So I made my goal weight of 165 about 15 months after being banded in Jan of 09. Since then I have slowly put on 15 lbs... No biggie right? Except that I FEEL FAT!!! It's just killing me!!! I just got a fill thinking that living tight again for a while will help me lose the damn 15 lbs that are a more like an elephant on my back than a monkey. Not happening. I lost 4 lbs right off the bat with the fill, but thats it.. How is it that I managed to lost 90 lbs and I cant seem to take of a meesly 15??

The nicer weather is coming, so I plan to get out and exercise more - I've slacked off on that quite a bit in the last 4 months or so.

I think this is more about the fact that Im worried that I really think I"m FAT. 175 on a large framed woman of 5ft 6in is NOT FAT. But I look in the mirror and I'm devistated. I dont want my BF to touch me and I get really pissed off when people say I look great.

How do I get this body image out of my damn head!

I look in the mirror and still see a fat person (ok , I am but not as fat as I was). I actually have pictures of me from before surgery and from last week up on the computer to help keep me motivated. I also put on gym shorts that I haven't worn in about three years since I just started going to the gym again and haven't bought any new gym clothes. I found I could fit all of me in one leg. Unfortunately, I had to work out in those humiliating shorts. My new motivator? I want to wear a swimsuit this year. Not sure if that helps you or not.

I don't really know what to tell you about getting the fat person out of your head, but I do know what you mean. In the past three weeks I've put five pounds back on and I feel HORRIBLE. It's literally the first time in the two years since I've been banded that I've gained weight. I need a fill, for sure. I can eat bread (which I've never been able to do before no matter where my restriction level has been), which is not good.

Anyway. Once you get used to your body being a certain place, it feels bad when it goes back (especially when you know how that weight gain felt before). I get that on a 225 pound girl like myself, 5 pounds isn't a ton. But it sure feels like it. I hate getting dressed for work because everything feels tight again.

Dig in and get yourself back where you want to be. The whole weight loss thing takes longer as you get smaller. So that 15 pounds is just about the same as dropping 90 when you were bigger. Good luck and don't lose hope!

I am still trying to lose the last 15 lbs. It seems no matter what I do I can not drop it. I have not had a fill in a year but do not need one. So I just keep working out and watching what I eat.

Cheri

Wow do I understand that. Unfortunately I don't think that ever goes away. I gained about 10lbs over the holidays but it's come right off again. I tend to gain that much every year but then come Spring and Summer I start losing again. I had so many ups and downs and platues with my weight loss but I went from 270 to 135, so looking back I feel good about that because I know there were times I got close to giving up. I wear a size 2/4 right now which should blow my mind or something but I swear, most days I wake up and still feel like the size 24 I was. However, the little nagging, uneasy feeling I get now from gaining 5...10...or 15 lbs is just more motivation to get back on track. I'm sorry I can't be of more help.