I just got called yesterday with my official approval - and surgery date for December.

I'm completely confused.

I'm at 39 Bmi and 34 years old. I just have this nagging fear about regrets in the long term. I'm scared of not losing much weight -- of not keeping it off...

I'm part of a church tradition that advocates a vegetarian or vegan diet. I've never done it. But I know that there's lots of research indicating that plant based diets are the most healthy -- disease fighting even. I'm afraid of ending up not getting healthy through this surgery and then finding that the plant based diet thing was my real solution. I'd hate that regret.

I'm worried about where I'll be in 15 or 20 years. I'm scared of complications or regrets. I'm scared the research will turn and that this decision will eventually come to be known as a foolish one.

My wife is super supportive and is crystal clear that I should go through with it. I'm fully conflicted.

Did anyone have these kinds of mixed emotions?

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Wwboy, I can so relate to your feelings in your first initial post. My surgery is on Monday. I have made myself a wreck reading and overthinking every possible issue/complication that might happen! Can you share with me what made you finally decide you were doing the right thing?

My concerns go from the worst possible outcome (dying on the table) to just flat out loving food so much I'm afraid I will miss not being able to eat the things I love. Feeling so conflicted

You know, a big piece of the puzzle for me was listening to the responses of people on this thread...one person remarked: "it's risk vs. reward". That really stuck with me. The more I thought about it and prayed about it, the more I came to accept that NOT getting surgery was not a zero-risk proposition...which I think is our tendency as people. Staying put had its own risks. And as I weighed my options, it became clear that the risk of surgery (while precipitous) was actually smaller than the risk of not getting surgery -- and of course the potential rewards of surgery completely dwarf the "reward" (if you could call it that) of continuing my old path.

Another thing I thought about was all the conversations I had with trusted friends and mentors before I even got to this place in the process. About 8 months ago is when I started thinking about getting surgery. I didn't entertain the thought until I had long conversations with my most important allies in life. Each and every one of them concluded that they thought it was right for me. While I don't just automatically do what other people think I should, I'm not dumb enough to imagine that I can't benefit from the advice of those I trust. It didn't make sense to question all of their advice and support just before it was 'go time' because I got cold feet.

I wrote another related thread to this one...an update after my first surgery (I ended up having 2...read the post to see the details (http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/356802-updated-approved-but-should-i-go-through-with-it-a-second-time/).

What I can say now, is that I'm 4 weeks post-op today. And so far very happy with my decision. The negative side-effects are present. But I can deal with them. I've lost almost 60lbs overall since last April and I'm down 22 or so since surgery. I weigh less than I did as a senior in high school, my clothes are falling off, and I feel so much more physically active and 'able'... It's glorious. I'm off of my BP meds, metformin, etc. And I'm sure I'll get to quit using my CPAP within the next year. One month out, I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

Heading to the other link now