Ok so...one of my very close friends is a fellow obestianite (just made that up :thumbup:), with diabetes, high blood pressure, and I can't remember what else. And she asked me today, "Why can't you just eat less on your own?", "Why don't you just shrink your stomach on your own?", and "Why not just use willpower?"

So I explained to her lapband is not the answer, It's a tool! You still have to have willpower, you still have to excercise, and you still have to watch what you eat.

But after speaking with her.... I am thinking....Why can't I do all those things?

But then I started thinking.......

Why do you always have to have haters when you are doing something positive??????

But then I snapped out of it and thought F**K her..... I am doing what's right for me! :thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:

Just needed to vent!!!! Anyone who is has haters on your back...use them to get to the next level! :thumbup:

Why? Why? Why?:tongue2::thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:

If someone like your friend (obese with health issues) asked me that, I'd be like "How has that worked for YOU?" and "Yeah, tried that, got the t-shirt, still fat."

She's probably both worried that something will happen to you -- die in surgery, complications afterwards, that sort of thing AND worried that it might actually work and you'll be slender and healthy while she remains fat.

Good for you that you're sticking to your guns -- it's your life and you deserve to be healthy and to make your own choices about your body.

If those things worked for you in the past then you wouldn't be considering surgery. Hang in there and don't let the negative remarks get to you.

You are right...to H*** with her. She is a Hater, and will only get worse as you blossom into the person that God intends for you to be. Haters....I love that word,by the way. What term did we use before Hip-Hop gave it to us? Anyway...I'm rambling, but I'll leave you with this. It is my favorite work-out song that really gets me pumped up. I'm going to paste a link to a song/video on youtube for a song called "Hate on Me" by Jill Scott. The words are fantastic, and speak to people just like your "friend"

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qw3Z8Oa7E3Y]YouTube - Jill Scott "Hate On Me"[/ame]

Just had to say that I love, love, LOVE me some Jill Scott!! And that song is spot on! You just gotta do your thing, and let the haters say what they will. Success will be your ultimate satisfaction!

You know I am not as outspoken as I was in my younger days. So although, I was thinking, "Why don't you try your suggestions, and let me know how it works out", I didn't say it! Because I feel good about myself even in my present condition and she doesn't like her present condition. So I feel bad for her......Honestly, we all know misery loves company. And I refuse to be her company any longer. I am doing me.... LOL! How's that for another piece of slang that was given to us by hip-hop!

Just had to say that I love, love, LOVE me some Jill Scott!! And that song is spot on! You just gotta do your thing, and let the haters say what they will. Success will be your ultimate satisfaction!

I agree 100%! How boring would life be if everyone agreed with us all the time anyhow?!?!? And I love me some Jill Scott, too!

BTW...haven't heard/seen the term "NoVA" in many a year! Not since leaving Richmond, that is. Miss the beauty of NoVA, too...not much stays green in summer here in Texas! :tongue2:

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And good luck with getting your date very soon, HF!

While I was considering surgery, my good (male) friend suggested that I just try to eat like a banded person would and see if that would work. Now, he is also overweight so I suggested we do it together. This brainstorm never got off the ground :tongue2:

Just before my surgery, he told me he may try to just eat exactly what I'm eating. I said, "OK, today is the day we start having one small meal and two Protein shakes each day." This idea also never took off.

This isn't about willpower.

This is about having the right tools.

HF2008, you should have asked her why she couldn't drop her BP with willpower, or how come diet and exercise can't regulate her blood sugars...

Though it is misguided, and mayb be subconsciously wanted her fat buddy to stay that way...she also truely might be fearful for you.

When my old roommate talked about gastric bypass it terrified me. I just knew she would die if she had that surgery, that she could never follow the guidelines, it horrified me. I still feel that way. I still think that it was too extreme...but I've learned to keep my opinions about other peoples bodies to my freaking self. She never did the gastric bypass. She couldn't even follow the pre-op rules so now she is trying to get insurance to pay for a lapband. I just smile and nod and tell her good luck.

The point is, your friend might think she is helping, but sometimes people have a lot of opinions on things they shouldn't...and should really keep their mouths shut. Good job on being able to keep your own shut, even if your friend cant.

While I was considering surgery, my good (male) friend suggested that I just try to eat like a banded person would and see if that would work. Now, he is also overweight so I suggested we do it together. This brainstorm never got off the ground :thumbdown:

Just before my surgery, he told me he may try to just eat exactly what I'm eating. I said, "OK, today is the day we start having one small meal and two protein shakes each day." This idea also never took off.

This isn't about willpower.

This is about having the right tools.

My boss was thinking about getting the lap band after I did and he saw my success. Then he decided to just 'eat what I was eating'. I don't know what he did at home, but I'm still losing and I think he may have gained...?

It is a precious tool and I am so thankful I have it.