Hi fellow Canucks

You have helped me make a huge decision and it is bigger than i thought. i booked my surgery aftre reading from all of you ,and although i checked out the other chats , it was with the canadians who were supportive, compassionate, and I just felt were with me all the way. I am supposed to start my two week cottage cheese/yogurt eating wednesday and I am getting scared. I just came back from a movie where i stuffed in a huge box of popcorn and a double whopper with cheese........damn, am i going to be able to do this??? I also realize that this relationship that I have struggled with now for some time, that of all times..but I am not gettiing support here and as much as I loved this person, i am tired of feeling hurt and dealing with someone who seems so apathetic , great timing to end it huh?. I have never put myself first, I mean it has always been, making my parents happy, but failing cuz i couldn't please us both, trying with my ex husband and realizing I married the wrong person and sticking in there for 12 yrs and eating myself into a coma, then losing good friends to cancer ( four in two years) and three relationships in 14 years that have gone the way of the dodo including this one where I don't know what to do and I can't

let things just go, even if they are bad for me. I am scared, I am soo scared of this, but I feel I have no choice and I have to get through it, I mean what else is there for me?? obesity has come calling now since I am 23 and with three kids and more and more weight ..I have doubled my weight and don't feel like me anymore, but somehow that was never incentive enough for me to lose it, WHY????? I hate it and it can kill me.

I guess that I will have to do this on my own and don't know how soon after I can drive etc cuz i don't want to have to ask my folks to look after me, I mean I HAVE MADE this choice and I have to see it through. I am sorry that I am bitching here, but I have no one else who knows or who will understand but god I am scared. How can i stick with this food diet thing for two weeks before and 4 weeks after if I can't stick to a diet now???

I have him in my house, the tension here is unbearable, and here i am pathetically drinking ( i usually don't , so not another vice) and I am here in my basement on line to people I don't know. Man, I dont know how I got here and I don't know if I will ever get out.

I am to be banded august 10th I guess if I don't chicken out.

Please anyone help me, how does one get through this, a relationship that is dead and look after oneself and how soon?

I would appreciate ANY advice and geeze I sound like I am 16...nope in my forties!

thanks

KIm

kim,I don't know where you live if it was stated i missed it. I live in Southwest Va. If you are close i would be glad to visit with you. Or you can e-mail me and i will give you my #. As for the LB. You can do it. I was baneded 6-13-06. As for the guy, Well if he does not love you now, would you want him to love you later???? I'll be there for you. slimwithin.

kimmason , i know how hard it is to feel so alone , i have lots of friends and a big family , but very few peoplr actually know how it is to feel so alone , i can really sympathise with you . I actually am very interested with this particular lady and we spend a lot of time together , but the second i leave her house i feel like a drop in the ocean .she has a boyfriend and i dont think she has any plans to break any thing off with him and i dont want to press the issue , but i know as thing chang e in my life i will become more outward and find someone if she doesnt realize what she has in front of her .Sorry about venting i dont get to very often .....I do feel like a pebble in a hill alot of the time , so that is where i am getting a lot of my strength

Hi fatmikeslim. wow thankyou soo much for opening up and I can empathize with your unrequited love. It is soo painful.

I hope that as you move on,lose weight and gain more confidence that she sees that in you and if she doesn't , then someone else wil see that spark. You can bet on it!

Hi slimwithin

I am not near you unfortunetly I am in toronto canada, actually newmarlet area here. i would have loved it if we lived closer and could meet. I REALLY need the support and then can see how someone else is getting through this. I am the night before my preop diet and I am stuffing it all in and fought all day with Peter,, cried three times and thta is not the confident me..infact I don't feel confident at all.

Thank sfor caring.