Hello fellow Bandsters,

I haven't been to this site in a while but I figured it's the place to be considering I've hit a rough patch lately. I'll try to keep it simple. Sometimes I wish I weren't banded. It sounds silly, and maybe even shallow, but there are times I just want to be able to eat something without thinking about it, or eat and drink at the same time. (Sometimes I'm thirsty when I'm eating!) I still feel uncomfortable when I go out to eat with my friends and the waiters/waitresses constantly ask if there's something wrong with my food since it's not all gone yet.

I've scheduled my 3rd fill for a week from Labor Day. I didn't want to do it before the holiday because I'm going back east to visit my family and didn't want to feel ill while I'm there. I hate feeling like I'm making concessions to my health because I can't shake my habit of eating.

I've been banded since Nov 08, and I sometimes can't believe that I still haven't been able to reprogram myself to not eat just because I'm mad, or sad, or bored. I figured a fill would be the right choice because sometimes I eat WAY more than I should (of course there's still the fear I've stretched my pouch, though when I feel pain I ALWAYS stop.) but some mornings I can't even get yogurt down. I try to drink some water in advance, when I know I'm going to eat soon, to loosen it. I just hate feeling restricted (in this way) by my pouch.

I've been pretty good. I gave up caffeine and sugar before my surgery, and haven't slipped on that. (Mostly I mean sweets and desserts, I know there's sugar in ketchup then sue me for eating it ) Sometimes I feel like I'm making myself crazy trying to be perfect, and other times I think if I actually were perfect then at least I wouldn't be wanting to eat Chinese food and french fries all the time.

Sorry for the ranting. Anyone else make it through rough patches like this? I know that the joy of being thinner should outweigh my want to eat, but what can I say... Old habits die hard I guess.

Thanks for your support!

There is nothing wrong with wanting to eat certain foods or lots of food at one time. This is how we ate for so long. It's going to take time. And there is nothing wrong with once in a while giving in to a craving and having a little of what you want. We're not monks! We're constantly surrounded by the sights and smells of food - most of which is unhealthy - full of fat, sugar and salt. But it tastes good. So we want it. No sin in that.

Re-programming your eating will take time. You are doing fine. When at restaurants, just say to the waitress that you've recently had surgery and can't eat as much as you used to, but that you'll take the rest home because it is very good. Be honest with your friends, too, if you can trust them to be supportive. Tell them you can eat most healthy foods, just not in large quantities. And if fills make you feel ill, then something is wrong. Talk to your doctor about it. Good luck.

Thanks for your response, I appreciate it. I know it takes a while to reprogram, I just feel like it's already been so long, ya know? I have mainly good days but some days, like recently, work is tough yadda yadda yadda and I just want to eat!

Thanks for the support.

Do you go onto liquids then mushies when you get sick? Like you say that some days you can't get anything down. Did you overeat the day before? I know my doctor told me that when I get sick (especially if I vomit), that the next day I need to drink liquids and if that goes well progress to mushies either later that day or the next day. That really helped me out with feeling sick.