trust my peeps instincts as they are not subject to "sheryl's way of rationalizing things". He keeps telling me there is plenty to not like - I just haven't found it yet. Keeping fingers crossed. This week has been one more reminder.. I eat every meal with colleagues. I eat less than other women and I am eating way more than MY normal. I expect to go home with a gain. I don't feel resentment, I feel grateful for the reminder that I can't eat like normal people and maintain my figure. Some of my pals that I haven't seen in about 18 months (last time I was down here) remind me I look so amazing. It is like that boost you get when you first got to goal. i think i needed that. How are all of you doing - I don't mean weight - I mean how are you FEELING? I feel damn good and thank my lucky stars for it!

@@LipstickLady how did you like the Korean bbq?

I am a PSSC patient and think they are awesome!

I never did email notifications. I go to "content I follow" and can see all posts I have replied to and who/when latest update. I am in rainy cold Atlanta. Weird weather that Seattle is nicer..Haha! I am beside myself with glee these days. Things are just good!

Kim, I am so sorry

@@Hoven that's exactly right. My point is most people prefer the taste of a milkshake to a Protein drink..does not make us picky eaters. I know it can take some adjusting but sometimes people state they don't or won't comply because they are picky eaters...and I find that aggravating because sometimes you just have to do what's necessary for your health. I too am a selective eater since my sleeve 3 years ago...I want high quality foods prepared well - that is not what I am ranting about. Some people DO have food limits but Blerd that is not what I am talking about either. Also I have never seen you use it as an excuse. Haven't you all seen the question from a self proclaimed picky eater that they need food suggestions because they don't really like (fill in the blank with list of healthy foods). Requests on how to prepare or otherwise work them in, I embrace...that is someone seeking a solution not excuses.

this is not directed at anyone in particular and in fact was inspired by multiple posts over nearly 4 years... I find it freaking annoying that people post that they cannot comply with XX because they are "picky eaters". okay, lets get real. How did you possibly get morbidly obese (ie 100# or more overweight) being a delicate eater? Okay, let's imagine that happened. Now, you are in the battle for your freaking life, and you will let something like "that didn't taste good" interfere with your success? Really? I so understand how hard it is.. but really????? Do you think I don't dream of snickers bars and have a bit of Protein drink in my coffee instead? I have read about how people hate to choose shrimp and chicken over "yummy food" when going out... I get that it is venting, but honestly, what did you expect? (besides, shrimp skewers are delish!) I actually want a serious answer to that question. Do some imagine that by the sheer act of stomach reduction that lasting weight loss was guaranteed without changing your eating patterns? ok,, vent over - carry on!

Well, I am deciding to not complain because i am still under goal! It is just hard when you used to be skinnier! Except for one pair of jeans, all my clothes fit, but they looked better a few pounds lighter. I am so happy right now it doesn't matter too much, but like Denise i notice stuff that should fit loose don't because I am not working out. Good news is the physical therapy is working it's magic again and as soon as I am not working a zillion hours i can go back to kickboxing..woohoo! I am 3 years and 3 months. I will turn 51 in June. Maintenance is getting harder. I am really spending energy on thinking positive about all that. I don't think i express often enough the plain ole joy I feel at the life i live now. tonight I went dancing and some drunk asshole I danced with actually yelled out to one of the tables "Hey Dave, Jim - LOOK" and pointed at me as though I were a prize fish he'd reeled in. While it was a jerk thing to do , it did remind me that maybe I am OK at 155ish. (Scott is busy with his little girl for awhile and so I decided to go visit my old dancing friends that I haven't seen in awhile). Thank goodness my old regular dance partner showed up and we both noticed I am seriously rusty! Crap.

Don't do it behind his back. That is toxic.

I am going to assume that he is behaving like an idiot-ass because he does not understand obesity. Example, it is well known that you can "eat your way" through ANY exercise program. The key is food. The problem is once you are obese, that fat triggers even more hunger so it is very very difficult. I have no idea your stats (weight, BMI etc) but I assume you are at least 100# overweight if you are considering surgery. I strongly suggest mediation/couples counseling because you two don't even have a common understanding of the problem.

Kim, I know how painful that is. My old lab mix is 13, his eyes are clear, his coat is nice but his arthritis is terrible. I have to put rugs on hard floors everywhere he walks or his hind end just does the splits. We have a tiny step from the deck to the lawn and he can barely make it. He weighs 100# so not like carrying him is an option. I feel a little resentment that he was the family dog, but like most other responsibilities, his end of life decision falls on me. am sorry you are really going through this now. I took Scott to my friend Tom's birthday party last night. I had bought my friend a small flowering shrub (blue snowball bush!) for his birthday which he was surprisingly delighted with. We were there to sit around the campfire so were outdoors anyway and Scott and my friend Tom immediately went to work planting that shrub. It was a great start. They are all bigger rednecks than i am so it was an evening of telling hunting, horse riding and power tool stories...ha! We had fun and the party moved indoors. Suzy fell asleep on my lap about 9 and i finally had to pipe up and break up the party since I start work so darn early... they have made plans to tan a freaking deer hide together and I am doing a girls night at the gun range at the end of the month. Scott loved it - everybody hit it off with him as he is our people!