I recently interviewed for a director position. Yesterday their recruiter called and in a few more words told me the job is mine if I want it. They want me to fly out to meet with the business next week. Between when I interviewed, and now, I've decided I don't want the job.

It would be a great job that I might be interested in later, but it's not a good match for my life right now. So I would like to part on somewhat good terms. However, since I know I don't want the job now, I don't feel it would be right to take any more of their time (or mine) by interviewing, and definitely not take their resources for the trip.

So I'm looking for help with messaging - the just right way to tell someone thanks but no thanks...

I've been in the position of offering jobs and subsequently having them declined. I liked promptness in the decision not to take the job and sincere thankfulness for the offer. These two simple acts, for me, burned no bridges.

I would really be honest with them. Tell them that between the time you interviewed and now, you've thought it over and discussed it with your husband, and you've decided that it isn't a good fit for your life at the current time.

1234 Main Street

Anytown, MI 48109

(734) 555-9009

email: myname@mi.edu

November 15, 2007

Dr. Jane Doe

Flibberdigibbit International

456 Elm Street, NW

Niceville, MI 48135

Dear Dr. Doe:

Thank you very much for your telephone call offering me the position of Director of Product Development with Flibberdigibbit International. While I believe firmly in the mission of your organization/am interested in the products you manufacture and appreciate the challenging opportunity you offer, I have decided after much consideration and reflection that this is just not the right time in my life to make a change in my career. Therefore, although it was a difficult decision, as I explained when we spoke by phone this morning, I must decline your offer. I do appreciate all the courtesy and hospitality extended to me by your office, and I wish you well in your endeavors.

Best regards,

(your signature)

Wheetsin

The letter sounds good to me.

I am also in the same boat, I was recently offered a great position working for a State Senator. It is such a wonderful opportunity for me, but I can't take it. The job is only an hours drive from my hometown but I can't do that. I do not have any family here and would be too far away for my kids. The job I have know has so much flexibility, I can take them and pick them up from school, can run them to their x-curricular stuff. I also make decent money here and have about five wks vacation a year, and come and go pretty much as I please, so I weighed it out and the tons more money and prestige is not worth it. Not at the expense of my babies. They are more important to me at this time, once they are older there will be other opportunities that will hopefully come my way.

The most important thing is to be grateful and to show them that. Sometimes the job just isn't the right fit and any person who hires employees should know that. I think as long as you are tactful, straightforward, and extremely thankful you will not burn that bridge. You might even want to mention that you would be open to the position in the future if it is ever available again.