Hello I need support. I was sleeved 11/28/16 I lost just 20 pounds but now I am stuck. I barely eat I exercise. But have no real support with my partner. She had bypass just under 2 years ago and. She doesn't help me in any way. Tonight she fried dinner and her response to me was the kids eat them like that. So get over it. I am at a loss of words and don't know what to do.

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Take over the cooking or cook for yourself. You'd be doing yourself harm not to take charge of what you need. No matter what, you have ultimate responsibility for your weight loss and your life.

A number of questions come to mind regarding your partner and your relationship. The main ones are whether she gave up on losing weight and whether something else is on her mind. If you haven't, why not talk to her without demands and accusations?

I like the idea about taking over the cooking. But, if for some reason you can't, then "pre-plan" your own meals. Decide what you can eat & plan for it. Prepare it & toss it in the fridge until you need it.

I'm not sure how successful your partner was with her surgery, but perhaps she's feeling as though you may do better or look better? As hard as this journey is, we all need support. Talk to her about it & see how she reacts. Let her know this is how you feel & remind her why you're doing this for yourself.

First of all, stop worrying. Worrying makes things worst.

Second of all, start by planning what you can eat and would prefer to eat (as each person's likes and dislikes towards certain food changes after the surgery.

1. Create a diet chart.

2. Start cooking for yourself. Start with small salads and Soups. They are easy, healthy and delicious.

3. If you do not have time during weekdays, cook during weekends and store it in the fridge, so that you can heat and eat during weekdays.

4. Stay positive.

5. Do not bring in any negativity between your spouse and yourself. She cooks fried food, smile and say 'it is okay', 'I can cook something or eat something that is already there in the fridge'.

In my opinion, it is not the surgery that makes you 100% healthy, it is 'you', 'your positive thinking towards a better lifestyle' that helps you in the long run. So instead of feeling bad or worried, cook for yourself. Trust me it is one of the best things to do for oneself. If you are cooking for the first time, try with simple soups and salads. Take responsibility for your life and well-being .

Thank you all for the advice. I have tried the cook food for the week before but being in a house of 24 people it's impossible. Everyone was eating what ever I made. I asked bout a mini fridge in our room to store food and I was told no .

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Wow I'm going to pray for your situation..... that's just a bit too much. As much as I prefer not

to eat can food.... you may have to resort to that. Whatever is going on in your life had to be there before the surgery. You really need to stand up and love yourself enough to take charge of your own life. People are going to do whatever they want to you as long as you let them. The problems your dealing with didn't start over night nor will they end that way. Sound like you all may need to seek some counseling. If she refuses to go, then go on your own. There are Pastors. Ministers and others that are close in your area, that can help and support you. Don't let anyone control you. People need bounderies. Bounderies helps people to know what you will and will not tolerate. Save yourself and seek counseling.

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Get this: http://www.containerstore.com/s/collections/banks-safes/fridge-locker/12d?productId=10030818

Then you can keep your food separate.

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