Here we go my "steadies." Post away.

good morning!

Claudia I've gotten 2 fills - I don't think this one is doing the trick, I think I'm going to get another in a week.

Bman I hope you're better today - yukky flu! I think I'd be flipping out if I threw up, I'd get all paranoid too. Who wouldn't?

Bk I'm glad you figured out fitday - its a great tool.

Wheres Nat and Kaydoll?

Steph thanks to you and b man for telling me about fitday it has been a life saver

b-man under 30 is not considered obese I am proud of you and u should have no trouble losing the weight

I workout twice yesterday proud of me

claudia you are right we need to keep each other in check

Hey Ladies -

I'm here. I checked my journal and have only lost 2 pounds since 2/14. I am depressed. I decided to trick my metabolism and I'm eating high calorie, high fat foods for 3 days. Then I'll go back to 600 calories per day like I've been eating, and I'll increase my exercise. I'm hoping that I will drop like 35 pounds in a week that way. Okay, 35 is a *bit* excessive, but you know what I mean.

Things with my "friend" have come to a screeching halt. I'm back to being single with no prospects. What a waste of time and energy. And that "jesus" routine is an act. I had no business fooling around with an employee to begin with. Lesson learned.

I can't wait for Friday. I think I'm depressed again. *sigh*

TTYL,

Natty Bumppo

Nat - I just yahoo'd a reply to you.

I'm going to track today on fitday - and now I'm getting on the treadmill.

Hey Ladies...sorry I haven't posted much lately but I was totally exhausted after a weekend in the hospital w/my son and his foot surgery!

So NAT....I'm right there with you on the scale thing!!! Although I dropped a quick 5 pounds after I got my 2nd fill.....and I still feel like my fill is good....my scale hasn't budged in the past week. It could just be PMS (I'm hoping and praying!!), but still......I'm back to tracking my calories (b/c of my evil co worker who brought in M&Ms and the Girl Scout who delivered my cookies!)...and I finally got my fat butt on the elliptical this AM and did 20 minutes of exercise! YEAH ME!! So 1 down, 14 more to go this month to make my exercise goal!

OH yeah...and I'm single and lonely too Nat....I am distancing myself from my 'friend' who said that he doesn't want to date anyone, yet that is exactly what we were doing in my book, (men are so messed up!!!), so I'm back to square one too. UGH.....

STEPH...sorry to hear you're fill isn't sticking!!! Mine is still giving me good restriction, but I need to stop the 'grazing' that I've been doing w/the chocolate around my office....

Ok, more later, just wanted to check in!

Hey Girls-

I have been insanely busy and hectic, but I am thinking of you all. (I am here Steph in spirit!).

((Nat)) PM me when you can. Love you girl!!!!

I am calling out for help girls. I don't know WTF is up with me but I am on a bit of a bender. Not eating tons the past week, but definitely not making good choices. I got my first "stuck" food this past weekend...a chinese chicken finger..WTF? I didn't even eat that crap before this surgery. I have a weird introspective idea of why I am doing this self sabotage and I feel weird posting, but here goes...I think I am deathly afraid of being thinner. I know, stop laughing since this chick is still about 220 lbs...but I am feeling so much better of myself. I bumped into an old flame last week and flirted my stuff. You wouldn't mind, but I have the most wonderful husband and I have no business entertaining thoughts of other men (okay, I can entertain but certainly not act on them). I truly don't think I ever would, but there is this weird part of me that fears me getting more comfortable with myself. I am being all Dr. Phil, but I think it goes back to the fact that growing up, my dad was totally adulterous...cheat cheat cheat. My mom knew about girlfriends..I remember my Dad's g'friend when I was about 5, she gave me a birthday gift-yup, nice and damaging Dad, thanks. So I think I have this ridiculous fear that I have caught the adultery bug, and keeping me fat and totally resistable keeps things in check.

Am I ready for the nuthouse, or what? At any rate, I need your support to get myself on track..stop eating the junk. No more chips and oreos that I have been sneaking every night for the past week. I feel like coming clean to you all will help me to admit this and get it in check before I do some real damage. Thanks in advance for your support girls!!!!

I will check in later...be well everyone.

BTW B-man, I just noticed your weight..I am so freakin happy for you! You are working it out girl. Way to go.

yes bk- we need to stick together you can call me I can p/m my number to you or any of you wonderful woman.

Ok so I am depressed I just found out I am not getting the Position to move to Il I guess I got to wait and pray another one comes available soon . They asked me to wait 6 more months for that one . It hurts I been trying to relocate for a while but I really want to do this with this comany so I need to be patient . Also I dint loose wait this week but I will I know things will be better plus Bev lol made me have the flu lol I getting sick not good . Well girls I will talk to you soon pls take care .

clau:sick

OMG -- well, the brakes went out on my car on Monday

I borrowed my grandmothers car till those could be fixed... the cluth on her car went out on Tuesday!

Yeah... no kidding... the same day that i had West Nile/bubonic plague.

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BUT today... I got the title to that car that Ive had since last August.. that the dealer wouldnt send me the title. I finally got it today!!! 6 months later... i can sell, drive, ANYTHING my car. yeah!!!

I am not carless!!

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Claud... hahaha... i dont think i can transmit germs through the internet... but these were pretty horrible germs. maybe they DID make it that far... hahaha -- So sorry about the job hon. you should find a way to transfer to Indiana. Then, you can come exercise with me!!

I will write more later... just had to tell you all the news!

BEV- When I transfer to Il I be closer to you :girl_hug: then you can really be on my case lol for slaking off lol I need someone like that . :cake: it sucks I didnt get it but I have faith soon I will be going .

things happen for a reason !!

and yes the flu made it out here to california lol

bk- what are we going to do to help each other ? think of something ok .

steph - so do you have anyone for me lol ?

nat- get better girl ..

clau:sick (still sick but at work )

to all the ladies .. Happy Woman day !! ..

:clap2: :clap2: :clap2: We are beautiful and each day getting more beautiful since we already have a great heart .!! take care and enjoy your day!!

clau!!!:clap2:

Clau - hope you feel better soon, and sorry to hear you didn't get the job - keep your head up, maybe the next one will be better!!

Beversman - YAY on the car title! :girl_hug: It's so nice to hold that in your hand, isn't it? AND! Way to GO on the weight loss - you're a machine!

Kay - I think I'm a bit afraid of getting skinnier, too. I've been shy as long as I can remember (and heavy as well) and I've always felt a little odd when people (boys) check me out. I'm not sure how well I'm going to deal with getting skinnier - the last time I lost weight (still didn't get skinny - got to 167 at 5'6", about size 14) I was in a serious relationship, so I didn't notice people checking me out. Already I've gotten more attention. A bit unnerving! BUT girlfriend - you are strong and beautiful and amazing, so I know you'll pull through this funk! Maybe print out the bandster rules, have them handy, and look at them before you eat something bad. Then it'll make you think - is this Chinese Chicken Finger worth it??? Also, I've found forcing myself to work out makes me feel better and boosts my mood. It's hard to get out and exercise, so maybe tell yourself - if I do 10 minutes today that's ok - once you start going, you may find yourself doing it longer!

Nat - sorry your friend is still upsetting you... I hope you guys have a chance to talk and see if it's something worth persuing! You're so worth it girl! Don't "settle" (like I'd ever expect you to!) :cake:

Gotta run...

CLAUDIA i AM NOT SURE

I THINK MAYBE MAKE SURE THAT TICKER IS MOVING AND IF IT IS NOT MAYBE A PM TO SAY WHAT UPS WITH NOT LOSING

I LIKE HAVING SOMEONE TO ANSWER TOO

B-MAN SO HAPPY YOU GOT YOUR CAR SORRY BOUT THE BRAKES I NEED NEW ONES TOO

Hey Ladies -

I had 2 glasses of wine and a good cry for dinner. I have no idea what's wrong with me. I want to text my friend and tell him we need to talk - which he tried to do yesterday -but I know he won't answer me, plus that is a total bitch-move, so I turned off my phone. HAHAH I'm going to Chicago tomorrow. My job is hard, the people are crazy, and really, I've lost myself again.

I was eating rotisserie chicken for dinner, I put some light Miracle Whip on it to "moisten" it and the bitch got stuck. I thought I was going to fucking DIE. I was puking into my kitchen sink. GROSS, I know. No more chicken. And no more mindless eating. Maybe we've hit the 3 month funk, ladies. We have to regain the eye of the tiger!

KayDoll - I love you so much. You are not your father. I think I'm afraid of being thin as well, though I've always craved attention, I have a buffer around me that keeps people away. Work through it. I know you're busy but you have insurance - have you thought about therapy? I go every 2 weeks and it helps validate me.

StephC - I love you so much! *hug* thanks for the kind words and your enduring support.

VaB - Men. Can't live with 'em, can't chop 'em into tiny pieces and feed 'em to the dog. Seriously - fuck 'em. I'm so sick of wanting a man and being hurt by men and wondering what they're thinking and trying to figure 'em out, and being sad cuz I don't have one and then infuriated when I do. It's a trip, isn't it?

Annie my love, I will never settle. NEVER. I can do bad all by myself. Thanks for believing in me, gal! And I believe that you will break out of your shell and embrace yourself as the goddess that you truly are. You have a bright and shining spirit, Annie Banannie. One day you'll believe it.

Claudie - Sorry about the job. Where in IL are you trying to go? You'll make it there someday. May I ask (I hope this isn't rude) is English your first language? I love the way you write, and I hear a Russian accent in your posts. Could be Nat Psychosis, however.

bk - how are you doing babygirl? Are you in need of a fill, or are you still puking? I go to the doc next Friday and am looking for one more 1cc fill (even though my chicken attacked me tonight). I think it would be good for me. How is the KID situation? I know you've been posting, but I miss you girlfriend!

BBK - how are you doing? You've had a hard time of it lately.

WHERE IS SWEETHOT?!!? Gotdamn gal, where you been?

B'Man - I love you. Sorry to hear about your illness but I'm glad you're all better. Glad you got the title to your car. Sorry about your car troubles though - that sucks. Glad your Granny lent you her car, but damn her car troubles too! I hope things look up for you soon.

Who am I forgetting? SexyTexan... wait, what's your handle? How are you doing? And Maurdan - what's shakin gal? I hope the rest of you are hanging in there.

I haven't gotten my fat ass on the elliptical at all lately. I need to do just that, or I am really going to regret it in a few weeks. I am going to eat freely (though relatively in moderation ) through Sunday. Monday I'm back on it. I decided to go to Chicago at the last minute. I knew if I sat around here with NOTHING to do all weekend I'd be text messaging "my friend" and I need to stay strong. Nothing like a moment of weakness to have you texting and calling inappropriately. LOL I suck at that. He needs to come to me, though he called me last night and I TOTALLY ignored his punkass. ***laughing***

Love you guys! Truly truly I do!

Nathalie

(((Natlove))) we love you too! I'm so sorry men are such jerks! I know all of you are beautiful sexy intelligent women who deserve the very best - don't worry your prince will come - he may be disguised as a middle aged nerd but he's out there somewhere. LOL

You all sound so busy - I think I'm just so freakng bored I'm eating out of boredom. I don't go back to work full time until April - today I did nothing - seriously - nothing. I stayed in my pajamas until 2:30 - then I put on sweats. I went out to get the mail from a RICH ladies house and I never even put socks on. Came home and laid around until I threw dinner together - and yes it was a 5 minute meal - my day consisted of internet and tv - I watched an old Hitchcock movie and that was it. Oh my only exercise other then walking to the refridgerator or bathroom was 30 minutes on my treadmill - and then I was watching Borat - I'm a freaking lazy stinking bum! I never even put a bra on today. I definitely need another fill because I ate least 1300 or more today. Kick my ass!

Kaydoll - I know exactly what you are saying. I have even told my husband in one of our low marriage points that it was a good thing I was fat or I'd have been out screwing around. I guess I can be the bitchiest of the bitches when I want to be. But I love him and wouldn't ever want to hurt him in that way. It just feels so good to get that sexual attention - ya know?

Bman - I'm glad your car woes are looking up - did you get your brakes fixed? It wasn't toooo expensive was it? So do you now have 2 cars? Are you selling one or keeping it as a spare? I hope you feel better after the flu from hell - you know like I said before I'd have been sh-tting all day if I caught it - I'd be screaming my butt hurts - my roids would be screaming and life would suck for all around me.

VA - I hope you take some time to rest. I also hope your ds is doing better. What is up with those flipping little girl scouts!? They did the same thing to me - I still have half a box of tagalongs crying out my name! And candy - it doesn't have to be chocolate, it can be jelly beans and even tho I don't really like any except the black ones .. I'll eat 'em. And color code them while I eat the bag. All the black - then red - yellow - orange - green - white are last.

Anyway - I love you girls - all of ya - all that Nat named and any she may have forgot - I'm so glad we found each other, you're the best!

Well, i took my one month pictures... i cant tell a difference... ggggrrrr

I guess you can see my collar bones now... and I think maybe I lost some in my arms... my belly was showing in my pics (thanks alot to the camera man for telling me)... so now I dont want to post them on here... ha

I will put them on yahoo though... I dont know where that 9 lbs was that I lost... i sure cant tell.

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Nat -- love you too hon! Dont let a damn man get you down. Do as i say, not as I do... :-) don't get into a "brandi" funk.... that is what drinking and crying is you know. hehe (hugs) if he was that much trouble THAT soon... imagine how much trouble he would have been later

Steph - so glad ive found all of you too! I've been lazy as well... dont feel bad

Bannanie - oh yes, I did a happy dance when I got ahold of that title, and it didnt leave my hands the rest of the day.

The old car with bad brakes... is a hunk of JUNK. so, it is off to the scrap yard. So LONG, and good riddance.

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I am a bit worried girls. I have this bad pain on my left side (above my stomach) that wont go away. It has hurt since Tuesday when I had my bad virus (throwing up 3 times). If I breath deep, or stretch up... it hurts.

I am afraid I damaged something. Wouldnt THAT be my luck. One sick day and trouble.... I sure hope not, but it doesnt seem to be letting up. I am hoping that if I give it a few days that it will be ok. I am just worried. :girl_hug:

I hate to run to the Dr. but it sure does hurt.